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I think most women dont see the abuse coming. No one in their right mind would have even hooked up with someone in the first place if the guy was controlling, abusive. They start out charming, tender. After some time, the true colours come out. One little thing triggers them off and everything goes downhill from there. A lot of times, women, especially when you have kids, dont always have places to go. Sure, shelters are fine, but the guy will eventually find you. He knows the kid has to go to school He knows you have to work. And what do you do with the kids when youre at work. And he has family too. Get the picture?
Unfortunately, in some cases we wait till the damage is actually to the serious point to actually HAVE to find a way out. And you do.
I only hope she gets out before the abuse escalates. It took me a cracked rib, being pushed, being called names and degraded, controlled (he liked when I didnt work so I couldnt have any money to stash away) till finally it affected the kids and CPS stepped in and basically gave me an ultimatum. Dont let it get to that point!
Trouble is, with abuse, women too, are just as capable of abusing men too, and it does happen.
I've always said that any man who abuses a woman is not a man, he's nothing but a coward. Physical, or any other kind of abuse is never warranted, even if the woman has done a wrong.
Paws917, this should be a red flag for your niece because it started out as a push, it could gradually get worse.
I've always said that any man who abuses a woman is not man, he's nothing but a coward. Physical, or any other kind of abuse is never warranted, even if the woman has done a wrong.
Paws917, this should be a red flag for your niece because it started out as a push, it could gradually get worse.
ditto as usual mike is on target -- hammer to the nail
what is disturbing is that many women find such men exciting and attractive. 9 out of 10 times will go back to them even with intervention.
Last edited by Huckleberry3911948; 05-25-2009 at 09:50 PM..
On a legal sense they are pretty damn stupid since the laws are biased towards women as is. Unfortunately men do not have such protections. Their is a law called, "violence against women act." Women for the most part have been the ones advancing domestic violence laws and hence those laws are designed to protect women, not men. In reality, the law should protect ANY victim of domestic violence, equally, not just women.
She could get him arrested & destroy his life pretty quickly if she used the courts.
People who hit other people, male or female, are very stupid. Also it isn't just men who do the hitting, women hit men as well. About 40% of all domestic violence incidents are women hitting men. According to studies, women are more likey than men to use weapons during disputes like guns or knives. Likewise, women are more likely than men to initiate confrontations which may lead to violence. A man may physically harm a female but a female will kill you.
I think in olden times men would get together and "handle" these kind of things, long before f ing lawyers and courts.
I think any man that beats on women needs to have the shyt kicked out of him. I understand how husbands and wives fight and sometimes things get heated.
Agreed, but let me also add that women shouldn't hit men either, its only right.
On a legal sense they are pretty damn stupid since the laws are biased towards women as is. Unfortunately men do not have such protections. Their is a law called, "violence against women act." Women for the most part have been the ones advancing domestic violence laws and hence those laws are designed to protect women, not men. In reality, the law should protect ANY victim of domestic violence, equally, not just women.
She could get him arrested & destroy his life pretty quickly if she used the courts.
People who hit other people, male or female, are very stupid. Also it isn't just men who do the hitting, women hit men as well. According to studies, women are more likey than men to use weapons during disputes like guns or knives. Likewise, women are more likely than men to initiate confrontations which may lead to violence. A man may physically harm a female but a female will kill you.
fyi as currently taught in mandated CPS parenting classes in this county----domestic violence is 50/50 male/female and a woman is 4 1/2 times more prone to use a weapon in a confrontation. this reverses what was taught in the same classes 12 years ago by the same county .
On a legal sense they are pretty damn stupid since the laws are biased towards women as is. Unfortunately men do not have such protections. Their is a law called, "violence against women act." Women for the most part have been the ones advancing domestic violence laws and hence those laws are designed to protect women, not men. In reality, the law should protect ANY victim of domestic violence, equally, not just women.
The law does protect men from violence, not as many report it because of the embarassment they attach to it.
Quote:
She could get him arrested & destroy his life pretty quickly if she used the courts.
HE could get himself arrested by hitting her. Or does she owe him the courtesy of not calling the cops on him? You'd be happy to know that many women don't.
Quote:
According to studies, women are more likey than men to use weapons during disputes like guns or knives. A man may physically harm a female but a female will kill you.
They are more likely to use weapons because they cannot physically defend themselves against [ETA: or abuse, if that is the case] someone stronger and bigger than them. And many women have died at the hands of their abusers and stalkers, most of whom were former intimates. If you are going to quote studies, quote it all and not just what serves to promote further hatred towards women.
Oh yea and that above case ended up being thrown out, even with a confession. Can you believe that?
She deserves to go to jail, but where did you read that the case was thrown out of court?
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The law does protect men from violence, not as many report it because of the embarassment they attach to it.
