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I love the game of chess and spend time as a coach. I always tell players to not run from the opposing team but to stay close. I decided to take that approach to life a long time ago. I don't run from fear. I face it. I don't run from the unknown, I face it. In doing so, I found out that life is actually a bit better than I originally thought and there really isn't to much to fear.
A real life change for me was the night I accompanied my neighbors to the Board of Selectmen, an elected governing body, and were told that if we "didn't like the way the town was being managed, run for office." We lingered outside the town hall and thought, well, why not? Three of us decided to run for the top three posts in town. The entrenched gang looked askance at our campaign. We wrote friendly notes to the taxpayers, they liked what we had to say and all three of us defeated the incumbents. The rest became history. I ended up in higher office. Sometimes, I wonder whether serving others for as long as I did was worth it, to me, that is. I see my friends a lot richer, world traveled et cetera. I never thought accumulating money was important. Sometimes, I wonder what life would be like if I had put "wealth" first. But you know something? Here I am at the end of my career, retired now, and I think. If this is what the end of life is like, I am glad that my bags are packed with the good things I was able to accomplish, the memories of the people I helped along the way, there is a story told that "God won't ask us what kind of house we built, car we drove, how much money we accumulated, but he will ask us how many poor, old, helpless, etc. people we helped along the way. It doesn't mean you have to give up your house and wealth, it just means don't miss those opportunities when even a kind word will make some one's day. You won't be sorry.l...upon reflection. I thought retirement would be boring, but you guys make it interesting, and I do spend more time reading, visiting, advising young would be candidates, playing with my great grandchildren. Just the other day, I told a niece that "my bags are packed with the things that I did and I hope God is pleased with them." Let me end with this.(I am usually a lot tougher than this stuff, but you awakened thoughts that were buried somewhere." For those who laugh at us, " Whenever anyone tears at the fabric, that a man has woven for himself and his family, no matter how clumsily, the whole world suffers." (Robert Kennedy). Sure, I wonder, what life would have been like, had I chosen a different path, but I honestly believe, we get dragged to the point in life at which we should be. P.S. Along the way, after my kids graduated, married et cetera, I went back to college, nights, days, week ends and earned a B.S. and an M.S. I earned my Master's at 64 years. So do what your heart tells you and believe there is a force that propels you to the right place.
Last edited by Friendly blogger; 02-29-2008 at 03:46 PM..
Reason: the usual speed typing and resulting mispelling.
What one thing or things changed your life? (for the better) - A job decision, a move, meeting the right person at the wrong time or the right time, having children, etc?
Location: We_tside PNW (Columbia Gorge) / CO / SA TX / Thailand
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lived and worked a lot with grandparents as a youth
then,
grew up on a dairy farm... 24/7
then,
at age 18 became the primary caregiver for a disabled parent as the other one 'split' for freedom.
You tend to take a different perspective when your life has not been of your own choosing. But then who is to say I would have made the right choices, or that they would have been better ? I am grateful to be healthy and retired pre-50, and very lucky to have good spouse and kids. Being a parent is probably the most influential event, tho not for all.
A real life change for me was the night I accompanied my neighbors to the Board of Selectmen, an elected governing body, and were told that if we "didn't like the way the town was being managed, run for office." We lingered outside the town hall and thought, well, why not? Three of us decided to run for the top three posts in town. The entrenched gang looked askance at our campaign. We wrote friendly notes to the taxpayers, they liked what we had to say and all three of us defeated the incumbents. The rest became history. I ended up in higher office. Sometimes, I wonder whether serving others for as long as I did was worth it, to me, that is. I see my friends a lot richer, world traveled et cetera. I never thought accumulating money was important. Sometimes, I wonder what life would be like if I had put "wealth" first. But you know something? Here I am at the end of my career, retired now, and I think. If this is what the end of life is like, I am glad that my bags are packed with the good things I was able to accomplish, the memories of the people I helped along the way, there is a story told that "God won't ask us what kind of house we built, car we drove, how much money we accumulated, but he will ask us how many poor, old, helpless, etc. people we helped along the way. It doesn't mean you have to give up your house and wealth, it just means don't miss those opportunities when even a kind word will make some one's day. You won't be sorry.l...upon reflection. I thought retirement would be boring, but you guys make it interesting, and I do spend more time reading, visiting, advising young would be candidates, playing with my great grandchildren. Just the other day, I told a niece that "my bags are packed with the things that I did and I hope God is pleased with them." Let me end with this.(I am usually a lot tougher than this stuff, but you awakened thoughts that were buried somewhere." For those who laugh at us, " Whenever anyone tears at the fabric, that a man has woven for himself and his family, no matter how clumsily, the whole world suffers." (Robert Kennedy). Sure, I wonder, what life would have been like, had I chosen a different path, but I honestly believe, we get dragged to the point in life at which we should be. P.S. Along the way, after my kids graduated, married et cetera, I went back to college, nights, days, week ends and earned a B.S. and an M.S. I earned my Master's at 64 years. So do what your heart tells you and believe there is a force that propels you to the right place.
