Help me convince my wife to move to Sioux Falls? (low crime, how much)

[SandiegotoSF]

Hello Everyone,
I am a South Dakota native and a physician in the Navy and have been living outside of the state for about 12 years. I am leaving the Navy soon and have been offered a very attractive job in Sioux Falls. It really is my dream job and I have a lot of friends & family in the area, but I am having a difficult time convincing my wife to move there. I really want to have her on board and not drag her there against her will. We are in our early 30s (OK, I'm 35 but I'm still claiming early 30s), no children (although probably not far off). My wife is from Washington, DC and we have lived in Okinawa Japan for 2 years and are now in San Diego. She loves San Diego and really wants to stay there but the jobs available there are not attractive. This job is significantly better than anything in California (The Sioux Falls job would actually pay significantly more, better hours, more vacation, better working environment, wonderful colleagues).

She has lived in a big city most of her life and likes all the amenities of a larger city: restaurants, culture, diversity,... I really think Sioux Falls is much better in these departments than she realizes and is only getting better. I have taken her there a few times and she enjoyed it, but it was only passing through and the prospect of living there someday wasn't really on our minds at the time.

The biggest kicker though is that she loves to be outside but really hates the cold; that one's kinda hard to get around. I'm trying to convince her that winter really doesn't last 8 months of the year. This job would afford us the ability to do a fair amount of travel and we really could get away to someplace warm several times per winter. Things are a little more difficult as I am currently deployed in Kuwait until late January. I am going to take her our there as soon as I get back (just in time to show her the dead of winter) and my employer is willing to wait until I come home to give them an answer. I really want to show her everything that Sioux Falls has to offer and try to impress upon her that it is a vibrant, growing city that is only getting better. Any help or suggestions would be greatly appreciated.

Just to give you a idea of things I think she might enjoy, here are a few things I'd like to show her that I think might put Sioux Falls in a positive light:

Washington Pavilion: performing arts, plays, musicals...
Orpheum Theater: jazz & blues, plays,...
Sioux Falls Jazz Fest (anything else like this would be great)
Great Plains Zoo
Yoga studios: (I've found a couple that look really good)
Restaurants (especially ethnic and healthier options: Sushi Masa, Panera, Food & Fermenations, Monk's House of Ale Repute - this place is wonderful if you haven't been there!)

Other things that would be very attractive if you know of anything along these lines:
- Independent Theater or a theater that at least shows some independent films (I realize this one may be a bit off yet).
- Healthy grocery (something along the lines of a "Whole Foods Market")
- adult education: culinary & photography classes
- outdoor activites (more of the warm-weather type: hiking, good places to take the dogs for a walk, boating/kayaking,)

I realize this was quite a long request. Thank you in advance for any suggestions that you can make. I hope to be joining everyone in this wonderful city next summer.

[Chris19]

There are some winters that can be downright cold and even a few weeks in a mild winter, but there are other winters that are mild. Just depends on the winter. Most of the winters in the past 10-15 years have been milder ones. Not sure if its global warming or the weather is just getting warmer (natural cycle). Cold wise, it is usually cold from November to March, but it is temperate to warm during the other times. There is definitely a variety. Like with anywhere else, one has to take the good for the bad. At least we do not have earthquake and hurricane issues.

Sioux Falls has a ton of restuarants and is getting more. We have Japanese restaurants, a Brazillian restuarant, a couple Mongollian grills, several fine dining places, and many more restaurants (Applebees, Chilis, Ruby Tuesdays, along with locally-owned places). There are quite a few excellent Chinese and Mexican restuarants. There is a NY-styled pizzeria downtown, I would love to try sometime. For restaurant choices here, it is getting better and better. Sioux Falls is not horribly isolated and one can go on a couple hour drive to the Twin Cities or Omaha for an occasional bigger city fix.

There are places to buy healthy foods. Hy-Vee is the grocery store that is likely to have the best selection for organic items. The grocery store chain has a natural food selection along with organic produce.

There are adult education classes that I am aware of but do not know much more on the details. University Center and Southeast Tech have classes that one can take also.

As for outdoor activities, there is a bike trail system in Sioux Falls that is growing. A good chunk of it follows the Big Sioux River and there are trails tha shoot off from the Big Sioux River. There are a number of parks in the city to do some hiking and bike riding. Arrowhead Park in east Sioux Falls is a good park to go to if you like a nature preserve. There used to be a town called East Sioux Falls in that general area.

[Jammie]

Hi and welcome to the forum!

I don't mean to give you a negative post right from the start, but......

If your wife hates the cold, she won't be very happy here. I also hate the cold and really am miserable here for at least 6 months of the year. I have never liked it and I feel awful physically and emotionally during the winter.

The best you can hope for is that she will see how much happier and easier your life will be and agree to move. You could probably offer her things like a vehicle with warming seats, a heated garage, the ability to stay home and not have to go out in the cold to get to a job, etc. It still won't make her happy, but it'd be incentive.

DH and I are also polar opposites when it comes to weather. We were both born here and have spent our entire lives here, but I feel more discontent, misery, etc every winter. Getting away to a warmer spot on ocassion doesn't help a lot because you still have to come home to the sub-zero temps and the awful windchills and the piles of snow.

Since you once lived here, are you sure you aren't looking through rose-colored glasses of what it once was like? Our area of the country has many pluses~lowest unemployment rate in the nation, low crime, friendly people, etc. But climate-wise, we're also one of the worst and if it's a concern for your wife before she even moves here, it may not be the best move.

Also, you may not want to visit the zoo until the summertime. Falls Park is also very nice and they have the new Phillips To the Falls Scuplture Walk. Very nice during the summer.

Everything else looks good and I'm sorry that my post isn't more encouraging, but I'm sharing how I feel about being stuck in the frozen tundra . But if you do both agree to move here, you'll be welcomed back with open arms.

