Question for the single guys in Seattle (tech jobs, to live)

[WiringGuru2]

I know this will probably make me sound like some kind of a pig but I'm a 30 year old single guy and wondering what the dating scene is like. Not just talking hookups but honest dating. In the past I lived in a smaller town that was very insular and I don't want to repeat that same mistake again. I have family in Phoenix, Seattle, Austin and Miami and my job is such that I'm sure I'll find work in each of those places so I am just trying to decide what city will be best for me.

[folkguitarist555]

I think you should be fine due to your age, as Seattle seems to have a load of singles in the 20's to young 30's age range. Helps on what sort of lifestyle you lead as well, as many of those in that age range seem to be more liberal, sort of alternative rock, artsy, free spirited types imo. Many of these folks are highly educated and into pretty fit and holistic lifestyle's, so the more handsome you are, the more fit and healthy are you, your chances will also be better imo. Also you should have a solid career here in Seattle, women will find that to be highly significant in who they date as well, imo. Having said all that, I think you should do fine. The dating realm in Seattle seems to become more exasperating and bizarre for the over 40 crowd for some uncanny reason. Lastly, there is in my opinion, a sort of standoffish, reserved social ethos in Seattle, so you may encounter that. It reminds me a lot of the Midwest actually here in the PNW. As folks will be polite, but not very chatty and outgoing like you might find in Miami and in Austin. I don't think you will find folks inviting you to BBQ's and stuff in Seattle, as folks seem to be more introverted, and less warm and fuzzy. Not knowing your personality type and etc, I am not sure what else to tell you. Nice city, very congested, traffic is rough, housing is high, but one of the more cleaner, and nicer and safer larger cities in the USA with probably the best natural setting. I would also consider Portland OR.

[Interpol76]

The "honest" dating scene is terrible here for guys. Right off the bat, I must warn you Seattle is a complete sausage fest with all the tech jobs. I think the ratio is something like 3 or 4 single dudes for every single girl here. The women here tend to be a bit on the cold/ unfriendly side I have noticed, which can make it very intimidating to talk to them, but also tend to be quite smart. The types of guys that do best here are the bearded horned-rimmed glasses hipster "starving artist" types and the North Face wearing outdoorsy types. You definitely want to have a STYLE or shtick because in Seattle style destroys substance in almost every way possible when it comes to the dating scene. I know some killer dudes with awesome personalities that cant get a date to save their lives because they simply dont have that Seattle "look".

[folkguitarist555]

Just my opinion, as an over 40 dude, there does seem to be a prevailing "look" and a certain "shtick" one ought to possess, in Seattle, to fare better as a single guy. I think the younger aged person will still fare better, at least. I have found women in Seattle, generally speaking to also be aloof, and hard to engage with. It never struck me as the type of place where you just go up to women are start conversing, they don't like space invaders in Seattle, and the guards can go up pretty high, and they are often not amused or comfortable with a man being too forthright, or overly gregarious. Also, because Seattle is pretty high society these days, you should have your ducks all in a row, looks wise, career wise, and lifestyle wise, more or less. I have seen many very attractive women on the same dating sites around Seattle for years, and a few I spoke to over time said they were getting tons of messages each week from men, which I believe adds to it being tough for them to select just one, when there are so many for them to choose from. Whereas single men rarely receive responses to their singles ads on the same dating sites, like maybe one or two a week, if that. I know the more stable, and attractive ladies in Seattle tend to have some pretty high demand lists and criteria, so a man best be in tip top form to compete in Seattle, imo. Funny though, how many women in Seattle do not believe,.. or are just oblivious as to how arduous things can be for single men in the area, nor do they probably care, as they would have died and gone to single men heaven upon arrival in Seattle, imo. Honestly, at least for the older, more blue collar, normal, everyday, non bohemian sort of guy, Seattle can be a lonely place imo. But I think the younger guys, if they do have that certain Seattle "shtick", might be ok there. Again though, for the OP, I would look closer at Portland OR, I have heard lets say "better things" as far as the dating and friendliness aspect, is concerned.

[Flavia84]

The further West you go, the tougher the dating scene for guys.

I'd look into Austin for fun and friendliness, Miami for the "heat factor".

[folkguitarist555]

Yes I have heard Austin was way friendlier and fun, but sure the heck is getting congested there just as Seattle has over the years, brutal traffic etc...

[Flavia84]

Agree, but the OP is asking about the dating scene for a single 30 year old guy, and Austin is the way to go IMHO.

Now, as a chick I'd pick Seattle for sure :-)

[folkguitarist555]

yea Seattle is surely a single gal's paradise...Austin would be awesome I think...too, I wonder how it would be for myself even, just that I am not huge on big metros any more, hell, I should have moved there instead of Seattle some years ago, prior to the mad rush to live there.

[zorph]

OP, I am about to move to Seattle from Miami next month. Just a warning about the dating scene in Miami: it's awful unless you're superficial and into un-intelligent women. My single male friends tell me they need to have lots of money to even get noticed. A good way to pick up most girls here is by flashing your porsch key! Just a warning.

starrider434 and Flavia84: I'm happy about my odds as a single girl who is about to move to Seattle :-)

[branh0913]

I am a formal and classy dresser. I wear nice watches $400 oxfords, $100-200 slacks, $100 button UPS and sports jackets. I'm also 6'4. I find Seattle women like basically more feminine and emasculated men. Guys in skinny jeans looking like women. I will tell you this though, on the other hand, women REALLY don't respect feminine men. So don't be surprised if there is a lot of scandalous behavior amongst the women in Seattle.