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Sorry to post this as a reply, I couldn't figure out how to start up a new thread.
Firstly, I will say that we live in the UK but then, the internet makes everyone only a few seconds away and I am sure that the problems we face are global.
I am a divorced mum of two wonderful sons aged 13 and 14. My eldest was diagnosed with ADHD and OCD at 5, Autistic Spectrum Disorder (specifically Aspergers Syndrome) at 10 and is now undergoing assessment for Dyspraxia. He also has a herditary condition which has resulted in 2 bouts of surgery over the past 12 months and we have just been told he will need 2 more operations over the next couple of months.
My big problem at the moment is that I am being harassed by his school. I believe that it is because I successfully took them to our High Court to get a Statement of Special Educational Needs (which they had refused to give him) and then subsequently had 3 complaints upheld over their failure to implement the care that they were paid for under this SEN, resulting in my son becoming chronically school phobic over the unaddressed bullying etc.
They are now taking me to court over my son's absences as they are only allowing 60% attendance for the periods that my son was recouperating from surgery. He is due to start work experience in April next year, he has found a placement working in a rescue centre with abandoned animals and injured wildlife (he has a natural gift with animals). As he now has to undergo 2 more periods of surgery, I am scared that the school are going to refuse him the placement as he will not meet the 95% attendance criteria. It will destroy him.
Sorry, prevaracating. I guess what I am trying to say is that this ignorance is universal and that people don't realise what we go through every day. I have worked hard to let my son lead a normal life, mainstream school supported by (I thought) a support package sealed through the Courts. My son is not someone who needs to be segregated from society like some anti-social yob. I believe that he is perfectly able to survive in mainstream with the right support and he is a wonderful, wonderful, loving child who still give the best cuddles in the world (parental priviledge speaking here guys). He has his occasional issues, he is short tempered, cries too easily, throws/kicks things etc. He has really adjusted to the new school year and has made a really good friend.
I work full time, my company have been great, I work half time at the office and half time at home so I can do the after school child care. If the school take me to court, I will lose my job, my home, everything.
Sorry to twitter on but I am so tired with it all now, 14 years of fighting has taken it's toll.
My questions, am I wrong to keep my son in mainstream, should I put him in a unit where he will mix with other kids with severe behavioural disorders before the school take me to court? Am I wrong to want him to mix with 'normal' kids so he has more appropriate role models, am I fighting the wrong battles here?
Sorry to post this as a reply, I couldn't figure out how to start up a new thread.
Firstly, I will say that we live in the UK but then, the internet makes everyone only a few seconds away and I am sure that the problems we face are global.
I am a divorced mum of two wonderful sons aged 13 and 14. My eldest was diagnosed with ADHD and OCD at 5, Autistic Spectrum Disorder (specifically Aspergers Syndrome) at 10 and is now undergoing assessment for Dyspraxia. He also has a herditary condition which has resulted in 2 bouts of surgery over the past 12 months and we have just been told he will need 2 more operations over the next couple of months.
My big problem at the moment is that I am being harassed by his school. I believe that it is because I successfully took them to our High Court to get a Statement of Special Educational Needs (which they had refused to give him) and then subsequently had 3 complaints upheld over their failure to implement the care that they were paid for under this SEN, resulting in my son becoming chronically school phobic over the unaddressed bullying etc.
They are now taking me to court over my son's absences as they are only allowing 60% attendance for the periods that my son was recouperating from surgery. He is due to start work experience in April next year, he has found a placement working in a rescue centre with abandoned animals and injured wildlife (he has a natural gift with animals). As he now has to undergo 2 more periods of surgery, I am scared that the school are going to refuse him the placement as he will not meet the 95% attendance criteria. It will destroy him.
Sorry, prevaracating. I guess what I am trying to say is that this ignorance is universal and that people don't realise what we go through every day. I have worked hard to let my son lead a normal life, mainstream school supported by (I thought) a support package sealed through the Courts. My son is not someone who needs to be segregated from society like some anti-social yob. I believe that he is perfectly able to survive in mainstream with the right support and he is a wonderful, wonderful, loving child who still give the best cuddles in the world (parental priviledge speaking here guys). He has his occasional issues, he is short tempered, cries too easily, throws/kicks things etc. He has really adjusted to the new school year and has made a really good friend.
I work full time, my company have been great, I work half time at the office and half time at home so I can do the after school child care. If the school take me to court, I will lose my job, my home, everything.
Sorry to twitter on but I am so tired with it all now, 14 years of fighting has taken it's toll.
My questions, am I wrong to keep my son in mainstream, should I put him in a unit where he will mix with other kids with severe behavioural disorders before the school take me to court? Am I wrong to want him to mix with 'normal' kids so he has more appropriate role models, am I fighting the wrong battles here?
I would continue to fight for mainstreaming with supports, such as a full time aide.
Regarding absence for surgery/recuperation, perhaps a tutor at home could help? The school may be able to provide one but just aren't telling you. It's not like he's out skipping school just because; he has a real medical excuse.
Good luck with it, and I would also recommend looking for an advocate who could help you sort this out.
I'm not sure exactly what the law is in the UK, but here in the US we have a law called Individuals with Disabilities Education Act (IDEA). It states that children with disabilities must receive a free and appropriate education in the least restrictive environment. Children with disabilities are identified early on usually at birth or before age three, and the family is provided with supports and followed until their child starts school. Then the home school takes over. Each year thereafter, a team composed of an administrator, a general education teacher, an education specialist, any other specialist that provides services, a representative of any social service agency following the child, the parent(s), and the child if he/she is old enough, meets to develop an Individual Education Plan (IEP) for the child. Goals must be set which support the child progressing in their education. Once the child gets to a certain age, a transition plan must be put in place which helps the child transition to adulthood and productivity to the greatest extent possible. If the child has to miss school due to their disabling condition, then the home school must continue to provide FAPE (free and appropriate public education) while the child recovers. I heard from someone who lives in the UK that they don't have anything like this there. So, I'm not sure how to advise you. However, I can tell you that what they are doing would be illegal here.
I am not sure how things work there, but if it were me in your situation, I'd make an appointment with someone on the school board. I would explain to them my situation and ask for help. If they refuse, I'd go to the next member, on and on. If I were really desperate, I'd go to the media. Human interest with a special needs child and injured wildlife..... any reporter looking to make a name for themselves would jump right in.
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