[SandiegotoSF]

Thank you for your replies. Jammie, I have been surfing the forum for several days and have read many of your posts in previous threads. I do appreciate your honesty. I would much rather hear opinions on both sides of the fence and I admit that the years do help forget how cold it was. I should mention that we also looked at Minneapolis last winter and she loved it, which really surprised me. If it weren't for that, I probably wouldn't even try to sell her on SF. We really felt that the city did not shut down during the winter just because it was cold out. Of course, I realize that was Minneapolis, which is probably the most active city in the US that has really cold winters. I guess taking her there in January will be the real test. Ironically, the only other time I've showed her around the city was last January. Perhaps not the best planning on my part but unfortunately unavoidable. Thanks again for the input. I would welcome any other comments or suggestions.

[nanjosbrand]

Sioux Falls is AWESOME in the summer. There are always activites every weekend, and the bugs even haven't been to bad due to the city wide spraying.
I have got to say that the winters are awful, but there are things to do even so. The downtown area is starting to add more smoke free nightclubs with the piano bar being one of my favorites. Working out at the gym is a popular thing to do. Movie theaters are packed in the wintertime of course. There are plays and musicals to check out. The Washington Pavilion always has some good shows.
Sometimes in the winter, there can be some occasional 70 degree days. They don't happen very often, but when they do, they are much appreciated.
Some other wonderful things I like about the area is that there are a number of awesome lakes within a two hour drive--Lake Okoboji in Iowa is the best for socialization and the Missouri River lakes are the best for clean water and the other lakes in the area are okay. The population is low so there is never a traffic problem and crime is much lower than any other big city.
Good luck in convincing your wife!

[SandiegotoSF]

Hi Nanjosbrand, thank you. I have heard that there are a lot of activities in the summer. I found the Sioux Falls Jazzfest which sounds like a lot of fun. I think the smoke-free bars & nightclubs is a huge step in the right direction. My sister and her husband have a lake cabin about 2 1/2 hours away so I'm sure we would visit there a lot on weekends, as well as the river and Okoboji. We love to walk with our dogs a lot. Just out of curiosity, do you know of any dogparks in town or areas that people like to walk with their dogs? I was also curious what other type of activities people do in the summer (such as festivals, outdoor concerts, etc.). Thanks!

[SD snowbird]

Jammie and I are the "winter whiners" on this forum, so my post will be mostly on the fence.

I really hate the winters here, Really. But that doesn't mean the city shuts down. Just the opposite. If the city knows that we're going to get more than a dusting of snow, they are out the night before salting and sanding the roads so it's usually not a big deal getting around. The only problem is going anywhere out of town in that kind of weather because the highways and interstates don't get salt/sanded as well as the city streets do. But within a day or two they get them cleared.
Outdoors activities are abundant even in winter, just have to dress for the weather. When you come to visit, get your wife a REALLY warm set of clothes and try Great Bear. Skiing, snowboarding and tubing -- usually you're active enough doing these things that the cold doesn't seem as bad. (or so the men in my family tell me, I stay home where it's warm)
They offer lessons at a reasonable fee.
Summer is great though. Jazz Fest is a blast, Rib Fest is a must (lots of great food and music), we have been getting a lot more concerts, this year we went to RockFest and it was such a good time. The social scene in SF is getting better all the time. Washington Pavillion always has something going on, the Outdoor Campus provides a place for tons of outdoor activities in the summer and winter. The Butterfly House at the Outdoor Campus is open year round and is an awesome place to experience "summer" in the cold weather months. It's like a greenhouse, full of plants and thousands of butterflies, you walk through and enjoy and have butterflies landing on you.
Restaurants around here provide lots of different experiences. There's a whole foods place on the south side of town and a lot of the grocery stores have areas where they sell organic. You'll be able to find what you're looking for.
Yoga -- lots of places. I have a pilates class tomorrow night and the instructor also has yoga classes, I'll get her info and post it for you on Wednesday. She's a lot of fun, and is also on youtube so your wife will actually be able to check her out online before she gets here to see what she thinks.
Visiting in the cold months is a good idea though, remember that you'll have to make it very memorable (in a good way) to have any chance of talking her into it.
Currently I'm working on my husband, trying to get him to move south where it's warm. Guarantee, if we get moved to a warm climate, I'll never move back. We'll be telling the family that if they want us home for Christmas they'll have to do it in August!!

[SD snowbird]

There's an off leash park on north Cliff avenue for the dogs and is usually busy.

[SandiegotoSF]

I'll make sure to have her try Big Bear. We tried cross-country skiing last Christmas and she enjoyed it. I think she would enjoy downhill skiing or tubing. I'll try it on a day that's not too cold.

The Butterfly House sounds like a wonderful idea, especially if it's warm in there in winter. As crazy as it sounds, we've talked about building a home with a solarium (essentially an attached greenhouse) so that will be very interesting to see.

Thank you for offering to get the information about yoga classes. That would be helpful. I did get an e-mail from an instructor at East Bank Yoga that was very helpful and positive about Sioux Falls. One of their instructors actually just moved to SF from San Diego. Thank you.

[MJ1986]

Sandie, you've got a lot of good responses.
Sorry if I missed this, but have you made made a trip to SF recently? Bring your wife to Sioux Falls now, and see how she likes it? Really, the weather isn't bad. It gets cold, and I hate when it gets really cold...but I live through it. Jammie, don't take this the wrong way! Maybe some people just really hate the cold more than others.

On a personal note, maybe you guys should just sit down, and make a pro's and con's of making the move to SF. You and her do your own. That might help . And then discuss your cons...

Wow, I'm starting to sound like Dr. Phil

Let us know if you need any other advice or info