Silent treatment makes me INSANE! (soulmates, how to, girl, love)
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I need some help and advice, I'm feeling lost, alone and broken.
I have a relationship of almost 2 years, which in my opinion was a soulmate. Te love between us was so unique and strong. It was real love and also a best friend. I can sense that he still loves me. We did everything together and were a team. I thought I was a strong person until I discovered how weak love can make you
There have been many issues between us and yet I have always been loyal. I have taken care of him in every way I could, wherever I can. I have supported him financially at a difficult time. Supported him and helped him with personal issues he has
I supported him always on his emotional wellbeing and his feelings, issues. He treated me nicely,
Yet his personal problems have taken on our relationship.
He was also a little bit insecure of hiself because of some issues he has
He doesn't manage to communicate normally, he isn't clear and I noticed that he couldn't empathise with my feelings and needs
I do NOT ask for much! Only support me mentally and emotionally, be there for me.. listen.. support my needs as I ALWAYS did for you… And we were growing a bit apart
We had a discussion last friday
We had said some things to each other out of anger
But I had always been respectful to him
Suddenly he stood up and grabbed his things and walked away, angry.
I thought okay I let him cool off a lil bit
I tried to call him the next day, no answer or response
and then, he continued to give me the silent treatment
He has seen all my messages but refuses answer or communicate
He sucks all the energy out of me I havent slept for days
After that I sent him a lot of messages to make up
I even went to his house but he does not open the door for me
When he didn't open the door, it felt like a sting in my heart
But what did I actually do wrong?
On the third day he sent me a short message that he needed some time.
I asked, thats oke how long? My birthday is also next week and we made plans
His answer was on the fourth day only: ”i am gone for one month, i feel lost and broken”
I was so hurted en begged him through message to pick his phone up to talk
Yes he can take time, but not to speak to me for 1 month
He also skips my birthday which is about to happen!
He doesn't ask for my feelings, he doesn't ask if I am ok
He doesn't call me, or checks up on me how I am doing
It is all about him
The silent treatment made me insane
To this day I have not heard anything and I know he is going to persevere.
I also know that he is not going to congratulate me.
And this is not the eesrte times he gives me the cold silent treatment
Previous amand this also happened but perhaps for 3 days
But why should I beg for clarity? Why should I beg for communication?
He knows that I am going to break down. He knows how to make me crazy
Because I told him last time what it do to me
and of course he knows me very well
And my birthday is also next week
I am broken
What is your advice?
Do I have to deal with emotional abuse or perhaps narcissism?
Our problem now is so easy to solve
But he makes it enormously dramatic
Communciation is the key but he refuses it
The whole relationship actually runs on him…
I can not believe the betrayal and heart pain he gives me
The last message is sended him was I do not accept this behavior and I will not wait. Goodbye”
I have decided not to call or text him, it feels like he is punishing me
What should I do? I need advice. Thanks and sorry for the long story
!i need to pour my heart out. I am crying and not eating for days
Is this narcism? Why this emotional manipulation?
I need some help and advice, I'm feeling lost, alone and broken.
I have a relationship of almost 2 years, which in my opinion was a soulmate. Te love between us was so unique and strong. It was real love and also a best friend. I can sense that he still loves me. We did everything together and were a team. I thought I was a strong person until I discovered how weak love can make you
There have been many issues between us and yet I have always been loyal. I have taken care of him in every way I could, wherever I can. I have supported him financially at a difficult time. Supported him and helped him with personal issues he has
I supported him always on his emotional wellbeing and his feelings, issues. He treated me nicely,
Yet his personal problems have taken on our relationship.
He was also a little bit insecure of hiself because of some issues he has
He doesn't manage to communicate normally, he isn't clear and I noticed that he couldn't empathise with my feelings and needs
I do NOT ask for much! Only support me mentally and emotionally, be there for me.. listen.. support my needs as I ALWAYS did for you… And we were growing a bit apart
We had a discussion last friday
We had said some things to each other out of anger
But I had always been respectful to him
Suddenly he stood up and grabbed his things and walked away, angry.
