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hi my nickname is brooke. I have a nice voice that can melt your heart. I dance - Salsa and Samba are my favorite. Economics and art are my passion.
I am looking for a guy:
- taller than 5'10''
- employed, if you have your own profitable business, you get an extra point
- has a bachelor degree or above; or a designation will do (CFA, CMA, CA, etc)
- down-to-earth and romantic: yes, they can co-exist. A bunch of flowers is always a good start.
- has a car
- has an interest in life and the world: you read news, you take efforts to make life interesting.
- short hair, if you are bald, I am perfectly fine with it
- loving and affectionate. I am comfortable being given a lot of affection
- a sense of humor. I don't drink, so only laughters make me high.
- you don't take yourself too seriously. you dance even though you know you are not a good dancer; you don't have to be perfect, but you are confident and know it is ok to not be perfect.
- if you are persistent and a bit bold ,that's good. I think it is musculinity.
- I like you take the lead. but also let me make the decision when it matters my life.
- you don't have to be good looking, but you dress well.
- I am not a big camper. you can go camping with your guy friends, and I can give you a massage when you come back.
- honest. I am good at the card game "Bluff", so honesty is your best policy
to be continued
I thank you for messaging me, but only the qualified will be messaged back. So to save your precious time, only message me if you meet the above criteria.
Alright, here's my take. I've helped a few friends write profiles for Sugar Daddy dating sites (although I understand that's not what you're looking for, but still. . . the profile has to be very catching to get the eye of the SD) so I have a small amount of experience under my belt.
You need to give your profile an entire makeover. Cut out all the blunt demands. Those don't work over well with guys. Your tone is demanding, condescending, and borderline arrogant. Especially that last sentence (only the qualified. . . if you meet the above criteria). I can guarantee that will turn off every decent guy on that website. Don't mention your height requirement. Just don't message back the guys that are shorties and you're problem will be alleviated. Get rid of all your check-list requirements. Make everything much more personal. Guys don't want to feel like they're being interviewed for a job position. Don't mention him having a car. While I understand your desire, any mention of wanting a guy to have a particular possession instantly rings off the "shallow" bell in online dating profiles.
You need to talk about yourself. Use actions rather than descriptions. (Ex: Don't say I love to travel. Do say I've traveled from Ireland to South Africa (and have the stories to tell), but can't decide whether swimming in the Great Barrier Reef or strolling the days away in Italy is my favorite memory.) Talk about what you have to offer a man in an indirect way. Online dating profiles are basically marketing. You must market yourself. What type of guy are you trying to attract? Make your profile to attract that guy. And no man likes a selfish beyotch, except for a quick hook-up if she's bearably hot.
Here's an example of how you could rephrase your "requirements":
I'm attracted to men with a passion for life and who have a romantic streak - someone that enjoys both witty banter and lazy cuddle sessions in bed.
You've just stated that you want a guy who has interests in life, can be romantic, enjoys fun conversation, and likes to be affectionate.
I'm attracted to men with a passion for life and who have a romantic streak - someone that enjoys both witty banter and lazy cuddle sessions in bed.
That seems canned, and I think that most men would assume that most women want that. She is going after Alpha Males if I read that correctly. More or less, you just need to come off as fun and interesting. Forget even listing any requirements...just be fun, honest, genuine and interesting. You'll get tons of responses and you can weed them from there. Just make sure to either be polite or don't comment to ones you don't like. You don't want bad karma.
Keep it to about 150 words and put your most important stuff first and last. I learned this in a business class I took once...but men in particular skim stuff. They read the first and last sentences. When I thought about, heck I do do that. Then I go back and read it through if I am intrested. Use lots of adverbs and adjectives. Get a good mental image painted. If you aren't interesting, you can't attract interesting.
That seems canned, and I think that most men would assume that most women want that. She is going after Alpha Males if I read that correctly. More or less, you just need to come off as fun and interesting. Forget even listing any requirements...just be fun, honest, genuine and interesting. You'll get tons of responses and you can weed them from there. Just make sure to either be polite or don't comment to ones you don't like. You don't want bad karma.
It seems canned because it's a canned example lol. Fun and interesting are definitely the way to go, but also a hint of depth can turn an average profile into a great way. An entertaining writing style is also helpful. You want the profile to stand out from the others in a good way.
If she wants an Alpha Male, then she's going to have to lose the overly prissy and selfish attitude.
Seeking a women who is pretty with pretty feet and lives in a nice neighborhood and has her own place and no kids. Someone who loves to watch old Tv comedy and football.
Seeking a women who is pretty with pretty feet and lives in a nice neighborhood and has her own place and no kids. Someone who loves to watch old Tv comedy and football.
hi my nickname is brooke. I have a nice voice that can melt your heart. I dance - Salsa and Samba are my favorite. Economics and art are my passion.
I am looking for a guy:
- taller than 5'10''
- employed, if you have your own profitable business, you get an extra point
- has a bachelor degree or above; or a designation will do (CFA, CMA, CA, etc)
- down-to-earth and romantic: yes, they can co-exist. A bunch of flowers is always a good start.
- has a car
- has an interest in life and the world: you read news, you take efforts to make life interesting.
- short hair, if you are bald, I am perfectly fine with it
- loving and affectionate. I am comfortable being given a lot of affection
- a sense of humor. I don't drink, so only laughters make me high.
- you don't take yourself too seriously. you dance even though you know you are not a good dancer; you don't have to be perfect, but you are confident and know it is ok to not be perfect.
- if you are persistent and a bit bold ,that's good. I think it is musculinity.
- I like you take the lead. but also let me make the decision when it matters my life.
- you don't have to be good looking, but you dress well.
- I am not a big camper. you can go camping with your guy friends, and I can give you a massage when you come back.
- honest. I am good at the card game "Bluff", so honesty is your best policy
to be continued
I thank you for messaging me, but only the qualified will be messaged back. So to save your precious time, only message me if you meet the above criteria.
The biggest problem I see with this is it tells me a lot about what you want, but not a lot about who you are. What you need to do more of is tell people who you are and not what you want from them. Think about it from the guy's perspective...After reading this profile an examining himself a guy might think "Oh I meet all those requirements...I wonder who this person is?" So they re-read the profile and find out the following things.
You like Salsa and Samba dancing.
You claim to have a nice voice (which is more or less subjective).
You like Economics + art (which can mean many things)
You do not like camping or drinking.
That is not a lot to go on especially considering a guy meeting those requirements probably has a lot of options and if you are asking about things like owning a profitable business and car before you even meet them that raises all sorts of red flags every where. Your profile should stress your own qualities as much or more then it stresses what you want. Once you get some potential suitors then you can start weeding them out.
Last edited by Randomstudent; 03-06-2010 at 11:49 PM..
I don't think the OP is serious. To be honest I wish women would stop writing all these long winded profiles. Seriously post about 10 hot pics (preferrably in a bikini or skimpy outfit ), a 50 word description of yourself and save the rest for the first date, jeez!
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