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Old 02-10-2007, 11:57 AM
 
Location: South Bay, California
1,703 posts, read 6,466,186 times
Reputation: 342

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"The Land of Pick-Up Trucks"
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Old 03-01-2007, 04:45 PM
 
8 posts, read 27,433 times
Reputation: 11
"You may all go to hell...but I will go to Texas." Davy Crockett
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Old 03-01-2007, 06:00 PM
 
Location: Johns Island, SC
797 posts, read 2,991,574 times
Reputation: 1096
"Turn around, don't drown!"
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Old 03-07-2007, 12:19 PM
 
Location: DFW area
1,197 posts, read 3,581,414 times
Reputation: 413
Default quote

One of my favorites from a native Texan but I'm now living in TN.
" I wasn't born in Texas but I got here as fast as I could." HOOK EM HORNS!
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Old 03-12-2007, 12:52 PM
 
264 posts, read 1,184,156 times
Reputation: 111
"When I die, I may not go to Heaven. I don't know if they let cowboys in. If they don't just let me go to Texas, cuz Texas is as close as I've been."

I'm in Texas about to move to Colorado, and this thread is making me soooo sad!
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Old 03-13-2007, 03:15 PM
 
Location: San Antonio-Westover Hills
6,884 posts, read 20,401,094 times
Reputation: 5176
Quote:
Originally Posted by SA Greed View Post
There is a long quote/joke about someone moving to NY and how beautiful they thought it was when it snowed but as time grew on they started to hate the snow and the snow plower guy. I can't remember it exactly but it very funny.

Here it is!!

WARNING: LANGUAGE (I tried to curtail it with asterisks)

A Texan Moves North

January 10

It's 5:00PM. It's starting to snow. The first of the season and the first one we've seen in years. The wife and I took our hot buttered rum and sat by the picture window watching the soft flakes drift down, clinging to the trees and covering the ground. It was so beautiful.

January 11

We woke to a lovely blanket of crystal white snow covering the landscape. What a fantastic sight. Every tree and shrub covered with a beautiful mantle. I shoveled snow for the first time in my life and loved it. I did both the driveway and the sidewalk. Later a snow plow came along and accidentally covered up the driveway with compacted snow from the street. The driver waved and smiled. I waved back and shoveled again.

January 12

It snowed an additional 5 inches last night and the temp has dropped to 11 degrees. Several tree limbs have snapped in the snow. I shoveled the drive again. Shortly afterwards the snowplow came. Now the snow is a brownish-gray.

January 13

It warmed enough today to cause slush which froze again when the temp dropped. Bought snow tires for both cars. Fell on my ass in the driveway. $145.00 to a chiropractor. Nothing broken. More snow.

January 14

Still cold as hell. Sold the wife's car. Bought a 4x4 to get her to work. Slid into a guardrail anyways, considerable damage. Another 8 inches of snow last night. Both vehicles covered with salt and crud. More shoveling for me. That God-da*ned snowplow came twice today.

January 15

It's 2 frickin' degrees outside. More da*ned snow. Not a tree on our property hasn't been damaged. Power was off most of the night. Tried to keep from freezing to death with candles and a kerosene heater, which tipped over and nearly burned the freaking house down. Managed to put out the flames but suffered 2nd degree burns on my hands plus lost all my eyelashes and eyebrows. Car slid off the road on the way to the emergency room and totaled it.

January 16

More motherfu*king god-da*ned white sh*t keeps coming down. Have to put on all the clothes we own just to get to the fu*king mailbox. If I ever catch the son-of-a-bi*ch who drives that fu*king snowplow, I'll chew open his chest and rip out his heart. I think he hides around the corner till I shovel. Power still off. Roof has started to cave in.

January 17

Six more fu*king inches of fu*king white sh*t and fu*king sleet and no tellin' what the fu*k else fell last night. I wounded the fu*king snowplow as*hole with an ice axe, but he got away. Wife left me. The car won't start. I think I'm going snowblind. I can't feel my fu*king toes. Haven't seen the sun in weeks. More white sh*t forecast. Wind chill is 22 below.

I'm moving my a*s back to Texas.
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Old 03-15-2007, 11:03 AM
 
Location: San Antonio
37 posts, read 119,482 times
Reputation: 14
RE: Texan moves North

roflol!

That is an absolutely perfect description of Michigan, and everyone else up here!
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Old 03-15-2007, 11:49 AM
 
7 posts, read 20,628 times
Reputation: 10
Default No Quote

Quote:
Originally Posted by mystree66 View Post
Favorite quote by me...Awww Texas..I wanna go
Seen a lot of states.........Need to be back in Texas Sc got to go...
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Old 03-15-2007, 12:26 PM
 
Location: Perth, Western Australia
9,589 posts, read 27,798,681 times
Reputation: 3647
Funny story Mom2Feebs!

That's one of the reasons I love 100 F; it's impossible to feel cold.

Winters here are colder, but not quite that severe; trees rarely snap, the power almost never gets knocked out. But everything else is pretty accurate.
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Old 03-18-2007, 12:51 AM
 
Location: In Christ
246 posts, read 649,240 times
Reputation: 137
Smile surprised no one submitted this one...

All my ex's live in TX - and TX is the place I really long to be (George Strait)
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