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Old 10-17-2008, 01:21 PM
 
Location: North Florida
414 posts, read 1,863,450 times
Reputation: 358

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My friend and I have a very honest and open friendship. We can tell each other anything without the other getting upset. She went through a very nasty divorce and it was final last summer. This spring, her eldest daughter moved out of her house into an apartment that her ex-husband is paying for. The daughter and ex-husband were very sneaky and my friend didn't even know the daughter was moving until she came home from work and all her daughter's things were gone. My friend was floored.

Well, today I was doing a property search through our county property appraiser to see what some condos in a subdivision were going for. On a whim, I typed in my friend's last name and lo and behold, a condo had been purchased by the ex-husband for the daughter. It was in both their names! My friend thought the ex-husband was just paying the rent on the place.

So, I called my friend and told her what was going on. She was grateful to me for telling but furious with her daughter and ex-husband. Did I overstep my bounds? It is a matter of public record. I feel really crappy, which probably means I shouldn't have said anything.
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Old 10-17-2008, 01:29 PM
 
Location: SUNNY AZ
4,589 posts, read 13,167,951 times
Reputation: 1850
Quote:
Originally Posted by crash330 View Post
My friend and I have a very honest and open friendship. We can tell each other anything without the other getting upset. She went through a very nasty divorce and it was final last summer. This spring, her eldest daughter moved out of her house into an apartment that her ex-husband is paying for. The daughter and ex-husband were very sneaky and my friend didn't even know the daughter was moving until she came home from work and all her daughter's things were gone. My friend was floored.

Well, today I was doing a property search through our county property appraiser to see what some condos in a subdivision were going for. On a whim, I typed in my friend's last name and lo and behold, a condo had been purchased by the ex-husband for the daughter. It was in both their names! My friend thought the ex-husband was just paying the rent on the place.

So, I called my friend and told her what was going on. She was grateful to me for telling but furious with her daughter and ex-husband. Did I overstep my bounds? It is a matter of public record. I feel really crappy, which probably means I shouldn't have said anything.
I probably wouldn't have said anything but I don't think you should beat yourself up over it......
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Old 10-17-2008, 01:35 PM
 
Location: Los Angeles
754 posts, read 1,449,602 times
Reputation: 710
Why is it a bad thing for a father to buy his daughter property? Is he skipping alimony payments or something? Sorry, I'm just not seeing the issue here. Other than the daughter having to carefully tread the waters between her parents.
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Old 10-17-2008, 01:35 PM
 
Location: northeast US
739 posts, read 2,187,766 times
Reputation: 446
I prefer to mind my own business and not be a snoop or snitch or interfere in the personal matters of another family.
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Old 10-17-2008, 01:39 PM
 
Location: New Jersey
1,181 posts, read 3,060,075 times
Reputation: 464
You did the right thing. Rarely do people watch out for one another these days. Since her name in on the property, she needed to be made aware of it. You're a good friend.
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Old 10-17-2008, 01:42 PM
 
Location: Incognito
7,005 posts, read 21,344,116 times
Reputation: 5522
IMO you didn't do nothing wrong. A friend's a friend in good or in bad times. I wouldn't allow anybody to try to hurt my friend for anything in the world.
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Old 10-17-2008, 01:43 PM
 
Location: North Florida
414 posts, read 1,863,450 times
Reputation: 358
The ex lost his job this summer and has not paid child support for the children who are still at home since Sept. He bought the condo for the daughter in the spring. One of the main reasons I told my friend was because she is struggling financially to take care of her family and took a job that offered tuition assistance so her eldest daughter could attend school without debt. The daughter started school in the fall and moved out in the spring. My friend is still at that job so that her daughter can get tuition assistance. Technically, the daughter has to be living in the same household as the parent in order to qualify for assistance.
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Old 10-17-2008, 01:59 PM
 
3,488 posts, read 8,223,730 times
Reputation: 3972
I think you did the right thing. About time people started looking out for each other instead of being all about themselves.
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Old 10-17-2008, 02:00 PM
 
Location: Los Angeles
754 posts, read 1,449,602 times
Reputation: 710
Quote:
Originally Posted by crash330 View Post
The ex lost his job this summer and has not paid child support for the children who are still at home since Sept. He bought the condo for the daughter in the spring. One of the main reasons I told my friend was because she is struggling financially to take care of her family and took a job that offered tuition assistance so her eldest daughter could attend school without debt. The daughter started school in the fall and moved out in the spring. My friend is still at that job so that her daughter can get tuition assistance. Technically, the daughter has to be living in the same household as the parent in order to qualify for assistance.
Got it, I would've done the same thing.
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Old 10-17-2008, 02:26 PM
 
Location: Austin
4,103 posts, read 7,028,983 times
Reputation: 6748
Quote:
Originally Posted by MommyV View Post
You did the right thing. Rarely do people watch out for one another these days. Since her name in on the property, she needed to be made aware of it. You're a good friend.
I agree with this. It's not like it was a small purchase, we are talking real estate here.
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