Please register to participate in our discussions with 2 million other members - it's free and quick! Some forums can only be seen by registered members. After you create your account, you'll be able to customize options and access all our 15,000 new posts/day with fewer ads.
She’s currently in ICU, and she’s recovering. Her prognosis is good and she might fully recover. Thank God. Her recovery will probably take weeks, maybe even months. But she is ALIVE.
This all started two weeks ago, and when I say she died 3x it’s because her heart stopped 3x. We were already in the ER when it all happened. Fortunately!
I also say she died 3x because during my own CPR trainings the instructor would tell us that there’s nothing that we could do that was wrong, because technically the person was already dead.
The first time her heart stopped, I was beside her when her breathing became labored. I went and got the nurse, and when we both came in (and I was only gone for maybe 30 seconds), her heart soon stopped. One interesting thing, now that I think about it later, is that no alarm or alert went off.
Things got busy FAST. Fortunately they let me stay in the room, and I did my best to stay out of their way in the small room. I even assisted a little bit and the response team expressed their thanks when I did, so I know I wasn’t being a bother for the job they had to do.
They were doing CPR. I wanted to be there for her. I wanted her to know I was there. I was talking to her, letting her know I was there, telling her to fight, and also squeezing her hand or shoulder or leg or foot 3x, depending on where I was as I moved out of their way, in our own way how we silently tell each other I Love You: 3 squeezes.
On some level I have to know that I was getting through to her.
I half expected the response team and/or the doctor to ask me to leave. One time, I wasn’t really sure I was supposed to be there so I stepped back, not wanting to be in the way, and the doc told me to step back in and be there, and continue doing what I was doing. Some of the times all I could do was reach into the gap between two responders to squeeze her shoulder. Or I would just touch her, and communicate through that touching.
Those guys were great. They did a great job but also they wanted me to be there, for which I’m so grateful. Frankly if they told me to leave the room I was prepared to tell them there’s no effing way I’m leaving her side. Fortunately it never got to that point. I’m grateful they were cool with me being there.
She needed chest compressions for three minutes, and then her heart started beating on its own. She was back.
After her vitals became stable enough, only then did I call family, because until that time things had been very minor. I hadn’t mentioned to family that we were there because it was a nothing visit, really. We had gone to the ER because she had nonstop nausea for a long time, after being excessively fatigued for 3 days. Nothing, in the grand scheme of things.
Fast forward four hours, and after some tests they knew she needed emergency surgery. They were prepping her for that while my family and I were outside the room and discussing the procedure with the surgeon.
And then her heart stopped again. I immediately took my position and did like before. After some time her heart restarted, but then it stopped again. All told she needed CPR for about 15-20 minutes during those two stoppages. The surgeon was telling the response team that all he needed was a pulse from her, and if they could get that then he would take her into the OR for the needed procedure.
It was a loooong time, those 15-20 minutes. But those guys did it, and my wife did too, and her heart started up again.
She immediately went in for that surgery and thank God she made it through. It was late at night when they were done, 1am, and also thank God she made it through that night. I thought there was a not-small chance she might not make it through.
Fast forward two weeks and she’s been transferred to another hospital and gotten another critical surgery. That one took six hours. Another time I thought there was a not-small chance she might not make it through.
She is tough, my wife. She’s a fighter.
Throughout these events I’ve been clinging to Romans 8:28 and Romans 8:38-39.
Romans 8:28 — And we know that in all things God works for the good of those who love him, who have been called according to his purpose.
Romans 8:38-39 — For I am convinced that neither death nor life, neither angels nor demons, neither the present nor the future, nor any powers, neither height nor depth, nor anything else in all creation, will be able to separate us from the love of God that is in Christ Jesus our Lord.
Even if she had died, I’d still be clinging to those verses. We all have to die one day, right? I trust in God. We both do. Even when things don’t work out the way we want, we do.
(For any Formula 1 fans, if you know who Ayrton Senna is (my favorite), on his gravestone he has Romans 8:38-39 written: nothing can separate me from the love of God.)
Sorry for the long post. Thanks for letting me share this.
After she is conscious (I try to be an optimist in these situations) after you tell her you love her maybe ask her if at any point she was aware of her surroundings while her heart was stopped. There are so many anecdotal NDE stories it'd be interesting to get a first-hand account of what she might or might not have been aware of while she was "dead". My money is on her not remembering anything, but you never know. So glad she is still with you.
You win the bet. She doesn’t remember a thing about it. She doesn’t even remember being nauseous before we went to the ER. But on some subconscious level I feel like she knows.
