Instructions to my son on how to buy a house in the SF Bay Area (Oakland: houses, schools)

[bodyforlife99]

He's been stalking me for quite some I figured If the moderator didn't want to do something about it, I'd just give it right back to him. He's got to be one of the most negative posters I've ever seen and all he ever does is try to start fights with me. I really get tired of these trolls.

[ambient]

Originally Posted by mysticaltyger

This is what I'm thinking. The Bay Area is just not worth the stress if you want to have kids. 2 parents working demanding full time jobs to pay the mortgage means they don't even have time to raise their own kids. Not worth it. Just move somewhere cheaper if that's what you want.

This is kinda true... I am one of those parents working a "big tech" job that earns good money; my wife is in an even better "big tech" job. Yes, we own a house - nothing special, pretty small - but in a good mid-peninsula area. I work long hours. I have two and a half year-old who I struggle to spend time with. We would have a second, but not sure when we would even conceive the kid much less raise it. We are amassing a good foundation of wealth, but we may need to leave here sometime soon.

Truth is that this is, by and large, the valley of the workaholic. There is not a big interested in the culture here in concepts like work/life balance; there is an interest in becoming rich. That is what fuels this place. Business workers tend to come here to become the next bigshot tech mogul, not to take it easy. In most cases, if you want the pay to make it here, you will accept the frantic pace of work life that comes with it.

[Ceece]

I told my son to move outside the SF Bay Area or settle for an older 1 bedroom condo. He lives with me now and we both know what's what with these inflated housing prices.

[TR95]

Originally Posted by bodyforlife99

He's been stalking me for quite some I figured If the moderator didn't want to do something about it, I'd just give it right back to him. He's got to be one of the most negative posters I've ever seen and all he ever does is try to start fights with me. I really get tired of these trolls.

You're 'real wasting your time arguing with 20 somethings that have no concept of life or reality. A little history lesson for everyone here. Something you might not have learned in your structured classroom environment nowadays that if the answer is not found electronically it must not exist.

Go back to 1989, when my class graduated college. We were at the top of a housing bubble. Homes cost $300k+, interest rates were 11-12%. Starting salaries average $24k. Ok, you follow me or have I lost everyone yet? PITI monthly payment is about $3,100/month. Comprehend? Do you get this scenario? Monthly income of $2,000 can't afford to buy a house. So what does one do? Wait until the mid to late 90s. Income has grown to $80k. Voila! Someone can afford a house. Not in the ideal area where one wants to live, but a good enough area until kids arrive.

Does everyone understand or are there still whiners on here. Ok.... Fast forward. Homes are $900k, interest rates are 3.625%. Starting salaries are $65k+. Monthly incomes are $5,400. PITI monthly payment is $4,300.

Which scenario is better? Can you figure it out? The one with income that exceeds the PITI payment or the one who doesn't have the income to afford the PItI?

I think everyone should think about this and quit whining.

Cheers.

[PoppySead]

Originally Posted by bodyforlife99

lol, I guess I would since I'm not planning on having a sex change any time soon. I always wondered what I'd look like in heels.

LMAO!!! Well, then a father in law who I'm hopping doesn't send wedding night instructions to his son.

If he's an adult and doesn't know how to google the best way to save for a home in Frisco then you have more problems than just affordability.

[Ruth4Truth]

Originally Posted by fluffythewondercat

Astonishing advice.

Only chumps buy at the top of the market.

Re-read the OP. There's no advice there to get in at the top of the market. I have no idea where you got that. Astonishing response on your part. I took the general gist of the OP to be along the lines of "live within your means", or "be real about what you can do when you're just starting out". Buying a home is a huge step for most people in the early stages of their career. Not everyone realizes they have to scrimp and save for years, then continue cutting corners in their budget to afford the mortgage until their careers take off and pay increases. I have relatives who bought household supplies, towels, sheets, etc. with trading stamps that they got free at gas stations and elsewhere. You pasted the stamps into booklets, saved them up, and could turn them in for free stuff. This is how people got by back in the 50's and 60's when they wanted a house in the Bay Area. They didn't go out to dinner, didn't buy prepared foods, and didn't take multiple vacations/year, if any, the way some people on C-D claim is normal these days.

I think the OP was trying to connect his kid to reality, nothing more. His advice would apply in many places around the US, it's really not Bay Area-specific. I know couples who lived with family the first years of their marriage, so they could save up for a downpayment on a house, without even knowing where their career would take them. It's good, practical sense: a good way to get started off on an economically stable footing.

[bodyforlife99]

Originally Posted by PoppySead

LMAO!!! Well, then a father in law who I'm hopping doesn't send wedding night instructions to his son.

If he's an adult and doesn't know how to google the best way to save for a home in Frisco then you have more problems than just affordability.

Frisco, lol? Poppy, where are you from originally?

So you want him to "google" the best way. Would that be like getting a Kleenex when I sneeze, or making a Xerox? Normally when I do a search on the internet, I like to run a query on the subject. But I also would like to inform you (and please don't be shocked by this)...not everything on the internet is true. I like to have conversations with people and use my cognitive skills.

[bodyforlife99]

Thank you Ruth. Some people get it and some people don't.

[WithDisp]

Originally Posted by NoMoreSnowForMe

May I add that if you want your son to find a wife who will work and bring in a 2nd income, that you teach your son how to do housework and change diapers so his wife isn't expected to work and take the kid to day care, and do all the shopping, and the cooking and the laundry and pick up the kid and take the kid to soccer practice and piano lessons, then come home and help them with homework and bathe them.....

Because she'll leave him. So, teach him the skills to stay married to a working woman with kids.

A lot of working young women now, though, are choosing not to get married and have kids with a man because they know what it will really be like. They'll be expected to do all of the above and also be beautiful and willing to have sex when he wants it. Young women are deciding all the time if they want to be a working woman with kids, it's easier to do without a husband.

So, maybe your son might want to figure out how to earn twice as much. Just sayin'.

This is an interesting point.
The value of the SAHM.

It isn't going to be differential-driven-based on the location they live, since the skillset of raising a child is roughly the same anywhere in the country.

If SAHM's had a nationally average salary comparable to their worth- they'd be unable to afford to live in the Bay Area, because of it's above national average costs.

I think the OP was just mentioning whatever spouse they choose, or life partner, or just housemate- a two income system is kind of required.

You took it as some personal insult to your gender. Young women would be wise not to get married.

[WithDisp]

Originally Posted by ccm123

Good, prudent advice. This is similar to how we started. We bought our first home (townhouse) in 1995 and sold it for a profit in 1999. Bought a home in 2001 with the proceeds and held into it until 2011 and was able again to sell for a profit. My intention was not to buy and sell for profit, but for a primary residence. Bought our current home in 2012, luckily near the bottom of the market and still living in it today. Our first townhome was not in the best area, but it was a sacrifice we needed to make, in order to buy a home. We've been able to successfully trade up.

Not as relevant today.

You bought and sold at all the right times, which is great- however your entry level home in 1995 is likely no longer available with 'entry level' funds.

The 'sacrifice' needed today- means next to no quality of life, and is only worth it if one's job will matriculate within 5-10 years to something livable. Most careers will not.
The high paying industries pay decent to begin with.
The lower paying sectors at this point do not appear to be catching up.