Will we fit in? (Memphis, Franklin: loans, houses, neighborhood)

[irieblue]

Actually, I hear the civil war discussed alot;>) We are near Shiloh, and there are many here who are proud of their state's heritage and what their ancestors did. One told us about the relatives he had fighting on both sides! It's more about geneology than who won, though.

[Dd714]

Post your dress and shoe size so we will know if you will FIT IN or not.

Really, we get the "will a yankee fit in the south" posts weekly, mostly from people that watch to many reruns of "The Dukes of Hazard". Do you seriously think, in 2007, with our global society, it matters?

[daniellefort]

Originally Posted by Dd714

Do you seriously think, in 2007, with our global society, it matters?

Unfortuneately yes for some people it does matter. That's just the way some people are. they don't want anyone else but their own kind in their space. Me? I could care less. We should all just get along, keep peace with each other and not snub those who move to the area just because they don't fit in with the rest, have a different outlook on life, maybe have a different religion than you or whatever the difference may be. It's nobody's place to say you don't belong and i think those people who decide to snub others are the ones who make others feel like they don't belong which brings up these kinds of threads. Point being, we shouldn't have to ask "will we fit in" but unfortuneately in todays' society, we have to.

[Dd714]

Originally Posted by daniellefort

Unfortuneately yes for some people it does matter. That's just the way some people are. they don't want anyone else but their own kind in their space. Me? I could care less. We should all just get along, keep peace with each other and not snub those who move to the area just because they don't fit in with the rest, have a different outlook on life, maybe have a different religion than you or whatever the difference may be. It's nobody's place to say you don't belong and i think those people who decide to snub others are the ones who make others feel like they don't belong which brings up these kinds of threads. Point being, we shouldn't have to ask "will we fit in" but unfortuneately in todays' society, we have to.

Yeah but, I think people make a bigger deal of it then it is. Now some communities and some less tolerent neighborhoods may only want a certain type of person, race, religion, etc. But that is getting into specifics.
The original poster is talking about a whole region of the U.S. and her question is very general and lets face it, this question is asked weekly and it's somewhat insulting to me - as if they assume we still have daily lynchings, confederate flags waving everywhere, lack of plumbing, and toothless inbreds running around.
Blame TV for giving an unrealistic vision of the south. I've been in 45 states of the U.S., lived in 5. I can't tell the difference between suburban Memphis and suburban Cleveland. Same McDonald's on the corner, same shopping mall loaded with teenagers, same newscasters on TV with chromed hairdoes, same bad traffic during rush hour. I generally don't discuss politics and religion with neighbors so that doesn't effect me.

[sliverbox]

I think the only reason people in the South have issues sometimes with others from out of state is mainly to do with the different ways that people communicate with one another in various national regions. I've lived all over and in my experience, Southerners like myself tend to use a narrative style of conversation. The way it works is that you are talking with somebody as usual. The topic is about changing the oil in your truck.

The person from NY might say:

"yes. I change my oil. 4 quarts and I'm done".

The Southerner would say:

" Make sure and get some cat litter before you change your oil because boy I tell you what, one time I was changing mine and I spilt 2 quarts all over the garage! and as for my truck, I usually use 4 quarts, but my dad drove it low on oil a few years back and now it burns a little. So I put in an extra quart. By the way, I ever told you about the time I..."

Southerners LOVE to tell stories about everything. It makes sense if you think about it. We came from an oral tradition where instructions were passed down by word of mouth. When we encounter many people from Up North, who often come from Stoic German stock, they have conversations that border absolute minimum. Whatever most efficiently completes the sentence is deemed acceptable. But to Southerners, this seems rude and cold.

So in my opinion, both groups misunderstand people. We just have different ways of talking, and more than just an accent.

[alleycat]

Originally Posted by sliverbox

The Southerner would say:

" Make sure and get some cat litter before you change your oil because boy I tell you what, one time I was changing mine and I spilt 2 quarts all over the garage! and as for my truck, I usually use 4 quarts, but my dad drove it low on oil a few years back and now it burns a little. So I put in an extra quart. By the way, I ever told you about the time I..."

If I converted that into the way my mother would tell it, it would take three pages. And you'd get to hear about Aunt Margaret's gall bladder surgery, her frustrated efforts to find a new shower curtain in light blue, and a brief review of all the doctors in Clarksville, Tennessee.

;-)

[akm4]

I LOVE this place

[mbmouse]

I agree! In Ct, I was told I talk to much, here in TN some folks think I am too quiet LOL!!!

[DannoCO]

Originally Posted by Dd714

Yeah but, I think people make a bigger deal of it then it is. Now some communities and some less tolerent neighborhoods may only want a certain type of person, race, religion, etc. But that is getting into specifics.
The original poster is talking about a whole region of the U.S. and her question is very general and lets face it, this question is asked weekly and it's somewhat insulting to me - as if they assume we still have daily lynchings, confederate flags waving everywhere, lack of plumbing, and toothless inbreds running around.
Blame TV for giving an unrealistic vision of the south. I've been in 45 states of the U.S., lived in 5. I can't tell the difference between suburban Memphis and suburban Cleveland. Same McDonald's on the corner, same shopping mall loaded with teenagers, same newscasters on TV with chromed hairdoes, same bad traffic during rush hour. I generally don't discuss politics and religion with neighbors so that doesn't effect me.

Dd714,

I sure didn't mean to be insulting, and I'm sorry if i came across that way. The only states I haven't visited in the continental US are MS, AL, and LA. I've lived in 8 states, including VA. I never in a million years would have assumed you have daily lynchings, or lack indoor plumbing. In fact, I don't think I would have even asked my original question, except that there ARE so many threads about an "anti north" type of sentiment. It made me hesitate, so I thought I would ask you, the experts from this forum, what the real deal is. I can relocate almost anywhere in the country because of the type of work I do.

I have to disagree about not being able to tell the difference between two cities. If you spend anytime at all in one, you begin to see differences. I was asking about two specific cities in my original post because I have never visited them. I have however visited other places in the south (and north for that matter) where I did not feel welcome. If I'm going to relocate my family of 7 you can be sure I'm going to do my research and ask some questions to avoid places like that. We can move somewhere else. If you're telling me its not that big of a deal, then I'll take you at your word .

[Firefighterdon]

I think possibly one reason the "will I fit in" question is being asked is that in at least our area (which was very rural at one time) we've been inundated from people from the city that then want to change everything to what they left behind. Consequently, they don't fit in with the people who grew up in this area, although there are few of us left at this point. They come to the country with all kinds of city attitudes, complain about the commute time back to the city to work, complain about the lack of things to do, etc. As anyone from the country knows there are a ton of things to do, but unfortunately for these city types, unless they can spend money doing it, to them there is nothing to do. Forget about nature, hiking, hunting, fishing, photography, and all of the other things. I think a lot of the people that are looking to relocate are probably like us. We want country and are certainly not looking to change anything!