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What if it's the wife and she won't do it? Used to years ago but refuses now. What would you suggest for the man? I guess this is off topic but I'm curious.
Guess it happens. But then she shouldn't expect any either.
What if it's the wife and she won't do it? Used to years ago but refuses now. What would you suggest for the man? I guess this is off topic but I'm curious.
Yeah, I think that's another topic, b/c the point here is that she's not willing to please him in the very most beginning stages of a relationship, the time when most people give their all to make it work. Assuming that they want to of course.
Your wife is sure of you now, and I don't think her not, um, has as much to do with her feelings for you, as it has to do with her feelings about oral.
I agree with the other posters, that it is a performance anxiety problem.
I have also found myself in the same situation before. I haven't had a tremendous amount of experience, but I've had a few partners. One of my ex-girlfriends was able to get me going at the drop of a hat, never had any issues getting things going. My next ex-girlfriend only rarely was able to get me going... even though she was more attractive than the previous. We went out for nearly a year, with no improvement over the span of the relationship. We performed oral on each other (only sometimes did it work on me), I even tried viagra... but it didn't make a difference (it only helps when it's a physical cause).
One of the things I've attributed to my issues is basically being absolutely terrified of getting someone pregnant. The ex that I never had trouble with was on the pill; the ex I had trouble with was not, already had a kid and had a firm stance on right to life. But as it turns out, my subconscious and my mini-me knew better than my heart/brain anyway. The second ex turned out to be a gold digger with no financial sense, and a lot of psychological issues. It has actually made me put serious thought into getting a vasectomy... I know I don't ever want kids, I don't really like them, nor is there any pressing reason why I should have kids. The only thing to overcome then is just the social aspect of it... parents/grandparents wanting grandchildren, dating pool being more limited since the majority of women want to have children, etc.
So perhaps you should listen to your 'small brain'... perhaps it has figured out something you haven't. It's a new relationship, and you're having trouble; call it a wash and find someone that makes you tick. Getting your goods to work when you're in the right relationship is a non-issue barring actual physical problems.
Location: Everybody is going to hurt you, you just gotta find the ones worth suffering for-B Marley
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Quote:
Originally Posted by stepka
Yeah, I think that's another topic, b/c the point here is that she's not willing to please him in the very most beginning stages of a relationship, the time when most people give their all to make it work. Assuming that they want to of course.
Your wife is sure of you now, and I don't think her not, um, has as much to do with her feelings for you, as it has to do with her feelings about oral.
Huh? Is that about my wife? I don't have one. Never have. I've been one. Glad I'm not one anymore. But never had one.
What if it's the wife and she won't do it? Used to years ago but refuses now. What would you suggest for the man? I guess this is off topic but I'm curious.
Yeah, it's off topic but not that far off - I'd say it was time for a big discussion.
Quote:
Originally Posted by Professor Griff
Thanks. Finally, another guy steps forward LOL. It happens and its not all uncommon. I wish some women would realize and understand that instead of emasculating a guy for it.
We do understand. and we're pretty forgiving about it. And most of us are willing to do EXTRA to help out. Now in the OP's case, I'd have been feeling guilty that I contributed to or caused the problem by my lack of assistance if I were the woman.
Quote:
Originally Posted by Morphous01
, I have seen 55ish old women that got me horny.
HEY! Was that you, Morph? I am over 55 but I'm not OLD!
Quote:
Originally Posted by stepka
the point here is that she's not willing to please him in the very most beginning stages of a relationship, the time when most people give their all to make it work. Assuming that they want to of course.
That's just a total "do-me-girl". Why do you guys put up with it?
Back when I was single, I dated this really nice young man. We were getting along great, I thought. Until he said to me, "I don't do that."
My clothes were on faster than they came off and I walked right on out. Door couldn't even hit me in the rear. He kept calling and e-mailing and I just kept ignoring him. Finally, after about 6 months of him pestering me, he sent an e-mail that said, "I tried it and like it. So can we go out again now?"
OP, she owes you -- either her jaw's been wired shut - so you can wait it out -- or she doesn't "do that" so you can walk away - bye bye, adios, sayonara, hasta la vista. And I bet your problem goes away with her.
Yeah, I think that's another topic, b/c the point here is that she's not willing to please him in the very most beginning stages of a relationship, the time when most people give their all to make it work. Assuming that they want to of course.
But she did answer the door naked, so it's pretty obvious that she wanted to please him at least some. His lack of arousal probably felt like a rejection and shut her down for the evening.
But she did answer the door naked, so it's pretty obvious that she wanted to please him at least some. His lack of arousal probably felt like a rejection and shut her down for the evening.
I interpreted that as her wanting to be pleased, not that she wanted to please him. A booty call kind of thing. But it's hard to say, and you're right, she could be feeling very rejected after she made herself so vulnerable.
HEY! Was that you, Morph? I am over 55 but I'm not OLD!
Older women are so sexy. I'm really not interested in younger women anymore (20-33).
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Is that about my wife? 
I don't have one. Never have. I've been one. Glad I'm not one anymore. But never had one. 
