Quote:
Originally Posted by Bette
Our son suggested just us going to a restaurant. ...had so many leftovers and had bought something for my FIL anyway.
After eating, we went to visit with him and gave him the goodies. It was not a long visit as he had been somewhere with one of the caregivers so he was practically falling asleep when we were there; but we saw him and he knew we were there.
We felt it was such a quiet Thanksgiving for us; other family members spread out this year.
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Great choice.
Probably his last Thanksgiving. but...
what we have done (Caregiver for 32 yrs + volunteer with LOTS of local seniors / shut-ins.)
If they are able to get out,
they usually really enjoy a short drive to their favorite spots. (be sure to check those spots out FIRST, one farmer / pioneer couple had a way of getting us WAY off the main road. We had hairy adventures with them, but they loved it! They knew so much HISTORY of the local backwoods, it was a joy, but often risk and scary (one lane snow / mud jeep trails, no cell coverage)
Restaurants are OUT on holidays (in my book)
We invite them to our 'ADA home' for 'tea / snacks' (sometimes dinner if they like)...and bring out instruments for them to play (If they desire) then we sing whatever they want! Give them lots of time to share stories. (record them if possible). Bring out old pictures / 8mm home movies.
Do some drama / skits if you have multi generations (the kids usually are quite happy to do this)
Take a group to a community center (if you have several people to handle)
Board games can be fun for them (I hate board games, but will do it for them ONLY)
Find out what time of day is most alert / happy for them, and get MEDS to-go!
Make it ALL about them (it must be very lonely in a SNF as a 'number' / care room recluse.)
Diet: We often 'cheat' and get them their favorite food (as appropriate to restrictions... a friend LOVED cheesecake, but was not supposed to have it (since age 68), he got plenty from me, and lived to 96 (independently in his home and DRIVING his Mustang Cobra!).
On the more extreme end... an elderly friend was 3 hrs away and ALWAYS wanted to come for the 'day', but be home by midnight! so... for over 10 yrs, I drove 12 hrs each holiday to grant them their wish. It was a privilege (but very dangerous in winter / ice / snow / holiday traffic and being tired). I was insured at the time, so the risk would have been mitigated for my surviving family.
Enjoy these 'challenges', and be glad you are not cooped up in a bed!
What goes around, comes around. (often) AT least be a good example to your kids (especially your ADULT kids)
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What we did....
