Sorry if this gets asked a lot...but question about social scene (San Diego: transplants, neighborhoods)

[mir86]

What is the social scene like for early 30's singles in San diego, compared to Phoenix, AZ?

I love living in AZ. there is so much to do in Phoenix and nearby areas, and cost of living is decent. My social life is meh though. the only close friendships I have here are my friends I already had from Tucson where I grew up, who moved up here also. I've made new acquaintances but no new close friendships in the 4 years I've lived here. So just curious how it stacks up with San Diego. I've lived in LA before and the natives were super friendly but the transplants weren't as nice. That was 10 years ago though. As for the dating scene here in Phoenix, it reminds me of LA. San Diego makes me think it might be more like Tucson (where I grew up), just with more options..but who knows as I've only visited, and almost moved to SD years ago.

If it helps-I'm a (soon to be) 31 single white female lol.

[CatsinSnow]

I'm a 32 year old, single white female in San Diego. I haven't made any friends out here. I joined things and while people were friendly, nope no friends. I found I was a bit older too. I'm kind of done with MeetUp. I joined Vavi which is a social sports league here. I think I was the oldest on my team. Nearly everyone was early-mid 20s.

San Diego seems to be a very social city though. Places are busy with young people a lot especially on Friday and weekends. I live in Pacific Beach (specifically in an area called Crown Point). I live in a complex with maybe 30 units. It's mainly young couples early 20s-late 20s, a few professionals around my age, and a few retired people.

I may not be the best person to get advice on though since I wouldn't say I'm super social to begin with. I'm only lonely once in awhile. I amuse myself. Just thought I would chip in since I'm in your age range.

[mir86]

Originally Posted by CatsinSnow

I'm a 32 year old, single white female in San Diego. I haven't made any friends out here. I joined things and while people were friendly, nope no friends. I found I was a bit older too. I'm kind of done with MeetUp. I joined Vavi which is a social sports league here. I think I was the oldest on my team. Nearly everyone was early-mid 20s.

San Diego seems to be a very social city though. Places are busy with young people a lot especially on Friday and weekends. I live in Pacific Beach (specifically in an area called Crown Point). I live in a complex with maybe 30 units. It's mainly young couples early 20s-late 20s, a few professionals around my age, and a few retired people.

I may not be the best person to get advice on though since I wouldn't say I'm super social to begin with. I'm only lonely once in awhile. I amuse myself. Just thought I would chip in since I'm in your age range.

Thank you for your input. Phoenix is also very social, but for some reason, I can't make strong connections. I'm a little shy too but I like going out and meeting people.

Havent tried meetup. Everyone keeps suggesting it though.

How long have you lived in SD?

[CatsinSnow]

Originally Posted by mir86

Thank you for your input. Phoenix is also very social, but for some reason, I can't make strong connections. I'm a little shy too but I like going out and meeting people.

Havent tried meetup. Everyone keeps suggesting it though.

How long have you lived in SD?

2 years.

[oddstray]

How 'social' you'll find any place is really mostly about you. It's difficult to make close friends if you're shy or introverted. That's true no matter where you are. You'll likely find more social opportunities in larger cities than in small towns. Beyond that, there's not that much difference from place to place.

[SportyandMisty]

Originally Posted by mir86

If it helps-I'm a (soon to be) 31 single white female lol.

[CatsinSnow]

[snpdragr]

Originally Posted by CatsinSnow

I'm a 32 year old, single white female in San Diego. I haven't made any friends out here. I joined things and while people were friendly, nope no friends. I found I was a bit older too. I'm kind of done with MeetUp.

My wife and I moved here a year and a half ago. In the process of moving from acquaintance to friends with people. We've had good luck with meetup and various Facebook groups. I think the trick is that it's better to go to events that are smaller (i.e. not with 50+ people signed up), have time built into the meeting to talk (i.e. not a movie watching group), and who tend have regulars that turn out.

Also try to connect with people on facebook/instagram to keep in touch. I've even met people with my same hobbies online initially but that made it easier to make connections when we meet in person.

I'm terrible meeting new people (I score high as an introvert) but this seems to be working for me.

[1AngryTaxPayer]

for the win


That will help you get friends, free beer



My advice is social events like cycling, running or even bird watching.

[Bert_from_back_East]

Let's just say that if you look like you're from the Westside of LA, South Orange County or Scottsdale, you're going not going to get very far in San Diego from a socialization standpoint.

I live in Long Beach, and every time I go down to San Diego with my friends from LA/OC, we get so many dirty looks, lots of backhanded compliments and under-breath comments, doors slammed in our faces, etc. That's in Hillcrest and adjacent neighborhoods, mind you.

In the straight neighborhoods, we just get passed over for service and, sometimes, heckled for being gay.

If I never go to San Diego again, I'll live a very happy and fruitful life.