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man, that's great! you have a very positive impression and understanding of women in washington. you must go to some of the best bars. i never really went for those online dating sites tho.
I don't do the club scene. I like nice venues that aren't too pretentious. I find that women usually outnumber men at the places I go to. Clubs are always full of guys and the talent may be fun to look at but you're not going to meet a woman you can take home to mom. DC is loaded with hot women who are educated. That's one of the reasons I'm moving back.
I have been lurking on these DC dating threads for the longest time and have done a great deal of thinking about this topic. As a 30 year old SWM, I can provide my experiences in the DC/NoVA dating scene over the last 3 years or so. Figured I’d just put some random talking points on here and go from there. Keep in mind that this is from a straight white guy’s perspective.
Online dating: Look, let’s face it…online dating just doesn’t work well in DC. Never has and never will. It may work in Chicago, St. Louis or San Diego, but it doesn’t work here. I have tried all the sites such as eHarmony, match, POF, OKC and yes, even CL. I am unable to explain why online dating seems to fail here and not in other places. At first I thought that maybe it was just me and I was doing something wrong…but I later learned that a lot of my male colleagues and friends shared the same issues with online dating. Every woman I talk to online mentions that she rarely checks the site and that her mailbox is usually filled to the brim with messages from guys trying to get laid. In all honesty, I don’t know how well it works for the ladies but for the guys…skip it
More women than men: Yep, it’s true…even if you can’t see it in the sausage-fests that inhabit most bars and nightclubs in DC. Women are everywhere and most of them are single. Hell, my office is 90% female in what was once a male-dominated field just a few years back. Women are taking DC by storm and us guys just have to deal with that. Some people say it is like shooting fish in a barrel for guys here, but no, it isn’t. Most women in DC have a high set of standards and most are highly accomplished…guys have to keep up
Busy: Everyone is so damn busy and preoccupied with something whether it is yoga, or happy hour or brunch or whatever. PLUS, DC is a working town and many people are married to their jobs. In my experience, it seems damn-near impossible to make time for a date these days. Something always comes up or gets in the way. The last thing most guys want is a woman who is married to her job. Sorry ladies…
Status counts: As much as people try and stay humble and down to earth on this board, let’s face it…status counts in DC whether you like it or not. You school…your job…your car and where you live all serve as focal points when meeting women in DC. This has been discussed numerous times on City-Data. Your “status” will almost certainly affect your dating life in this area. That’s just something guys have to get used to...
Content with the single life: Now, this article came out a few days ago in the Post talking about how single women in DC are happier than women elsewhere. I bet the economic bubble here plays a large role and also the growing amount of opportunity women in their 20s and 30s here in DC have compared to their male counterparts. Seems to me that most single professional ladies in DC are quite content and don’t really need a guy around. Most are happy going to brunch and happy hour with their single gal pals and having a blast together. If it came between giving up their phone or giving up being with a guy for a year….they’d all give up the guy
Dating outside your race: Look, this board has had numerous discussions about dating and the racial thing eventually gets tossed into the mix. For me, DC has an amazing amount of beautiful non-white women, so a lot of guys need to expand their horizons. I see amazingly beautiful Asian and AA females all the time in DC and NoVA…you will probably see a lot more interracial dating here than in most American cities.
Best (and worst) places to meet women: Well, I always thought that the non-bar/non-online dating route works best for meeting women in DC. Usually sports leagues such as kickball or soccer seems to work well. Maybe even social clubs for hobbyists such as a photography class or museum tours. A big gamble is meeting women at work…they say it isn’t a good idea to date at work, but for me, it is tempting because I work with so many single ladies.
Overall, I find DC to be a great place to meet women. I do agree that in any city setting (especially DC) women are much more independent and could care less about dating for the most part. They have fun with their girlfriends. I dated one of those in Atlanta and it went nowhere. I'm not sure about the whole status thing. Overall, everyone is different. Some women could care less about status while others are very superficial in what they want. I think a lot of it comes down to maturity. I find DC to be a melting pot of people and have always had luck meeting attractive women who are up to going on dates to see where it goes. I have had many comment that men in DC aren't aggressive enough. If you can approach a woman you're interested in in DC and make her laugh you'll find that many are very welcoming. Of course you're going to meet your bad apples who are superficial but they are a small minority that I avoid.
You don't mention how tall you are, but in Online Dating, a guy's height is a major factor when it comes to women 22-30 (it's much less so in regular life like you said).
Well I'm 5'8" and get a very low response rate online and I know my height is a factor. Women in that age range tend to be very shallow and obviously aren't looking for something long-term if they act that way. The online avenue definitely doesn't work for a lot of people because it's a really superficial way of meeting people. I mean you look at pics and judge if they're your type or not by their pics. I have gone out with some women who look good in pics and awful in person and some who don't look great in their pics and are very attractive in person. Meeting in person is definitely the way to go and from experience it's the only way to go in DC.
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