So good to hear from someone who tried to make a difference. So many of us never seem to make the connection between doing something to change things and just joining in with the status quo and bemoaning any and everything. You chose public service and put people of need ahead of personal gain. Your satisfaction with your life speaks volumes. Thanks for all you did for so many and the great post.
Thanks Gregory: One of the projects I worked on was to establish what I believe, may be the first Special Legislative Committee on Foster Care. Several of my colleagues were foster kids, like myself. We wanted foster kids everywhere to know they are not "junk" and that we were there to help make changes. We did make overa dozen changes in the system and to implement an education tuition benefit to be used in public colleges, if they maintained good grades in high school. My kitchen door is covered with the pictures of the kids I helped place in good homes or to keep them in the good homes they had. Whever I feel that I have not accomplished much, I look at the door and the smiling faces. Some of them have gone on to the service, college, and one actually works as a social worker in the same department that had power over her future. Today, I have three grandchildren, graduates of Princeton University, University of Vermont and a senior at Holy Cross, Worcester, Ma. three great grandchildren. So to those of you who wonder about your future and what it holds for you, follow your heart, make a difference, even a small difference in your social circle. Later on, after you weigh all that happened over the years, the good things will surface again and you will realize that was exactly what you were supposed to do. Again, thanks, Gregory. Hope we chat again.
1. Leaving home at 17 (i.e. being brave and strong enough to leave a bad situation).
2. Getting a "corporate" job even though my cool hippy roommates mocked me. (i.e. being brave and strong enough to be different).
3. Putting my first husband through school. Even though he didn't appreciate it and dropped out after a year, I learned that I could achieve things that many people "knew" were beyond my grasp.
4. Divorcing that jerk, and leaving the hippy lifestyle.
5. Putting myself through college. Impossible, of course, because I needed scholarships and I had to take high school math classes that I skipped the first time around. Impossible, of course, because everyone knew the black kids didn't go to college and I hadn't taken the right math classes in high school. Impossible, of course because I wasn't a kid anymore... I was a divorced, older female who had spent years living like a hippy and I was broke and I didn't have a family to help me out. Good thing I didn't listen to all the people who said it was impossible!
6. Moving to the suburbs. I was too cool for the suburbs, always lived in the heart of a city. Got assaulted one night when I was walking home in DC. Had to stay with my relatives who lived in a suburb (oh the horror! ) Grew to love it. Have lived in suburbs ever since, and to my amazement positive things started happening for me as a result.
7. Starting a business. I could write a book about the growth that happened as a result of this. It brought my family together, too, since it is a family business. It hasn't always been rosey, but in general I think owning your own business is the way to go in life.
8. Retiring. I can already see my life starting to sprout in new directions, and my retirement just began.
The recurring, life-changing pattern? Not listening to people who put me down or who "knew" I would fail. Not following the common path. Leaving unhealthy situations.
What one thing or things changed your life? (for the better) - A job decision, a move, meeting the right person at the wrong time or the right time, having children, etc?
I moved to the south when my son was eight so that I wouldn't have to work as much just to keep a roof over our heads. I hardly had time to spend with him in NY because of the high cost of living.
It gave me the opportunity to spend a lot more time with him, which was the primary reason for doing it, but it also presentd other opportunities for me. I was able to start a business and gain some financial security, meet a man worth marrying, and live a pretty good life.
just happened to see your message from 2007. unfortunately did not get across it before as it seemed such an interesting and honest moment of your life. what happened to you afterwards? are you a parent of two children , a boy and a girl since then? or did you travel to India? would love to know more about your desitions and how have you made your life devope since then.
regards,
anneli
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) Grew to love it. Have lived in suburbs ever since, and to my amazement positive things started happening for me as a result. 