I thought okay I let him cool off a lil bit
I tried to call him the next day, no answer or response
and then, he continued to give me the silent treatment
He has seen all my messages but refuses answer or communicate
He sucks all the energy out of me I havent slept for days
After that I sent him a lot of messages to make up
I even went to his house but he does not open the door for me
When he didn't open the door, it felt like a sting in my heart
But what did I actually do wrong?
On the third day he sent me a short message that he needed some time.
I asked, thats oke how long? My birthday is also next week and we made plans
His answer was on the fourth day only: ”i am gone for one month, i feel lost and broken”
I was so hurted en begged him through message to pick his phone up to talk
Yes he can take time, but not to speak to me for 1 month
He also skips my birthday which is about to happen!
He doesn't ask for my feelings, he doesn't ask if I am ok
He doesn't call me, or checks up on me how I am doing
It is all about him
The silent treatment made me insane
To this day I have not heard anything and I know he is going to persevere.
I also know that he is not going to congratulate me.
And this is not the eesrte times he gives me the cold silent treatment
Previous amand this also happened but perhaps for 3 days
But why should I beg for clarity? Why should I beg for communication?
He knows that I am going to break down. He knows how to make me crazy
Because I told him last time what it do to me
and of course he knows me very well
And my birthday is also next week
I am broken
What is your advice?
Do I have to deal with emotional abuse or perhaps narcissism?
Our problem now is so easy to solve
But he makes it enormously dramatic
Communciation is the key but he refuses it
The whole relationship actually runs on him…
I have decided not to call or text him, it feels like he is punishing me
What should I do? I need advice. Thanks and sorry for the long story
!i need to pour my heart out. I am crying and not eating for days
I can not believe the betrayal and heart pain he gives me The last message is sended him was I do not accept this behavior and I will not wait. Goodbye”
Well, you've already decided.
You obviously weren't soulmates, and there obviously were a lot of problems present. He is showing you how he deals with conflict.
The silent treatment is about control. It is an effort to get the upper hand in a conflict. It is a technique used by someone who cares more about winning than loving.
You obviously weren't soulmates, and there obviously were a lot of problems present. He is showing you how he deals with conflict.
The silent treatment is about control. It is an effort to get the upper hand in a conflict. It is a technique used by someone who cares more about winning than loving.
The problem is that I don't really know what I said that made him so angry. We were talking about our relationship troubles, and that we need to work on things.. For our own sake. Guess the pressure was too much..or he can't handle the truth.
The problem is that I don't really know what I said that made him so angry. We were talking about our relationship troubles, and that we need to work on things.. For our own sake. Guess the pressure was too much..or he can't handle the truth.
Maybe so.
You need to stop contacting him and let him have the space he says he needs. If you never get closure, you will have to find a way to deal with that.
But if he comes back and wants to be BF/GF again, I would not accept this kind of thing AT ALL.
I have already accepted it once, and it has been repeated, while he said he is never going to do it again in this way. I am afraid he will keep repeating that. If I give him a month, I fear that nothing will change. He does not even care about my feelings. He does not take that time for space, he does this to make me crazy I think. I try to understand if it is narcissistic/manipulating or not.. My mind is so confused. I still love him, but I cannot believe that he treat me this way and it hurts so much.
I do NOT ask for much! Only support me mentally and emotionally, be there for me.. listen.. support my needs as I ALWAYS did for you… And we were growing a bit apart
We had a discussion last friday
We had said some things to each other out of anger
But I had always been respectful to him
Suddenly he stood up and grabbed his things and walked away, angry.
I thought okay I let him cool off a lil bit
I tried to call him the next day, no answer or response THIS IS WHERE YOU SHOULD HAVE STOPPED.
and then, he continued to give me the silent treatment
He has seen all my messages but refuses answer or communicate
He sucks all the energy out of me I havent slept for days
After that I sent him a lot of messages to make up NO NO NO Dont ever do that again
I even went to his house but he does not open the door for me Dont!
