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Dear Hiring Manager,
I am writing in response to the opening for an exciting actuarial internship opportunity this summer in Podunk, FL. I always want to be a part of Big Insurance Firm ‘s dynamic culture since your company has the leadership role in the industry.
I can offer you solid quantitative skills in mathematics, finance and programming which I obtains from my training at Big University. My time management skill and a great eye for detail have allowed me to complete well the work load of a teaching assistant and my demanding coursework at the same time. All of the above should make me an ideal candidate for this opening.
I have attached my resume for your review and would welcome the chance to speak with you in the future.
Best regards,
Max100.
Please help me to correct my cover letter. Thanks in advance.
Why are you just summarizing your resume? Your cover letter is to let them know why this particular job excites you and what specific qualities you have that is perfect for this specific job. It should be more of a "let me tell you a specific story", not a general re-hash.
Seriously, you cannot claim "an eye for detail" with dozens of grammar and spelling errors in your letter.
Classic.
Quote:
Originally Posted by spencgr
Why are you just summarizing your resume? Your cover letter is to let them know why this particular job excites you and what specific qualities you have that is perfect for this specific job. It should be more of a "let me tell you a specific story", not a general re-hash.
OP, start over and list some specific things you have done at your current job that are outstanding and prove why they want you on their team.
OP, start over and list some specific things you have done at your current job that are outstanding and prove why they want you on their team.
Quote:
Why are you just summarizing your resume? Your cover letter is to let them know why this particular job excites you and what specific qualities you have that is perfect for this specific job. It should be more of a "let me tell you a specific story", not a general re-hash.
Thanks for suggestion, but how long should the cover letter be ? Does a busy HR have enough time to read the whole thing ? I have heard that your cover letter should not be too long. Maybe I should add some bullets to show my quality.
Thanks for suggestion, but how long should the cover letter be ? Does a busy HR have enough time to read the whole thing ? I have heard that your cover letter should not be too long. Maybe I should add some bullets to show my quality.
Keep it short, use bullets to highlight your accomplishments, and get rid of the grammar and spelling errors.
Your cover letter is not great at all. Remember it should be a thesis 3-4 sentences selling why you're good for the position i.e. what you can offer over the other 10000 applicants. Triple check your grammar with friends and family and don't repeat anything that is already mentioned in your resume.
The point of a cover letter is to sell yourself to the company on why you'd be a good pick. I have no clue what solid quantitative skills in your various broad subject areas you have. I'm not even going to go into grammatical errors. I feel if you wanted feedback, you'd take the time to read what you wrote at least once after writing it.
Last edited by Suburban_Guy; 02-01-2015 at 08:43 PM..
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