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I applied for a job at a new business where I know the owner. He seemed very interested in hiring me despite my lack of experience. He even made it sound like he was planning on hiring me. He told me several times that he would contact me when he began the interview process.
I waited and waited and heard nothing. So I checked out his website and he's already filled all the positions and his new business is up and running. Since I know him, I at least thought he would contact me to tell me the positions had been filled.
I don't know if he forgot about me or sent me an email and it never came through (got lost). I'm really upset here. I think it's more because when he talked to me, he made it sound like the job was mine. Then he said he would call and he never did. I thought I could trust the guy to keep his word. I've known him for five years. So I guess I'm upset because HE got my hopes up and then HE crushed them. If he had no intention of hiring me, he should have never said the things he said to me. It's like implying to a child that you're going to buy them that expensive toy they want, but in the end you never buy it for them and they're crushed because you implied you were going to buy it.
I still need to do business with the guy. I need to send him an email. I'm not sure if I should mention anything about the job in the email or not. I thought about adding a line about how I was disappointed that he never contacted me like he said he would. Is it ok to say something like that? I feel like I need to address the issue with him or it's going to be like "an elephant in the room."
It happens all the time. It always happened to me when I was freelancing/sub-contracting. I had too many potential clients just wasting my time because there really was no a job, they were testing the market, or they hired someone else that would do the job for less than I would. I hate to sound impetuous but suck it up and move on.
I would gladly "suck it up and move on" if the owner was someone I didn't know. It's because I know him, because I know there was a job opening, because he implied I would get the job, and because he told me he'd contact me and he didn't that I'm upset. It doesn't bother me that much that I didn't get the job. It bothers me because I at least thought he'd let me know what was going on.
If this had happened with someone I didn't know, I wouldn't care. I would have just thought they were telling me all that stuff just to pacify me. But I trusted this man to be honest. And because I still have to do business with him, I'm not sure what to say to him when I contact him.
I once had a guy tell me I had the job in the interview and then when I got home (all of a 30 min drive) he told me he'd decided to go with another guy.
Happens. Sucks in this economy. In better times, you'd have another offer to lean on like I did back then.
It happened to me too. I had an interview, and sent the guy a thank you email. He replied, and said that he anticipated contacting me after his vacation the next week. I never heard another word from him.
Ok, I understand what you all are saying and I appreciate your thoughts on the matter, but I feel like you're missing the point.
Most people apply and interview for jobs somewhere where they don't know the boss. They're strangers. I would expect the boss to tell people they're interested in them just to pacify them. My case is different. I know the boss personally and have known him for years. I expect things to be different. Since he's been treating me differently this whole time, I expect for him to be honest with me.
Don't you expect for people you know to treat you differently (be more honest) than strangers? I'm not asking for special treatment from him, but it irks me that he lied to me.
I feel like you all are responding to my posts without even reading what I wrote.
Ok, I understand what you all are saying and I appreciate your thoughts on the matter, but I feel like you're missing the point.
Most people apply and interview for jobs somewhere where they don't know the boss. They're strangers. I would expect the boss to tell people they're interested in them just to pacify them. My case is different. I know the boss personally and have known him for years. I expect things to be different. Since he's been treating me differently this whole time, I expect for him to be honest with me.
Don't you expect for people you know to treat you differently (be more honest) than strangers? I'm not asking for special treatment from him, but it irks me that he lied to me.
I feel like you all are responding to my posts without even reading what I wrote.
I read your posts and IMO I think you should do what you suggested in your first post. Say something about it.
You don't have to be rude about it, but as you say you're disappointed in the way this was handled. Let him know that.
You said you have to do business with him, so you need to speak up.
You could say something like they if he had no intention of hiring you I would have appreciated an honest answer upfront since we have an existing business relationship.
Clearly this is bothering you(and I understand why), so say something about it.
You do have to clear the air. I would say something along the line of "Since I haven't heard from you, I assume someone else was chosen for the job. Naturally, I'm very disappointed but look forward to continuing to work with you in the future." (You don't say what your exact 'working relationship' with this employer is.)
Anyway, that should clear the elephant from the from so you both can go forward. Most employers disappoint these days. Don't take it personally.
Last edited by Ariadne22; 09-09-2011 at 02:13 PM..
Why haven't you contacted him somewhere along the way to follow up? I've posted before that hiring managers really don't like random applicants calling or stopping in to follow up on their applications, but this is a different situation. He may have found someone more qualified and, when you didn't follow up, just assumed that you weren't interested in the position. and hired someone else
If you're still interested I'd go ahead and follow up. Don't throw out the whole story you've told here, just say "Hey, just wondered if you still think you might have a position for me." Being a new startup it could be that he just hasn't needed anyone in the position he had you in mind for.
And if you need to do business with him, definitely keep this issue completely separate. No good result will come of mixing the two issues.
Good luck.
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