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I have a lady friend and I know her b/f and they have had a relationship for about 3 years now. I'd have to say that I am truly friends with her and I am really good friends with him. We do things together on our own without him and sometimes I do things with him without her. It really is a good thing and nothing about it needs to be messed up by bringing petty girl / guy hormone bull**** in the mix. it's just disrespectful to everyone if lines like that were needed to be crossed and anyone that thinks otherwise is pretty weak imo. We are 26 and 27 years old.
To each his own... I certainly wouldn't choose to lose my femininity for the sole purpose of having guy friends.
But if a women insists on being feminine with her male friends, of course they will sometimes be thinking of her as more than a platonic friend. I guess that with my male friends, I see no need to throw my femininity in their faces constantly. Wouldn't that be akin to being a **** tease?
And in addition, never have I given any of my boyfriends any cause to worry about my having close male friends. And my male friends don't see my behaviour towards them change whether I'm single or in a relationship.
So tonight, my boyfriend and I were having a late night snack at a Chinese restaurant. There was a table of about six guys and two females near us. They were all college age people. The women were all giggly, loud, blonde, attention seeking, and being feminine. At one point, my boyfriend angrily muttered something about how he could never date girls like that... to which I replied, that's why you only date women.
I know that I don't appeal to most men as girlfriend material, but that's just fine with me. The right guy loves me for who I am. So we both win.
I'd say a good 90% of my friends have male parts. It works out quite well.
Every once in a while, a guy I had on the "Just friends ladder" will inform me that he used to have a crush on me. Usually, my reaction is "Huh?!" in disbelief - because I'm apparently super oblivious. Though my latest line to use is: "Ya know, and I was single for all that time and never realized I coulda scored?!" which usually lightens the air.
I'm still friends with all of the guys because the crush is either past tense or because we both agree that hormones are stinky like a baby's diaper.
My husband is perfectly fine with me having a ton of guy friends. He knows that I'm not going to stop having friends whom I get along with just because they happen to have male parts.
Best one yet, on the "why can't we be friends" - I've actually had one of my girl friends inform me of her crush on me. That was a moment I was completely unprepared for, and had the Deer-In-The-Headlights look.
I have a lady friend and I know her b/f and they have had a relationship for about 3 years now. I'd have to say that I am truly friends with her and I am really good friends with him. We do things together on our own without him and sometimes I do things with him without her. It really is a good thing and nothing about it needs to be messed up by bringing petty girl / guy hormone bull**** in the mix. it's just disrespectful to everyone if lines like that were needed to be crossed and anyone that thinks otherwise is pretty weak imo. We are 26 and 27 years old.
Well alrighty then.....see look.....pent up hormones....see what they'll do to you.....
That's great and all....but how often do ya'll hang out? If it's more than twice a month.....I can guarantee you there are crushes goin' on.....I can tell just by your response.
I'd say a good 90% of my friends have male parts. It works out quite well.
Every once in a while, a guy I had on the "Just friends ladder" will inform me that he used to have a crush on me. Usually, my reaction is "Huh?!" in disbelief - because I'm apparently super oblivious. Though my latest line to use is: "Ya know, and I was single for all that time and never realized I coulda scored?!" which usually lightens the air.
I'm still friends with all of the guys because the crush is either past tense or because we both agree that hormones are stinky like a baby's diaper.
My husband is perfectly fine with me having a ton of guy friends. He knows that I'm not going to stop having friends whom I get along with just because they happen to have male parts.
Best one yet, on the "why can't we be friends" - I've actually had one of my girl friends inform me of her crush on me. That was a moment I was completely unprepared for, and had the Deer-In-The-Headlights look.
OMG i know! Isn't that a shocker....I had one of my girlfriends tell me about a dream she had about me....let's just say I really didn't want the details but got them anyway.......I never looked at her the same after that....I would have tried to walk away from the situation to wrap my head around what she just told me but we were in a car on a free way....I guess I could have jumped out but....very creepy.....
lol.....I don't knwo what's up with me and all these wierd old songs today but.......anyway...
A few of my co-workers and I were debating today at lunch wether strait guys and girls can be JUST friends.....
I said that between the ages of 13 and 35ish........it's really really really really rare because of hormones. Either they both develop a crush or one or the other does....very rarley have I heard of a completley platonic relationship with no attractions or crushes ever within this age range.
40's and beyond is probably easier since you don't have crazy hormones bouncing all over the place.
Your opinions???
I thought I had a very good friend with someone for years. And I can honestly say I miss him. And from the very beginning of our friendship, I told him, I'm never going to fall in love again, or date, or be with any man...a platonic friendship is all I am seeking. He said ok...now there have been times, when we've had disagreements, basically over religion...and he's grown cold, and hasn't contacted me for a few weeks to a couple of months. Then, all of a sudden, there he was, and we were friends again.
But, once during a conversation, I told him, I was inviting an old school mate male, for dinner to thank him for all that he had done for me, professionally. My family was coming for dinner, and I told him if the man felt uncomfortable with that, I would respect that. I also told him, I told the man what I had told him.
I heard from him only once since then, and it was a very short converstion. I believe he's become disenchanted with me....I also believe he put me somewhere way up on some pedistal that I couldn't possibly be...and his words that we would be friends for ever, did not hold true...
I've also learned, which disgusts me to no end, that when a man refers to a woman as a friend, not all men, but most...that it usually means, they are intimate. It is difficult for a man to be friends with a woman, b/c well, you know.
I have been friends with several men in my lifetime, and only one that I know of, didn't want to make it into an overnight thing. He is highly respected in my book.
I've never understood, myself, why men, find it so difficult to be a platonic friend with a woman without falling in love with her?
Let me say also, that you love your friends right. I think when a man and a woman are friends, they know the most intimate things about each other, b/c it is easy to spill your soul....but then, something happens...unlike your male friends or your woman friends, you want to give this person something very very special...you mistake a really good friendship for falling in love....so, you give that person yourself...b/c it is the only thing you have to give really. And now, a perfectly good friendship may be ruined if, it doesn't work out.
It really is a good thing and nothing about it needs to be messed up by bringing petty girl / guy hormone bull**** in the mix. it's just disrespectful to everyone if lines like that were needed to be crossed and anyone that thinks otherwise is pretty weak imo. We are 26 and 27 years old.
Mother Nature has a wicked sense of humor...just wait...
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