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I have been at my job for 5 months. I do like my actual job but I can't stand most of my coworkers. I work with a group of gossipy, catty, petty women. I hate the office culture and I don't get involved in office politics. My client base and job keep me going.
Anyway the company party was changed from 2pm to 6pm one day to another date 5pm to 9pm. The new date change coincides with my fiances company party that I have already committed myself to. And its a party I actually want to attend and really enjoy. I can't attend my office party even for a little while because its a long ride to my fiance's party and it starts at 530 the same night.
I told the planner today I couldn't go and I told her why. I sense some attitude after that and from my manager but I kind of feel like they need to get over it. It isn't my problem they changed the date to a night I already have plans..
I think it depends on your company. I have worked for some companies where they don't care if you attend and some others where not attending means being overlooked when it comes to promotion time.
A lot of the time, a Christmas party is a chance to get to know some people higher up that might just help your career along just because they like you and they had a chance to get to know you a bit better.
I think it depends on your company. I have worked for some companies where they don't care if you attend and some others where not attending means being overlooked when it comes to promotion time.
A lot of the time, a Christmas party is a chance to get to know some people higher up that might just help your career along just because they like you and they had a chance to get to know you a bit better.
I agree, it really depends on the company.
If the OP is getting attitude she might want to think about this. It may sound silly but down the road if there are ever layoffs, sometimes something like not attending the party might be considered when they have to cut people.
If the fiance has been at his company for a few years perhaps he could give up his party to go to yours, or you could just go to your own individual parties.
It is a work related party, not a wedding or something you have to do together.
If the OP is getting attitude she might want to think about this. It may sound silly but down the road if there are ever layoffs, sometimes something like not attending the party might be considered when they have to cut people.
I agree completely. I have sat in meetings where we are deciding who to lay off. In some companies it is based on performance others were LIFO. Then there were some where they decided based on who fit best with the corporate culture. "This guy has not attended any company functions. We try to do something nice and he doesn't even appreciate it."
If you are already getting some attitude, it might be best to go.
Don't go if you already have plans. Seems silly to give up something you (& possibly your fiance) want to do, just to hang out with a bunch of catty coworkers with attitude just because it may or may not lead to a promotion.
I have been at my job for 5 months. I do like my actual job but I can't stand most of my coworkers. I work with a group of gossipy, catty, petty women. I hate the office culture and I don't get involved in office politics. My client base and job keep me going.
Anyway the company party was changed from 2pm to 6pm one day to another date 5pm to 9pm. The new date change coincides with my fiances company party that I have already committed myself to. And its a party I actually want to attend and really enjoy. I can't attend my office party even for a little while because its a long ride to my fiance's party and it starts at 530 the same night.
I told the planner today I couldn't go and I told her why. I sense some attitude after that and from my manager but I kind of feel like they need to get over it. It isn't my problem they changed the date to a night I already have plans..
With all due respect, if I had to guess, it is the attitude coming through the decision not to attend the party that has people acting like there is an issue with you attending. You have TONS (I put them in bold) of things you do not like about your job and are generally annoyed at how the party was planned. I am guessing that came through in the attitude you gave off while telling them you were not able to attend.
I'm not going to our x-mas party this year either. I've gone for the past 3 years at this job, but this year it is scheduled on a night & time that I have pre-existing plans that I am unwilling to change. If people think about my routine after hours schedule, they will know why I'm not going. I see no reason to formally mention the reason. And finally, I really don't think it's that big of a deal to not go (even though it can be fun & I enjoy many of my co-workers), because there are many who do not ever attend the x-mas party, or any after hours gathering.
If the OP is getting attitude she might want to think about this. It may sound silly but down the road if there are ever layoffs, sometimes something like not attending the party might be considered when they have to cut people.
Yes indeed, as in rethink her decision to work for this company. She hates office politics and if playing office politics is what it takes to succeed in this company then she is never going to be happy there.
I think if they changed the date/time after you already had another commitment, it's fine to honor your first commitment. If you've explained to your manager that you had these plans already RSVP's and committed, there's no reason to feel uncomfortable with your decision. That's life. If your department/co-worker's happen to have a little holiday lunch or "secret Santa" type thing in the interim, participate. Make an effort to be viewed as part of the team, for the sake of diplomacy.
Personally speaking, I think you're dodging what might be an unpleasant event. Generally speaking, office holiday parties are rife with all kinds of land mines ... inappropriate behavior, gossip, etc. If your co-workers are critical and "gossipy" now, the party may not be a ball of fun. Who knows, but in these difficult times when many people are tethered to a job they dislike, job dissatisfaction + alcohol (if it is being served) = a unpleasant experience.
Smile, be gracious, avoid office politics/gossip, remain neutral and go about your job. Wish everyone a happy holiday and be done with it.
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