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I have seen comments on here how someone who is older and never been in a longterm relationship is suppose to be a red flag. But do all people believe this? I mean am I doomed to never being in a relationship again because I am 40 and my longest relationship was 8 months? I just feel in my younger years I made a lot of mistakes in who I dated. Found myself with several alcoholics, mental cases and cheaters. I used to date anyone who would date me. But I grew up and learned my lesson. Aren't we all mostly naive in our youth and have to learn?
I've not dated in 6 years or so. I honestly don't recall exactly how many years. And to be honest there were many times when I ignored what might have been flirting because I didn't want a relationship because I was busy growing spiritually and finding out who I really am. Also I have just been too busy for years working lots of overtime, working evening shift and weekends and having health problems so I lost out on a lot of years of socializing. I mean if your free time is M-F from 8am-2pm that really limits who you can hang out with to the retired or non-working for the most part. The people on same shift as me were over a decade younger and most in college so its not like they wanted to hang out with me or date nor had the time to with going to school. So now I find myself in a pickle. There's not a whole lot for 40-ish people in my town to do to meet others because its a college town and over half the population is under 23. I plan to move away from here because I dislike the town and the weather etc. But I worry regardless of where I live are people going to all look at me as some kind of loser and possible nutcase just because I never met someone who wanted a long term relationship with me?
i never ask a girl about her past relationships and rarely ever get asked about mine
My back-then gf was concerned since I hadn't had a real long term relationship. She was afraid I could not commit. Today she's my wife and she has no thoughts of me being afraid to commit.
Sometimes people meet the wrong type for them and some don't really get a chance to be seen for who they really are.
Before my wife, I did have a relationship. If that actually had gone further, I think I would have shot myself. Bad choice I made, good choice to break it off.
No one will never know you haven't had a long term relationship unless you tell them. I don't think it's a red flag at all. You've dated in the past, but haven't met a person you want to commit to. There's nothing wrong with that. Put yourself out there, talk to people, get involved in activities you enjoy, and when you meet someone who interests you, ask them out. No one can change the past, but you are in charge of your future and can make it what you want it to be. Best wishes.
i never ask a girl about her past relationships and rarely ever get asked about mine
Really? Because everyone I've ever dated as demanded to know about past relationships, how long and how many times sex, etc. What have I just dated really nosey people?
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