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I hope in my case that this is not a true statement!! YIKES. My ex is a flaming drunk, smokes pot, did cheat on me too many times to count and left me for a married woman with a kid. He is 63 years old and is still a drunk and smokes pot! He has gone years without any contact with my son, and last summer when my son's grandfather passed away, the ex went home after the funeral to change his clothes and never came back to visit with his family or his son. My son had driven all the way up to maine to see his family up there and to attend the funeral. So, please pray for me like I do every day that my son does not turn out like this jerk. Right now the two of them are not speaking and I don't bring his father's name up at all. I do ask that he stay in touch with his 80 year old grandmother in Maine and he does do that. Not his Father though.
The strangest part of all this "stuff" with my sons Father is that there are times when my son has little gestures or cops an attitude that is so like his Father and having not been around him for any great length of time, it floors me when I see it. What's even stranger is that at times it makes me smile and I can't figure out why??!! Bizarre, yes but I guess gene pools are gene pools. Thank goodness my son also shows signs of my side of the gene pool as well.
So....do I believe "Like Father Like Son"? Not in all instances...I believe that being around that parent could make this be true but not in all cases!
So....do I believe "Like Father Like Son"? Not in all instances...I believe that being around that parent could make this be true but not in all cases!
I agree; while genetics influences some things in offspring, the cultural side is more important. And it sounds like you're providing a good culture for your sons.
Deep down yes I think the apple doesn't fall far from the tree. I think its interesting that people that grow up in a filthy home and become neat freaks think they are so different from their parents, both are extremes and both will have problems in relationships and only because it is such a large issue. I knew someone thats father was a drunk, the father would vanish for days when he got paid, when she grew up she didn't drink at all but she was such a fanatic about it that she ruined every relationship she had with men that had a drink now and then because in her mind they were drunks as well. People think they are so different from their parents when in reality they are either a close facsimile or just the other side of the coin.
is it true in your experience the apple doesn't fall far from the tree?
yes... but the only instances I've ever seen of guys being like their fathers were those whose fathers were wife-beating drunks...
(I am grateful to say I was never personally involved with them)...
however, along the line of your statement, "the apple not falling far from the tree" is more accurate in terms of guys following the influence of their mothers...
if a guy's mother did not treat him well when he was a boy, fortheloveofgod steer clear of him!!!
the old saying "a man is what his mother made him" is one of the most accurate statements I've ever heard.
I just asked Mrs. Chow if she thought I was like my Dad and she said mostly not.
I have a certain trait that is like him, otherwise were about as far apart as they get. He is a bonehead and I'm not. LOL , just kidding.
My relationship with my Dad has improved the last couple of years. We are so different in many ways. My dad is outgoing and full of bravado, while I'm quite and on the shy side. My dad's thinks all of the superficial crap is important. All of the things that society thinks are important such as going to college, getting the good job, buying a home, blah blah.
I did all of that stuff and did it way way younger than my Dad did. I think I got a lot of respect from him cause of that.
I think all of the society "markers" are BS, the important stuff in life is being a good guy,treating people with respect, enjoying your friends and family.
Status symbols, such as the big house and expensive cars just bore the shyt out of me. Or should I say the blind pursuit of said items.
is it true in your experience the apple doesn't fall far from the tree?
Depends on the relationship Apple, Jr. had with the apple tree. I haven't spoken to my Dad in about 4 years (I think) and barely did so in the 20 years before that. I can't think of a thing to say to him nor can I relate to him. After he left my Mom and the way he did it, if he's an apple then I'm an orange - and that's fine by me.
I think my brother is like my father in some ways: they look a bit alike (dark hair, dark eyes, tall, Italian features), they both like alcohol a bit too much, they share some weird mannerisms, ect. At the same time, I think they're pretty different (my father has a good work ethic, is an organized neat freak, isn't afraid to stand up for himself, is strong and kind of rugged. While my brother is a lazy bum, a packrat and unorganized mess, won't stand up for himself (or other people), is a scrawny little beanpole who can hardly lift half his weight). They're both really good cooks though, as my father taught my brother how to get around in the kitchen.
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Like Father Like Son
