Opinions on downsizing (apartments, lease, square footage, house)

[jlillywh]

I'm moving out of a large home in a suburb with my family (wife and 4 kids) to a more expensive area that requires we downsize. Currently, we are in a 3,000 sq ft home on 1/3 acre. My wife and I both grew up in spacious suburbia with big yards and drove everywhere.

We are realizing that we simply can't afford to buy anything nearly as spacious as that which we are used to. I look at these town homes and apartments and just can't imagine at all how my 4 kids will be happy in such a place. I don't know what my problem is... my pride? The worry that we share a wall with someone and bug them with the noise? Feeling cramped?

Can anyone share some insight?

Thank you!

PS - we are moving from a suburb in Utah to Issaquah, WA. Yes, Issaquah is a suburb as well but much more expensive and I want to live close to work.

[chet everett]

Nothing terribly unique about this situation -- if you have grown accustomed to a large home in an area where such properties are affordable and relocate to an area that results in a shorter commute but homes are more costly you gotta compromise.

Given that you have four kids I would probably focus on homes that will allow at least one pair of same sex kids to "bunk up" and go for a floor plan that still gives you both one big "family room" and some space for other family members to engage in quieter activities. Even older homes might have a "study" that works well for when part of the family is reading / doing homework. Some "bonus rooms" or lofts that are sometimes marketed for the "home office" buyer will also prove to be excellent for sibling (or spouse...) to curl up with a book away from the hub bub...

I have a whole host of reasons to avoid town homes , which include your legitimate fears of shared walls, but also revolve around the relative level of restrictions that such HOA might impose on a family that probably have more than a few bicycles , roller blades, baseball bats, etc. Further the history of relative price stability of most townhomes is not as good as that of detatched single family homes -- you just cannot control as many of the factors that lead to price movement when the HOA sets assessments/ decideds on maintainenance as when you decide to fix up an older single family home...

I would encourage you to seek out a distressed home owner that is willing to rent you a single family home before you sign a lease on an apartment or buy a townhouse. It really can be a much better option.

[CarlitosBala]

People with 4 kids should never live in apartment. Unless its one of those truly giant ones with concrete floors/ceiling and walls. Not only for your sanity, but the sanity of the people above and below you.

I'd go with a large town-home in your case, or even a smaller home (2-3 bedroom) so long as it has a finished basement.

[bouncethelight]

Originally Posted by CarlitosBala

I'd go with a large town-home in your case, or even a smaller home (2-3 bedroom) so long as it has a finished basement.

He has a 3000 square foot home now, so even going to 2000 square foot house would be downsizing - significantly! I grew up in a four bedroom 2000 square foot house - and all our bedrooms were huge. We had a normal-sized living room and dining room and kitchen - and used one of those bedrooms as a den/family room. No basements - finished or otherwise - in California! It was great! And we were in the most expensive neighborhood in the area - my parents always prioritized a more modest house in a great neighborhood, over a mansion in a lessor neighborhood.

I wouldn't want to have less than four bedrooms, with four kids - and even then two of the kids will have to share. But if the layout of the house is right, it's entirely possible to get four bedrooms in a smaller house. You'll be using the living room a lot more, since there's no media room or great room - but that's okay. It's an adjustment, but it won't be all that difficult! And believe me, if you live in a nice, well-kept neighborhood you love, and you love your home, no one else will be counting the square footage and finding you wanting! It's actually considered chic now to live more simply, so you're part of that new trend!

[KonaKat]

I also vote for a single family home if at all possible. I would rather have a modest home with a yard than the nicest penthouse in town with kids (or without kids, personally!)

Along with "downsizing" your home, downsize your furniture. You probably have furniture that fits a 3000 sf home with large rooms. Scaled down versions of various pieces of furniture to fit, and work well, in a house that has overall smaller rooms will help. Look for versatile, multiuse items, things that have storage like ottoman that has a lid that opens up & storage inside, bunkbeds, etc. I hate to see people try to get that gargantuan sectional sofa into a living room half the size it needs to be attractive and practical. A Cal-King bed might leave you with only a foot or two of space between bed and wall, and unless you're 6 foot tall, a Queen will probably work. If not, look at eliminating the large dresser and customize your closet for optimal storage.

If your rooms are jammed with furniture you're going to feel even more crowded and claustrophobic.

[chicagojlo]

I grew up in a 4 bed house with 4 siblings and it was nowhere near 2,000 sq ft, never mind 3,000 sq ft.

Look on it as an opportunity for your kids to learn a few life lessons for when they're out in the real world and it's not all 3,000 sq ft mansions.

Personally I wonder why you made this decision to relocate without considering whether you could live in the way you want to. If you're not going to be happy living in a smaller home perhaps it's not so wise to uproot all your kids only to end up moving them back.

And KonaKat's suggestions on furniture are great. You're also going to have to lose a lot of 'stuff', but most people would actually benefit from that.