Is it better for older people to get married or live together? (gay, moving)
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Marriage is the path that a man and woman take to show their commitment to each other. Living together without marriage effectively states that they are not committed to each other. This is true of every culture and society in the world.
I knew there were a lot of dinosaurs in Wyoming, but I thought they were all dead long ago.
Stealth, 96 and still kickin...my kind of man to look up to. Tis a shame reading your post on the poor situations in the family doings. Wish you and yours the best ahead. I have my problems to deal with on my own. Veterans day, several Military vet suicides in the news. They had issues that needed fixing but no help. I have been widowed 48 yrs and will stay single on my own till the last day comes around.....no nagging for me. As for my estate.....up in the air for now.
I have out lived 2 good wives, and my SO has been divorced twice, and neither one of us wants to be a "three time loser", so for now, we are happy with our unmarried status.
One can have a will, a living will/health care directive, and named beneficiaries on bank and investment accounts. One can name whomever they want to make end of life decisions and to inherit. Most/all states have their healthcare directives online. No lawyer needed so there is no excuse.
It is sad that many people do not get this paperwork in order (as your pathologist child has witnessed. )
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Thanks for adding this!
I attempted to state this in an edit but my phone kept crashing. Grrrrr.
Is it better for older people to get married or live together? Speaking financially, family issues, emotionally, and otherwise?
I prefer neither of those options. Living apart is what keeps our relationship going. If I had to share a home with anyone again, I would have to move out.
Last edited by ChessieMom; 11-12-2021 at 07:03 AM..
Interesting thread. As one gets older the share living can be a problem. Companionship might be the case or old age needing a helping hand. I find myself in the latter. Family help...nawww since they have their own problems or issues. What to do now. Friends, neighbors have either moved away or passed on even tho they were younger then myself. I am up against the wall just finding out that my driver for a upcoming surgery is now having a surgery herself. Not sure of her recovery time as I was/am scheduled for Dec 2nd and wou;ld need a Adult to sign me out and drive me home. Next tues hospital/Dr visit will determine a go ahead or cancel to another day. I am not about to hassle my two adult sons who are a few hundred miles from me. I was ignored for too many past yrs as they never contacted me. This similarity covers the live/stay together for some on this thread.
There are medical transport vans that you can schedule. There are a lot of caregiver agencies out there. You could hire a caregiver for a shift to drive you home, and get you settled. You could stay in a hotel in San Diego for a night and take a taxi, or Uber to and from the appointment, or schedule a medical transport van to the hotel from the hospital. Then in a day or two your other ride could come get you from the hotel.
After 31 years of marriage, I can’t imagine trying again. I don’t think I’d even want a live in. I love and am in love with my husband but don’t feel I’d want to put the time and effort into another marriage.
And I disagree with the poster who wrote lack of marriage = lack of commitment. There are many practical reasons not to marry later in life including losing survivor benefits.
How old is "older" though. The reason I ask is because survivor benefits aren't changed by remarriage after age 60.
Location: We_tside PNW (Columbia Gorge) / CO / SA TX / Thailand
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Quote:
Originally Posted by TheShadow
There are medical transport vans that you can schedule. There are a lot of caregiver agencies out there. ....
SD likely has a senior services solution, especially for veterans. (many communites have a very strong "Catholic Community Services", there are probably many more in SD) http://ccdsd.org/
There should be a respite home / care center that offers rides and temporary housing. (Free to nominal fee)
With the pension system that I am under, unless we were married prior to my retirement, everything (pension and healthcare) dies with me, even if she is/was under my healthcare. Since I am single, there is no real compelling reason to be married, we can be just as committed without the paper, and I expect her, like me, to have set up her kids as the benefit of her estate.
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