She’s currently in ICU, and she’s recovering. Her prognosis is good and she might fully recover. Thank God. Her recovery will probably take weeks, maybe even months. But she is ALIVE.
This all started two weeks ago, and when I say she died 3x it’s because her heart stopped 3x. We were already in the ER when it all happened. Fortunately!
I also say she died 3x because during my own CPR trainings the instructor would tell us that there’s nothing that we could do that was wrong, because technically the person was already dead.
The first time her heart stopped, I was beside her when her breathing became labored. I went and got the nurse, and when we both came in (and I was only gone for maybe 30 seconds), her heart soon stopped. One interesting thing, now that I think about it later, is that no alarm or alert went off.
Things got busy FAST. Fortunately they let me stay in the room, and I did my best to stay out of their way in the small room. I even assisted a little bit and the response team expressed their thanks when I did, so I know I wasn’t being a bother for the job they had to do.
They were doing CPR. I wanted to be there for her. I wanted her to know I was there. I was talking to her, letting her know I was there, telling her to fight, and also squeezing her hand or shoulder or leg or foot 3x, depending on where I was as I moved out of their way, in our own way how we silently tell each other I Love You: 3 squeezes.
On some level I have to know that I was getting through to her.
I half expected the response team and/or the doctor to ask me to leave. One time, I wasn’t really sure I was supposed to be there so I stepped back, not wanting to be in the way, and the doc told me to step back in and be there, and continue doing what I was doing. Some of the times all I could do was reach into the gap between two responders to squeeze her shoulder. Or I would just touch her, and communicate through that touching.
Those guys were great. They did a great job but also they wanted me to be there, for which I’m so grateful. Frankly if they told me to leave the room I was prepared to tell them there’s no effing way I’m leaving her side. Fortunately it never got to that point. I’m grateful they were cool with me being there.
She needed chest compressions for three minutes, and then her heart started beating on its own. She was back.
After her vitals became stable enough, only then did I call family, because until that time things had been very minor. I hadn’t mentioned to family that we were there because it was a nothing visit, really. We had gone to the ER because she had nonstop nausea for a long time, after being excessively fatigued for 3 days. Nothing, in the grand scheme of things.
Fast forward four hours, and after some tests they knew she needed emergency surgery. They were prepping her for that while my family and I were outside the room and discussing the procedure with the surgeon.
And then her heart stopped again. I immediately took my position and did like before. After some time her heart restarted, but then it stopped again. All told she needed CPR for about 15-20 minutes during those two stoppages. The surgeon was telling the response team that all he needed was a pulse from her, and if they could get that then he would take her into the OR for the needed procedure.
It was a loooong time, those 15-20 minutes. But those guys did it, and my wife did too, and her heart started up again.
She immediately went in for that surgery and thank God she made it through. It was late at night when they were done, 1am, and also thank God she made it through that night. I thought there was a not-small chance she might not make it through.
Fast forward two weeks and she’s been transferred to another hospital and gotten another critical surgery. That one took six hours. Another time I thought there was a not-small chance she might not make it through.
She is tough, my wife. She’s a fighter.
Throughout these events I’ve been clinging to Romans 8:28 and Romans 8:38-39.
Romans 8:28 — And we know that in all things God works for the good of those who love him, who have been called according to his purpose.
Romans 8:38-39 — For I am convinced that neither death nor life, neither angels nor demons, neither the present nor the future, nor any powers, neither height nor depth, nor anything else in all creation, will be able to separate us from the love of God that is in Christ Jesus our Lord.
Even if she had died, I’d still be clinging to those verses. We all have to die one day, right? I trust in God. We both do. Even when things don’t work out the way we want, we do.
(For any Formula 1 fans, if you know who Ayrton Senna is (my favorite), on his gravestone he has Romans 8:38-39 written: nothing can separate me from the love of God.)
Sorry for the long post. Thanks for letting me share this.
Sincere congratulations on your wife's survival!
I would say though that your wife, like you and everyone else, will only die once, and it hasn't happened yet. "It is appointed unto man to die once", and all that jazz.
My wife was moved to a lower intensity ICU room (if I can call it that). And they are planning to move her to a regular room — maybe later today, or tomorrow. Progress!
Please register to post and access all features of our very popular forum. It is free and quick. Over $68,000 in prizes has already been given out to active posters on our forum. Additional giveaways are planned.
Detailed information about all U.S. cities, counties, and zip codes on our site: City-data.com.
Please register to participate in our discussions with 2 million other members - it's free and quick! Some forums can only be seen by registered members. After you create your account, you'll be able to customize options and access all our 15,000 new posts/day with fewer ads.
