Does anyone get along worse with their spouse after they retired? (conversation, marriage)
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by far my best relationships (not married) have been after retirement. but i hear you. lots of old guy divorce can be traced to retirement. however, for older singles, older gals are a joy.
they are no longer holding out for george clooney-- they are willing to settle at last.
What a fun thread! I retired 6 month ago and a big, big part of that decision was that I wanted some time on my own before BiscuitPop retires. Best guess is he'll join me 10 months from now. That left/ leaves 16 months on my own, and I'm making the best of it.
I love my guy to death but I'm happy to know that I'm not alone in needing some time with myself.
DH retires next year and it scares the crap out of me. I only see him 8 days a month as we work different shifts. He tries to tell me what to do about everything, even which way to turn when I'm driving. I love him with every fiber of my being but I don't know if I can live with him under foot 24/7. This may make me an even bigger workaholic or put me on the evening news.
Does anyone get along worse with their spouse after they retired?
Yeah. Like every retired couple I know. Of course, most of these people are from a previous generation - the wives are irritated by their husbands being 'underfoot.'
Does anyone get along worse with their spouse after they retired?
Yeah. Like every retired couple I know. Of course, most of these people are from a previous generation - the wives are irritated by their husbands being 'underfoot.'
I think it's more that it is a drastic change in lifestyle. How do you live with someone 24/7 when you really haven't done that in over 20 years?
My situation evolved over time and is not necessarily unique.
My wife and I retired early at 50. She felt she had to find a new life and divorced me about 7 years ago when we were 53, after my son left for college. I think she began regretting it shortly thereafter. After lots of twists and turns, we are now back together again at 60. Not married, but living together as partners and we are both looking to move away from Chicago and back to the East Coast. Hopefully to a place where we can quietly spend retirement.
I have heard of other couples also getting together after splitting up. My brother separated from his wife but they are still seeing each other almost every day. Just sharing different living quarters. A friend of mine and her husband are basically doing the same thing.
I live in an area with many retirees, and I have been surprised at the number whose marriages went pear-shaped upon retirement. A number of them still live in the same town and see each other socially, and a couple now live together again, but have not remarried.
It looks to me that some of these people are trying to "catch up," looking for a sense of personal fulfillment that was denied while raising a family, and which now may have a chance of being explored.
That makes perfect sense.
But what I don't get is why it has to be that way.
I mean, do people live in just one room?
LOL No. DH has his man cave and computer room but the fact that he will be with me all the time is hard for me as my privacy totally disappears when he is around. As does total control of the remote!!!. He goes to Osh Kosh for a couple of days for the air show every year and calls me when he arrives safely. I told him that I never felt so free, which made him laugh, but I really enjoy my time alone and I'm afraid that won't exist anymore.
LOL No. DH has his man cave and computer room but the fact that he will be with me all the time is hard for me as my privacy totally disappears when he is around. As does total control of the remote!!!. He goes to Osh Kosh for a couple of days for the air show every year and calls me when he arrives safely. I told him that I never felt so free, which made him laugh, but I really enjoy my time alone and I'm afraid that won't exist anymore.
It's interesting, isn't it?
One of my criteria for marrying someone (and actually for even a serious relationship) was always "I have to be able to stand to be around you all the time." This limited my relationships, but my last 2 were very much like that (including my current marriage).
There are couples (like my dentist and his wife) who work together AND (obviously) live together. I guess they don't get sick of each other.
Every couple is different.
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