best place to move? (san diego, irvine, los angeles, long beach) (Oceanside: rental, school)

[lo2162]

I'm starting a joint Ph.D. program at UC San Diego and UC Irvine. I am a nervous driver. What would be the best place to move in light of safety, culture, ease of commute, etc.? Should I live closer to LA and commute to SD, or live in SD and commute to Irvine, or live somewhere in between? What are some of the nearby towns? For reference, I'm 23 and a married lesbian, so it would need to be gay friendly.

[oddstray]

Considering only the commute: Irvine is south of LA, so I would delete LA and Long Beach from your list of places to live since that would require extra driving. Your choice of where to live between Irvine and SD might depend on your exact schedule. Will you be primarily at one location? Will you be traveling between them during rush hour, or off rush hour?

For gay friendly, I have no idea what it's like around Irvine. Most of San Diego is laid-back enough that it'd be a non-issue here.

[sschibuola]

basically you are looking at pretty affluent coastal communities between Irvine and UCSD with only a few "rough" spots e.g Oceanside and south San Clemente (rough being a very relative term). irvine, Laguna Beach, Laguna Niguel, Dana Point, most of San Clemente, Carlsbad, Encinitas, Solana Beach, Del Mar and La Jolla are all slightly different shades of upscale suburban with vestigial bits of classic California surf town thrown in. overall a pretty conservative place but also pretty tolerant (it's a California thing).

I believe Laguna Beach is the most gay-friendly of the bunch (has a gay culture stretching back to the forties I believe) but its also one of the priciest and probably out of reach of a grad student (it would have been for me!). if you will be spending most of your time at the Irvine end, maybe look at the cities just inland of Laguna Beach eg Mission Viejo and Aliso Viejo.

the toll road between Irvine (practically starts at the front door of UCI) and Dana Point is worth the 5 bucks to avoid the worst part of I-405.

it's not particularly convenient to either school, but there is Amtrak train service between Irvine and Solana Beach (though a trek from SB to UCSD)

[Fran66]

This is a joint Ph.D. program -- is there one school you're going to spend a lot more time at -- or even just more time at one school than the other? That might make a difference in the answers. I think if you are going to be spending approx. equal time at both, you might look at Oceanside, which is pretty much equal distance between both. Oceanside has Amtrak, going north and south. However, Oceanside can be a pretty dead place to live when you're young. :-)

Laguna Beach is the most gay-friendly place south of Long Beach (which also has a very strong gay community and presence). But (I think) it's hard to get in and out of. Do know that you and your partner are not going to have any problems any place. In the past 30-40 things have changed, even in conservative Orange County. 30-40 years ago we (in OC) could always tell the gay and lesbian couples -- at the malls particularly -- they were the ones who were trying so hard to pretend they weren't together. Now no one really cares about sexual orientation (and if they do, they're usually too nice to show how they think/feel). Where I worked -- Superior Court for the State of CA -- everyone was 'out' and socialized with everyone else and there were absolutely no problems. When my supervisor's partner died, not only was there a big memorial at work, but the church was so packed that people were overflowing to the outside. You're not going to have any big problems in SD or OC -- or a lot of small ones either.

[sschibuola]

I lived in Laguna Beach for a while. There are only two roads in and out so it CAN be difficult to get in and out of - particularly in the summer with all the beach and Sawdust Festival traffic (%*^&$ tourists!!). But since they opened the Toll Road it's a little better and provides a little "wormhole" route straight to UCI.

Still, the big issue will be affordability. Even in this downturn it's still expensive and there isn't a huge amount of rental stock.

[Fran66]

Originally Posted by sschibuola

I lived in Laguna Beach for a while. There are only two roads in and out so it CAN be difficult to get in and out of - particularly in the summer with all the beach and Sawdust Festival traffic (%*^&$ tourists!!). But since they opened the Toll Road it's a little better and provides a little "wormhole" route straight to UCI.

Still, the big issue will be affordability. Even in this downturn it's still expensive and there isn't a huge amount of rental stock.

Oh, I've been away the past 7 years. I didn't know about The Toll Road -- that's good to know. (I'm moving back 'home' ASAIPC.)