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After some of the comments I've heard from both of my female and men friends in regards to marriage,I think it's a loud wake up call to either sex whose goal is to hopefully one day find a man/woman to form a relationship leading to marriage.The reality seems to be alot of my men /women friends have been burnt from previous marriage/marriages and in no way are going there again.So I guess it's come down to long term dating for them.
Many claim that singleville is the way to go,they've been there done that so either sex is just to much trouble,to much nagging,not feminine enough or not manly enough,too overweight etc,the list goes on and on of the inferiorities.So with some saying thay can't find anybody worthwhile in a sea of women and men and others saying the heck with marriage I guess things have gotten a whole lot harder.
I don't believe a thing when someone say they do not want to get marry.........it's just they have not found "that one person" yet...........i understand the fear of failure, but i believe that at some point, we date with the hope of marriage
The problem is we have a 65% divorce rate and people are conditioned to think that marriages will fail. The truth is marriages fail because of selfishness and stubborness more then anything. Those are the personality traits that are most common in most marriages today. They think that once their are in love marriage will be a piece of cake. Flash alert to both genders!!!! You have to work hard to keep the love strong.
I can only second the idea relationships take WORK and the willingness to care for someone equal to yourself. Marriage can be fun, I have seen it and would love to find it for myself. Not actively looking but willing to consider the possibility if the time comes....
I agree with myPOv. Everybody wants to get settle down in life...
Allow me to introduce myself as the one exception to the rule, then. I don't want to date again or get married again or "settle down." I'm only 38 so hopefully there's a lot of life ahead of me and who knows how things will turn out. I'm not "militantly single." But yeah...I don't have any plans to date and when I think about my future, a husband does not factor into the picture at all. I'd rather be that old lady everybody knows who is busy and active and has a full life and tons of friends and travels and volunteers and wears wacky eyeglasses and laughs loud and tells dirty jokes and takes her dog with her everywhere she goes.
I agree with Nifty. Perhaps the majority of young never married do hope to settle down one day, but many who have been thru a divorce or two are more than happy to stay unsettled.
I want to get married, but just not to American women. They all more or less have the same snobbiness, lack of sophistication and charm, and strong sense of undeserved entitlement in all of them.
So yeah, I'll get married, but getting married to an American woman is a disaster waiting to happen.
While growing up I always dreamt of being a wife and mother.When I became 18 my dreams came true or so I thought.My 1st husband was very abusive so I divorced him.
After that bad experience I swore I'd never get married again but later on in my late 30's I met another man who was good to me and we were married and this September we would've celebrated our 28th wedding anniversary but because of his passing that won't be possible.
Two years have gone by since my late husband's passing on and I've since met a very wonderful man who I love very very much but we have made no marriage plans.We've known one another going on 3 yrs now and are very happy with one another and how our relationship is going.
Perhaps the majority of young never married do hope to settle down one day, but many who have been thru a divorce or two are more than happy to stay unsettled.
I have a few reasons I don't want to date or settle down again, but one of those reasons is because -- frankly -- I really don't want to accommodate another person that way. If that makes me selfish, so be it.
I watch my parents, who have been married for 21 years, and I think, "I wouldn't want to do that!" My mom has to accommodate my dad; my dad has to accommodate my mom. Drives them both nuts. Oh, I know they love each other, and I think that they're happy together. But I also know -- because I listen to her rant -- that my dad causes some real grief for my mother. Hassles and headaches. And sometimes he just flat-out ticks her off. It drives her nuts that he's incapable of shutting a cabinet door or drawer or picking up after himself or helping out in any signficant way around the house and yard. My mother has become a handy-man because she's had to. It drives my dad nuts that my mom will be in bed, three feet away from the door, and call my father to come in from another room to let their dog out to go potty. And sometimes they have real problems that go beyond the petty stuff...like when my father refused to pay the insurance bill because it hadn't come, even though he KNEW it was due. So rather than call and find out what was going on, he just refused to pay until he had a real paper statement in his hand...and then they canceled my mother's health-insurance for non-payment...right before she went into the hospital for pneumonia. I just wouldn't want to deal with crap like that.
My brother and his wife have been married for 10 years, and while I'm around their marriage less often, it sure seems to me that my sister-in-law has to be a saint to put up with and accommodate my brother.
I'm sure that there are perks and bennies that come with marriage. I wouldn't look at my parents or my brother and SIL and say they have "bad" marriages. (I had a "bad" marriage. I know the difference!) But I've been single now for 5 years, and I love it more every day. I like the fact that I don't have to accommodate anyone. Again...maybe that makes me selfish, but I don't think so. "Selfish" would be if I didn't want to accommodate others, and knew that about myself, but I put myself out there in the dating scene anyway. Just as I don't want to accommodate a "signficant other," I don't expect anyone to have to accommodate me.
Unless you live in a cave somewhere far removed from human life, you can be as "connected" with others as you want to be. I have friends I hang out with. I have activities that keep me engaged and entertained, and I'm willing and able to go off on my own and do stuff. *shrug* Works for me!
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