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This is my first time typing and this forum stuff as well so here it goes. I have been with my girl for 17 years now and now everything i do she complains about it. this started noticing this 3 years ago but it was normal ithought but now it's so bad that that the only reason for her complaining about everything i do is that she dont love me anymore and hates me. Every time i have brought this up she gets very upset and says im just paranoid and to stop trying to be a victim. which really trips me out cause i thought i was just telling her how feel.
This is my first time typing and this forum stuff as well so here it goes. I have been with my girl for 17 years now and now everything i do she complains about it. this started noticing this 3 years ago but it was normal ithought but now it's so bad that that the only reason for her complaining about everything i do is that she dont love me anymore and hates me. Every time i have brought this up she gets very upset and says im just paranoid and to stop trying to be a victim. which really trips me out cause i thought i was just telling her how feel.
I'm sorry, but that is just a terrible way to express your feelings. You'll immediately make anyone feel attacked, if you put things that way.
You should sit down with her, and let her know how she is treating you, makes you feel. Then you can work on a solution to change it. You might need to work on changing some of the things that you are doing, that she is complaining about. It's not complicated, but it will take some work.
Maybe you two are together and havent broken up because you are use to being with someone. Maybe its time you seriously think about if she is the person you really want to spend the rest of your life with. To me it sounds like you 2 are not happy together. I recently parted ways with my significant other after 5 years. It still hurts but it was the right decision. I am sure we will both be happier in the long run.
I was like you. She did nothing but ***** and moan for no reason. I tried to talk to her about it but she would ***** and moan even louder. Ignoring each other was common as was not speaking to each other for weeks at a time.
I eventually just said F it and moved on.
Oh and I recently found an awesome girl who i really like with no drama at all. Wouldnt have found her if i was stuck in my miserable relationship.
when you say complain, what do you mean? about your habits? interests?
sit down with her, and ask her what the problem is. if the problem is something you cannot change, or something you're not willing to change, then either you have to manage around it, or accomodate.
When you do ____, I feel ___. Be honest. But don't be brutal. Stick to the topic. Pick the ONE thing she does that upsets you, and be SPECIFIC aboiut the one thing she does and just as specific about how it makes you feel -- sad, angry, hurt.
When you do ____, I feel ___. Be honest. But don't be brutal. Stick to the topic. Pick the ONE thing she does that upsets you, and be SPECIFIC aboiut the one thing she does and just as specific about how it makes you feel -- sad, angry, hurt.
You must have went to the same relationship counselor, I went to?
What is it that she's complaining about? Is there any truth to what she's saying? For example, if you toss a wet towel on the floor after taking a shower and she complains, then she has a legitimate gripe. If she complains because the towel is wet after you just dried yourself off coming out of the shower, she doesn't have a legitimate gripe. She's been complaining for three years, have you been able to reach a compromise on anything? Is there anything about her that you complain about? Anything you'd like to see her work on? Talk it out.
This is my first time typing and this forum stuff as well so here it goes. I have been with my girl for 17 years now and now everything i do she complains about it. this started noticing this 3 years ago but it was normal ithought but now it's so bad that that the only reason for her complaining about everything i do is that she dont love me anymore and hates me. Every time i have brought this up she gets very upset and says im just paranoid and to stop trying to be a victim. which really trips me out cause i thought i was just telling her how feel.
I know if I were acting this way towards my SO, it's on the way to being over.
If she interrupts you or won't listen without blowing it off. I would suggest sending her an email/write it down. That way you have expressed how you feel without it going off course.
when you say complain, what do you mean? about your habits? interests?
sit down with her, and ask her what the problem is. if the problem is something you cannot change, or something you're not willing to change, then either you have to manage around it, or accomodate.
what i mean is we have three children and the only mess she complains about are only mine. I have always wanted to play the drums so i finally bought a set of drums and understand how annoying they could be especially when your first learning so when I'm playing its unbearable for her but when one of our kids play them it is not a problem. any advice i have to offer is not good but in the same day she could get the same advice from someone else and all of a sudden its good
Where is RUGGED with a youtube link for BB King's "The Thrill is Gone"? Sounds like the first 14 years was a thrill, the last three, not so much.
Can you think of anything that happened three years ago when the complaining started? Something that could have sparked her off?
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