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First of all I am probably not in the typical age bracket that does Threads on this forum (me/60-wife/61). Anyway here is what happened:
I had a really weird dream last night and this morning I decided to tell my wife about it. The first thing I did was to turn the dream around like she was the one who had it and was telling me about it. I just felt better doing it that way. Anyway, after putting her in my dream, instead of me, she understood. Now, the dream: I was in bed with my ex-wife, whom I haven't seen in 30 years, and we had sex. How I wound up in bed with my ex-wife was not in the dream. The sexual part was very non-exciting for either of us. The next part of the dream was that I seen my ex sitting next to a guy that was much heavier than me, had a beard, long hair w/ponytail. Have no idea who he was! While looking at my ex and this guy, I thought to myself "she doesn't really look like ****" (my ex's name). The last part of the dream, I was driving behind her and this guy (they were in a van). On the back window was a Team Roping sticker (I did spend some years in that event in rodeo) and a sticker that said Pro Rodeo on it. I went around them and made a right turn into a parking lot and they kept going straight. I woke up!
In the 9 1/2 years we've been together, I have always wanted the communication to be good between us, and it has been. I am happily married and so is my ex (from a letter from my daughter). I told my wife that I love her very much and have no idea where this dream came from. She understood and that was the end of our conversation about the dream.
So, if you were to have a dream like this, would you be able to tell your spouse about it?
I would be able to tell my husband. My question is, why would I want to?
It was a dream. I don't believe all dreams have a meaning, they just are. Telling my husband about a dream in which I had sex with someone else would be hurtful. I would never do it. If I had a similar dream, I would probably have awakened, laughed or said "Huh?" to myself and gone on with my day.
Of course when I have dreams of my ex it usually involves some kind of fight. Not something I like to dream about. I believe that's a nightmare.
First of all I am probably not in the typical age bracket that does Threads on this forum (me/60-wife/61). Anyway here is what happened:
I had a really weird dream last night and this morning I decided to tell my wife about it. The first thing I did was to turn the dream around like she was the one who had it and was telling me about it. I just felt better doing it that way. Anyway, after putting her in my dream, instead of me, she understood. Now, the dream: I was in bed with my ex-wife, whom I haven't seen in 30 years, and we had sex. How I wound up in bed with my ex-wife was not in the dream. The sexual part was very non-exciting for either of us. The next part of the dream was that I seen my ex sitting next to a guy that was much heavier than me, had a beard, long hair w/ponytail. Have no idea who he was! While looking at my ex and this guy, I thought to myself "she doesn't really look like ****" (my ex's name). The last part of the dream, I was driving behind her and this guy (they were in a van). On the back window was a Team Roping sticker (I did spend some years in that event in rodeo) and a sticker that said Pro Rodeo on it. I went around them and made a right turn into a parking lot and they kept going straight. I woke up!
In the 9 1/2 years we've been together, I have always wanted the communication to be good between us, and it has been. I am happily married and so is my ex (from a letter from my daughter). I told my wife that I love her very much and have no idea where this dream came from. She understood and that was the end of our conversation about the dream.
So, if you were to have a dream like this, would you be able to tell your spouse about it?
Uh, yeah I could. But I highly doubt I'd tell it like he was the one it was happening to instead of me - that's kinda weird
She was happy that I told her! Actually, I wasn't sure if I should tell her, then I thought about and decided to. She took it exactly the way I thought she would........as being an honest "this is what I dreamed about" type of communication. Nothing more.
Quote:
Originally Posted by VBmom
I would be able to tell my husband. My question is, why would I want to?
It was a dream. I don't believe all dreams have a meaning, they just are. Telling my husband about a dream in which I had sex with someone else would be hurtful. I would never do it. If I had a similar dream, I would probably have awakened, laughed or said "Huh?" to myself and gone on with my day.
Of course when I have dreams of my ex it usually involves some kind of fight. Not something I like to dream about. I believe that's a nightmare.
I done that just so she could understand better how I felt about the dream. In putting her into "my place" I wanted her to see that it was somewhat awkward for me to tell her about the dream. She understood.
Quote:
Originally Posted by lovesMountains
Uh, yeah I could. But I highly doubt I'd tell it like he was the one it was happening to instead of me - that's kinda weird
My primary goal of this Thread is to let couples know that, if the communication is very good in the marriage, even a weird sexual dream can be talked about without any jealousy or anger getting into the conversation.
We have no problem telling each other these kinds of dreams. We just turn it into a joke or something. The very fact that we tell each other kind of takes any importance or seriousness out of it. Glad you guys are fine with it!
I guess it is good when people can share like that and not get angry... personally I do not want to know what kind of sex w/ex dreams my husband has. I am surely not going to tell him mine.
It was just a dream, but I felt like I wanted to tell her about it anyway. Actually, I was sort of laughing while telling her about it!
Heck, I told my wife when a couple of different ladies called me "Baby" and "Honey" (living North Carolina or north Florida that can/will happen) and how uncomfortable I was with it. One of the ladies (who is 28 yrs old) is on the Management Staff at our apartment complex. She is married with a couple of kids and told me "the Corporate office tells us not to say "Honey" to tenants, but it's just the way I talk".
We don't talk about our previous sex lives (before we met each other) because we know that we did have a sex life before we met each other.
One of the keys to a great marriage is good-to-great communication. Actually this "communication" thing is part of boyfriend/girlfriend and engagement relationships as well.
I would be able to tell my husband. My question is, why would I want to?
It was a dream. I don't believe all dreams have a meaning, they just are. Telling my husband about a dream in which I had sex with someone else would be hurtful. I would never do it. If I had a similar dream, I would probably have awakened, laughed or said "Huh?" to myself and gone on with my day.
Of course when I have dreams of my ex it usually involves some kind of fight. Not something I like to dream about. I believe that's a nightmare.
Quote:
Originally Posted by DixieChick1972
I guess it is good when people can share like that and not get angry... personally I do not want to know what kind of sex w/ex dreams my husband has. I am surely not going to tell him mine.
I can also understand people choosing not to discuss it. It's not like you're cheating or anything.
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Glad you guys are fine with it!
