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I am a single mum of 43years old and I am moving from the UK to NYC in work. My daughter, 6 yrs old, will move with me and I have been thinking for us to settle down in Westchester. After reading some of the threads here I must say I am uncertain as it seems life after work is very limited for someone my age and single.
Schools are important, and I have looked at some of the smaller places including Irvington with great schools, a community feel and with beautiful houses within our price range.
I would love to hear your comments. Life as a single (highly educated, non-white) mum in Westchester, is it absolutely boring and isolated or is the atmosphere more inclusive. I don't normally go out a huge amount unless connected to work(which tends to be very busy) but clearly would like to make friends, meet people etc
I'm not going to sugar coat it, it's hard to make friends in the suburbs as a single mom - I'm in about the same boat as you. The majority of people you meet will be married couples - and they tend to want to spend time together with their kids on the weekends. I've lived in the suburbs for a few years now and I've only just started to get friendly with more moms in my area (my child is almost 4). I think socially it would be easier to be in the city. The upside of the suburb is you can settle in a place with a great school district and not have to worry about NYC schools. I much prefer to have my child grow up here, even it it means me having to give up on some social life. As for being isolated, it's probably partially a function of your personality and the flavor of the neighborhood.
You can always socialize with the dads of your daughter's friends. LOL!
On the flip side, it does not mean you cannot do well in the city. Depending on your budget, you might be able to live in an area of Manhattan or Brooklyn that has a good elementary school - Park Slope, Upper East Side, etc. It will also be easier to maintain an apartment than a SFH if you are by yourself.
It all depends on how you want to manage your household.
We used to live in central London but moved out a year ago to the suburbs. I think you have the same trouble here - but I also like the fresh air etc. it get very claustrophobic with office and home in the city.
See if you can make Park Slope, Brooklyn work. There's a beautiful park there (Prospect Park), local schools are good, and tons of shopping and dining you can walk to, plus easy commute into the city by subway.
Try to stay in the city, not the suburbs. You will basically only be exposed to parents of classmates in suburbia, with no other options except online dating. Also, the demographic of single men in Westchester is more working class like cops and tradesmen.
try queens, it has great public schools where first graders enrolled in Chinese, where there are parks within a block for interaction with your community, public transportation is key, make sure your near a train with an elevator for baby carriages and carts.
Westchester , where i have lived for my life , is only worthwhile as a single parent or young parents if you have a lot of disposable income to afford the quality of life one would have for free in NYC.
Westchester , where i have lived for my life , is only worthwhile as a single parent or young parents if you have a lot of disposable income to afford the quality of life one would have for free in NYC.
Nothing of importance is free in NYC - you pay for these services through the NYC income tax. You'll also pay extra for after school enrichment and school amenities (fundraisers, misc expenses) that are provided for in Westchester's school systems.
However, with one kid and presumably an NYC career to manage, the OP might be better served living in Brooklyn, UES or LIC and sending the kid to private school. When there is a minor emergency, it could be tough going back and forth to Westchester from the city.
Ulrikaa:
I was born and raised there. If you can afford it, by all means move to Irvington. There are no big box stores in Irvington nor are there supermarkets and the congestion that goes with them, yet it is convenient to shop at them in neighboring towns. The commute by train to Grand Central Station is about 45 minutes. The schools are safe and have high academic standards. When the owners of some of the large estates died, Rutter's, Halsey's etc, developers came in and put up expensive homes pricing some of the long time residents out. Main Street and it's side streets are more middle class. I don't think you can go wrong buying a home anywhere in Irvington. Because of it's small town feel, location on the Hudson River, and lack of any real poverty. It is a very desirable place to live. Because of that the homes are more expensive than in neighboring towns. It was great growing up there, can't say what it's like now as there are indeed a more wealthier class of people living there than when I grew up. However having a large percentage of well to do people living there certainly brings up your property values.
As a hubby of a Brit, I would say you'll enjoy the diversity and freedom of the city more. Navigating the NYC schools is tricky, but rewarding if you are educated as you say and can work the system. It doesn't get tricky until they are around 10 or 11. They have some of the best schools in the country. We moved to westchester from NYC and have found ourselves in a community that is very white and uptight. I agree with the similar statements regarding the social aspects of westchester. We have a larger family and need the space and less stress about finding schools. However, if I were in your situation, I would stay close to the city. Check out Riverdale. It's close to Westchester and has great parks and an easy commute. Great elementary school. Ps 24.
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try queens