When he didn't open the door, it felt like a sting in my heart
But what did I actually do wrong? SEE ABOVE! You are too much. He needed space and you became needy.
On the third day he sent me a short message that he needed some time.
I asked, thats oke how long? My birthday is also next week and we made plans
His answer was on the fourth day only: ”i am gone for one month, i feel lost and broken”
I was so hurted en begged him through message to pick his phone up to talk DONT EVER BEG
Yes he can take time, but not to speak to me for 1 month
He also skips my birthday which is about to happen!
He doesn't ask for my feelings, he doesn't ask if I am ok
He doesn't call me, or checks up on me how I am doing
It is all about him
The silent treatment made me insane
To this day I have not heard anything and I know he is going to persevere.
I also know that he is not going to congratulate me.
And this is not the eesrte times he gives me the cold silent treatment
Previous amand this also happened but perhaps for 3 days
But why should I beg for clarity? Why should I beg for communication? DONT BEG
He knows that I am going to break down. He knows how to make me crazy
Because I told him last time what it do to me
and of course he knows me very well
And my birthday is also next week
I am broken
What is your advice?
Do I have to deal with emotional abuse or perhaps narcissism?
Our problem now is so easy to solve
But he makes it enormously dramatic
Communciation is the key but he refuses it
The whole relationship actually runs on him…
I can not believe the betrayal and heart pain he gives me
The last message is sended him was I do not accept this behavior and I will not wait. Goodbye”
I have decided not to call or text him, it feels like he is punishing me
What should I do? I need advice. Thanks and sorry for the long story
!i need to pour my heart out. I am crying and not eating for days
Is this narcism? Why this emotional manipulation?
I put in red what you did wrong. DO NOT EVER BEG for a guy it causes the opposite of what you try to achieve. Send one message, maybe apologize if appropriate and that's it. The ball is in his corner.
What he does is absolutely cruel. The silent treatment is horror and he knows it. He is punishing you and you are begging. A begging girl makes herself look needy and annoying. No guy likes that.
Please stick with your "GOOD BYE" and block his number. That's the only way to can get your dignity back. If he comes back after a month and you welcome him with open arms, he lost respect for you and will do it again next time you fight.
I have been there, done that. THat's my experience. He is very cold and does not care how you feel. That should tell you something. If he would care about you, he'll be there on your bday.
I am sorry you have to go through this. You deserve better.
I put in red what you did wrong. DO NOT EVER BEG for a guy it causes the opposite of what you try to achieve. Send one message, maybe apologize if appropriate and that's it. The ball is in his corner.
What he does is absolutely cruel. The silent treatment is horror and he knows it. He is punishing you and you are begging. A begging girl makes herself look needy and annoying. No guy likes that.
Please stick with your "GOOD BYE" and block his number. That's the only way to can get your dignity back. If he comes back after a month and you welcome him with open arms, he lost respect for you and will do it again next time you fight.
I have been there, done that. THat's my experience. He is very cold and does not care how you feel. That should tell you something. If he would care about you, he'll be there on your bday.
I am sorry you have to go through this. You deserve better.
Thanks a lot. Yes, I realized too late that I should'nt text him at all! I regret it so much and I am so ashamed of this. But his cold behavior towards me made me this way.. because I waited so long for a reply. I wanted to know what to expect. Tommorow is day 3 that I am not messaging or calling him. If i continue, would he worry about that? I am scared that he will run back after I ignore him for too long, because I do not know how to be strong and say goodbye forever. The love is so strong, thats why is hurts the most. He also lives 10 min. away from me. I still cannot believe that the person I loved the most, take care of the most hurt me in such a bad way. Do you think he is narcissistic? This is not a healthy way to deal with conflicts. He is 40 years but acts like a child.. And the worst part is he knows that this behavior drives me insane. He want me to believe that he is hurting, that that is the reason of his silence,but actually it is punishment I guess. I don't know.. Im confused.
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