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We're moving to MDI, in ME. But while we have a house there, one of the first things we plan to do is visit each of the three communities on-island, so that in 20 years if we become too feeble to survive on our own, we have our names in the list for a placement there. Always palnning ahead.
That's a good idea. We visited one CCR that had a ten year waiting list. However, I do believe that with so many being built, that situation is bound to change.
That's a good idea. We visited one CCR that had a ten year waiting list. However, I do believe that with so many being built, that situation is bound to change.
You can always get on the waiting list and if you are not ready, then kick yourself down the list for another 5 or 8 years. Our expectation is to put ourselves on the list, but only if we have to. If we can stay hardy and vital, then fine we'll live on our own until it simply becomes impossible.
My in-laws are a perfect example of not planning ahead. My MiL is 82 and my FiL is 90. When the FiL was 70 he wanted to move to a facility where he would have a house and could travel and do things, but MiL refused to move since she was only 62. Now he has dementia and she is morbidly obese with CFL and diabetes. The should be in some kind of care but she refuses to cooperate, and he has dementia and doesn't know where he is most of the time. My wife and her sisters are simply unable to do anything about the situation.
If they'd planned ahead, then they could have moved. She could still be doing things, and he would be in on-going care and getting enough food. Finding a place for them now is a nightmare, and if it does happen, will use up 100% of the inheritance.
Another problem resulting from waiting too long: when you do move in you no longer are able to socialize effectively thus are not able to make friends with people who will be supportive when you have problems in the future. This happened to some folks that I know - they felt very isolated. In the same vein, these facilities are frequently very clickish and some effort is needed to join a group. If one is not well, this can be difficult.
My 80-something uncle was widowed 30 years ago. His kids take care of him - but he needed much more assistance than they could provide.
He spent some time in an assisted living retirement center - but returned home shortly thereafter. He was the only man amongst many women. He was extremely lonely. Not another guy (who was anywhere near cognizant) to carry on a conversation. It was disconcerting for him.
Women outnumber men in nursing homes. I don't know what the numbers are - but they are significant.
Yeah, all the brochures like to show silver-haired foxes in male-female couples. Heh.
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