Please register to participate in our discussions with 2 million other members - it's free and quick! Some forums can only be seen by registered members. After you create your account, you'll be able to customize options and access all our 15,000 new posts/day with fewer ads.
So, I have this dilemma - ladies, what do you do when your guy touches you way too much? what I mean is, I have gone out with a few guys who have just done way too much touching. Example, we could be sitting on the couch, watching tv, and he feels the need to continually stroke my arm, or want to kiss me, or touch me in some way. Most of the time, I want to just watch tv (especially when the game's on!) and enjoy the company, but I don't want to ALWAYS have to be touched. Do any of you feel this way?
I'm sure it's because they like me and that's a nice thing, but it borders on annoying when he has to touch me at all times. How do I politely tell him to not touch/stroke me all the time without sounding like a *b* or that I don't want affection?
Another scenario I encounter is when I have been on vacation with a guy, I don't want to feel like I have to always get intimate just because we get back to the hotel to change for dinner or something like that? Can't we wait until later in the evening for that?
Now, I love affection and romance and sex and all that, don't get me wrong, but c'mon, enough already!! Any tips or thoughts would be appreciated.
thanks! I guess the problem is coming up with a nice way to say it without hurting his feelings. hopefully his ego is intact enough to handle a simple request?
Quote:
Originally Posted by amanda0808
Just explain your reasons to him. If he respects you, he'll back off a little when you want him to.
If it bothers you that much, it sounds like what you need is someone who prefers the same level of contact that you do. Everyone's different. I had one ex who would never sit down and cuddle to watch tv...we had to sit in different chairs! I didn't like that and it wound up being one of the deal-breakers.
A lot of women are asking for more of this casual contact from men that you seem to be getting. Let the guys know what you prefer and if they need/want more, y'all can go your separate ways.
Whatever you do, don't try subterfuge... we guys are too dumb. Spell it out. If they're man enough to understand without pouting, so much the better. Remember, often we get conflicting stories. How many times have we been told (through books, TV, movies, etc.) that we need to be "more caring." Touching a woman (without expecting sex) shows them how much we care. Take the time to show them, through a touch, that we care, etc. Sure, not all women like it. But if everytime I touch you you get up to empty the trash, I'm not gonna get it.
Like Amanda said... just bring it up in conversation. But, remember, some guys have that freaky "fragile male ego" thing. Others might be like, "whew... I felt weird doing that all the time, but I wanted you to know I care!"
You are too kind, Cap'n!! , I don't mind the usual amount, but really, if I'm trying to watch a show/game, or cook, or something, it gets a little bothersome!
Quote:
Originally Posted by Capt. Dan
Yes he should be considerate if he knows your feelings on this. But LORD HAVE MERCY WOMAN! Look in the mirror. CAN YA BLAME HIM?????????????
I had this issue I mentioned in a thread back in Oct. Went out with a guy for a first time who was way too touchy-feely and I did not like it. I just came out and told him I was not comfortable with all his touching for it having been the first couple hours together (and he was really touching, way too affectionate for a first time out), he came back with his sing-sing that is just how he is, blah blah - and I told him to just please stop til I got to know him for at least another couple hours (ha) - twice I think. He ended the night by asking me if I wanted to smoke a joint (gee, wonder why), I said no again. He never called me back again. That made me happy.
yeah, I guess so. These haven't been bf's. my ex bf and I touched a "normal" amount, we could sit and cuddle, relax to watch tv, or we could lay head to foot on the couch and just kind of have our hands on each others legs or something. We didn't have to necessarily be stroking each other, etc. you know what I mean?
but, I wouldn't want to sit in different chairs! that's kind of blah!! now, I have sat on the floor with my bf on the couch or vice versa, that wasn't a problem, maybe my arm was draped over his leg or whatever.
Quote:
Originally Posted by stan4
If it bothers you that much, it sounds like what you need is someone who prefers the same level of contact that you do. Everyone's different. I had one ex who would never sit down and cuddle to watch tv...we had to sit in different chairs! I didn't like that and it wound up being one of the deal-breakers.
A lot of women are asking for more of this casual contact from men that you seem to be getting. Let the guys know what you prefer and if they need/want more, y'all can go your separate ways.
Please register to post and access all features of our very popular forum. It is free and quick. Over $68,000 in prizes has already been given out to active posters on our forum. Additional giveaways are planned.
Detailed information about all U.S. cities, counties, and zip codes on our site: City-data.com.
Please register to participate in our discussions with 2 million other members - it's free and quick! Some forums can only be seen by registered members. After you create your account, you'll be able to customize options and access all our 15,000 new posts/day with fewer ads.
, I don't mind the usual amount, but really, if I'm trying to watch a show/game, or cook, or something, it gets a little bothersome!
