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I'm glad to say when my husband (now deceased) LEFT NC for a small mid-west farm town in Ohio, he was welcomed with open arms....so much so, in 20 years he only went back to NC to visit 3 times, and remained in the midwest untill his death. BTW he was born and raised in NC.
So it works both ways you see....only he was welcomed ...here in NC and SC? we Northerners are not...it's been made very plain to me the entire time I have lived in the South in both NC and SC. So much for the southern hospitallity you all so brag on....it's non-existant as far as I have been able to see.
Is this truly how you wish to present yourself to the world? You do know it's not just a part of the country issue anymore correct? You do realize that the world is truly GLOBAL now, people move and go wherever they wish to....then again maybe you don't know...speaks volumes of your education both in school, home and church.
I am so sorry that you have been treated so poorly in SC (I can't speak for NC). I have had NOTHING but positive experiences since I moved here from Michigan a little over a year ago. I have made several VERY good friends who are natives to the Aiken/Augusta area. (They've even tutored me on some of the ways to "fit in" down here.) The shopkeepers are very polite to me and go out of their way to help me. It is a most pleasant atmosphere that I deal with every day. I had lived in Michigan most of my life, with the exception of 2 years in Texas (HATED it -- you talk about still fighting the Alamo? They ARE!) and 2 years in Ohio (1 in Cinci, which I loved, and 1 in Columbus, which I hated).
No matter where you choose to live, there will be people who dislike you just because of where you came from or what you may or may not represent. The trick is to overlook them, put a smile on your face and KNOW that you have a right to be wherever you want to be. THEY are the ones who are missing out on fabulous friendships if they choose to dislike you before knowing you.
I'm glad to say when my husband (now deceased) LEFT NC for a small mid-west farm town in Ohio, he was welcomed with open arms....so much so, in 20 years he only went back to NC to visit 3 times, and remained in the midwest untill his death. BTW he was born and raised in NC.
So it works both ways you see....only he was welcomed ...here in NC and SC? we Northerners are not...it's been made very plain to me the entire time I have lived in the South in both NC and SC. So much for the southern hospitallity you all so brag on....it's non-existant as far as I have been able to see.
Is this truly how you wish to present yourself to the world? You do know it's not just a part of the country issue anymore correct? You do realize that the world is truly GLOBAL now, people move and go wherever they wish to....then again maybe you don't know...speaks volumes of your education both in school, home and church.
The culture, in a way, defeats itself. Nice people, manners, etc. just make people want to move here (can you blame them?) but they soon begin to effect the culture.
Take your husband moving to Ohio for instance: what local born culture is there that he could effect? Also, last time I checked, NC's culture isn't what's playing on the radio across the US, in movie theaters, and on television. There is a definite Yankee advantage when it comes to that.
I'd really prefer we did not bring the deceased into this argument.
[quote=Palmetto Heel;6720095]1. Clearly your husband wasn't happy in North Carolina and we're glad to be rid of him.
2. If you think that your husband's experience in Ohio is typical of how Southerners are treated in other parts of the US then you are sadly mistaken.
3. Yes, Southern hospitality as you understand it is a myth. I didn't create the myth and I've done nothing to perpetuate it.
If you lose your culture then you've lost your soul. Apparently you and your transplant brethren sold your souls for "cheap" housing and warm weather.
How completely ignorant of a statement for you to make. He came back from VIET NAM saving your life, and was Very very ILL. He had to go North for better care. It is what eventually killed him at a young age.
I came down to take care of family, trust me it has nothing to do with the shabby building codes and cheap housing down here. Weather didn't make a bit of difference to me....it's just as crummy down here in the winter ...only instead of snow, it is incessant rain and fog.
I am so sorry that you have been treated so poorly in SC (I can't speak for NC). I have had NOTHING but positive experiences since I moved here from Michigan a little over a year ago. I have made several VERY good friends who are natives to the Aiken/Augusta area. (They've even tutored me on some of the ways to "fit in" down here.) The shopkeepers are very polite to me and go out of their way to help me. It is a most pleasant atmosphere that I deal with every day. I had lived in Michigan most of my life, with the exception of 2 years in Texas (HATED it -- you talk about still fighting the Alamo? They ARE!) and 2 years in Ohio (1 in Cinci, which I loved, and 1 in Columbus, which I hated).
No matter where you choose to live, there will be people who dislike you just because of where you came from or what you may or may not represent. The trick is to overlook them, put a smile on your face and KNOW that you have a right to be wherever you want to be. THEY are the ones who are missing out on fabulous friendships if they choose to dislike you before knowing you.
You are very correct. Unfortunately, for me, I work a a very small company and don't have the opportunity to meet people in my age group. My co workers are from all over the world, we are a global company, and most of them are 20 years younger than me.
I only know one neighbor who is originally from Charlotte, but he hates northern people as well. He talks to me, but he's always says these damn yankees did this and that, and I try to explain to him, as being the one who helps him out when he's out of town etc, that I am also from the North.
Then he looks at me with big eyes, like geez, I forgot that. Never says he is sorry. So I guess I'm good enough to use, to help him out, but not good enough for anything else.
It's ok, I know I'm a good person, I don't need anyone to tell me that.
However, I know I'd like to leave, my caring for family is done, so I plan to hopefully sell and move.
[quote=SoxSoxSox;6714797]I'm sorry you give your region such a bad name! Thank goodness most of the people we know are nothing like you.[/quote]
Not to your face, anyway. You've likely gotten a few "Bless his/her heart" when you're out of earshot.
Quote:
Originally Posted by Mrs. P
I'm glad to say when my husband (now deceased) LEFT NC for a small mid-west farm town in Ohio, he was welcomed with open arms....so much so, in 20 years he only went back to NC to visit 3 times, and remained in the midwest untill his death. BTW he was born and raised in NC.
Ma'am, first I'd like to thank your husband for his service. Second, my explanation for his feeling uncomfortable is this. Some people, whether born Southerners or not, dont have the personality to fit in to the culture, even if they are raised in it. Dunno if that makes any sense, but its likely the case with your husband.
Quote:
Originally Posted by Mrs. P
So it works both ways you see....only he was welcomed ...here in NC and SC? we Northerners are not...it's been made very plain to me the entire time I have lived in the South in both NC and SC. So much for the southern hospitallity you all so brag on....it's non-existant as far as I have been able to see..
No, to the natives, Northerners are generally not welcome.We dont always make that plain, but apparently you've gotten ahold of the more honest ones. We'll smile and take your money, but in all honesty alot of natives are suspicious of transplants. We are afraid you'll change our home into what you left.
Southern hospitality exists...but even that has its limits.
Quote:
Originally Posted by Mrs. P
Is this truly how you wish to present yourself to the world? You do know it's not just a part of the country issue anymore correct? You do realize that the world is truly GLOBAL now, people move and go wherever they wish to....then again maybe you don't know...speaks volumes of your education both in school, home and church.
From my understanding, the South has for many, many years never wanted to really "present" anything to the world. It has simply wanted to be left alone.
Quote:
Originally Posted by Mrs. P
You are very correct. Unfortunately, for me, I work a a very small company and don't have the opportunity to meet people in my age group. My co workers are from all over the world, we are a global company, and most of them are 20 years younger than me.
I only know one neighbor who is originally from Charlotte, but he hates northern people as well. He talks to me, but he's always says these damn yankees did this and that, and I try to explain to him, as being the one who helps him out when he's out of town etc, that I am also from the North. Then he looks at me with big eyes, like geez, I forgot that. Never says he is sorry. So I guess I'm good enough to use, to help him out, but not good enough for anything else.
Take that as a compliment.He hates Yankees but forgets that you are one. It means you've been accepted by somebody.
I'm sorry you give your region such a bad name! Thank goodness most of the people we know are nothing like you.[/quote]
Not to your face, anyway. You've likely gotten a few "Bless his/her heart" when you're out of earshot.
Ma'am, first I'd like to thank your husband for his service. Second, my explanation for his feeling uncomfortable is this. Some people, whether born Southerners or not, dont have the personality to fit in to the culture, even if they are raised in it. Dunno if that makes any sense, but its likely the case with your husband.
No, to the natives, Northerners are generally not welcome.We dont always make that plain, but apparently you've gotten ahold of the more honest ones. We'll smile and take your money, but in all honesty alot of natives are suspicious of transplants. We are afraid you'll change our home into what you left.
Southern hospitality exists...but even that has its limits.
From my understanding, the South has for many, many years never wanted to really "present" anything to the world. It has simply wanted to be left alone.
Take that as a compliment.He hates Yankees but forgets that you are one. It means you've been accepted by somebody.
You always put a good, honest "spin" on things. YOU are what I picture as a true Southern Gentleman.
If you lose your culture then you've lost your soul. Apparently you and your transplant brethren sold your souls for "cheap" housing and warm weather.
How completely ignorant of a statement for you to make. He came back from VIET NAM saving your life, and was Very very ILL. He had to go North for better care. It is what eventually killed him at a young age.
I came down to take care of family, trust me it has nothing to do with the shabby building codes and cheap housing down here. Weather didn't make a bit of difference to me....it's just as crummy down here in the winter ...only instead of snow, it is incessant rain and fog.
Your troubles in the South sound to be nothing but your own problem. You act as though the South is still 100 years behind the rest of the country, but you're clearly living blindly. I know plenty of people from Ohio, who have made the move. Oddly enough they have many friends and are happy. I guess when you try to be accepted and don't find 'flaws' with everything you encounter, maybe you too could be happy. You shouldn't bring your personal problems on here and try to pass them off as other people's issues. Your failures are clearly your own doing.
As for the building codes-- once again, your own ignorance is showing. South Carolina, as well as North Carolina, use the same International building codes as the rest of the country.
For the record, I originally posted standing up for tolerance of people moving to the South and not fulfilling stereotypes, but I can't stand by and let some failure at life continually pass untrue remarks as fact.
I get a kick out of this thread since allot of us yankees have the same gripes as those who live in the south. That is the very reason why so many of us are relocating down south. I was born and raised in upstate NY and would like to stay here but the high cost of living and taxes make it unrealistic to stay and eventually retire here. I am frustrated just like allot of people I know in NY about those that blindly support or support out of ignorance the never ending expansion of government, government services and the resulting higher taxes. You cannot just be left alone from the local, county and state government services loving money grubbers up here which is the point of looking at states like South Carolina.
Whenever friends and I discuss the south and those that made the move and have returned, it always goes back to just not being accepted because we are yankees. This despite we have the same gripes in common people decide to just to lump us altogether. This is probably one of the biggest fears of making a move south.
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