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So how do you respond to colleagues who ask personal questions at work. I know many people don't mind sharing their personal lives but I'm not one of them.
In the past I've had coworkers ask
1. Are you dating/ married
2. How many children do you have
3. Where do you live (giving them the city wasn't good enough) they want cross streets
4. What does your spouse do for work
5. What type of work did your parent do
6 how much money are you making
7 how old are you
8 how much do you pay in rent/ mortgage
9 how much did you have in student loans
Often times when these and other questions come up especially during an initial conversation with a colleague I think "none of your business" but I have yet to figure out how to politely either not respond or vaguely respond. If you are like me how have you successfully avoided colleagues who can ask a million and one questions which have nothing to do with work. How can you tell them to back off without having them turn into a workplace enemy
Please let me know any tips or suggested answers.
Please don't respond with "just get to know them" or "don't be so secretive" or the like
So how do you respond to colleagues who ask personal questions at work. I know many people don't mind sharing their personal lives but I'm not one of them.
In the past I've had coworkers ask
1. Are you dating/ married
2. How many children do you have
3. Where do you live (giving them the city wasn't good enough) they want cross streets
4. What does your spouse do for work
5. What type of work did your parent do
6 how much money are you making
7 how old are you
8 how much do you pay in rent/ mortgage
9 how much did you have in student loans
Often times when these and other questions come up especially during an initial conversation with a colleague I think "none of your business" but I have yet to figure out how to politely either not respond or vaguely respond. If you are like me how have you successfully avoided colleagues who can ask a million and one questions which have nothing to do with work. How can you tell them to back off without having them turn into a workplace enemy
Please let me know any tips or suggested answers.
Please don't respond with "just get to know them" or "don't be so secretive" or the like
Thanks guys
Tell them you'd rather just keep the conversation professional. May make you look square but it's your right to focus on work, at work. I find it annoying too, personally. No one that still worked with me asked me how much I am making but I've discussed it with one person who left and another who is my close friend, in a different department.
Just give vague answers or avoid situation where you might be forced to divulge personal info. I like to CHOOSE who I share with, not be coerced or feel obligated to share private info. Rent question isn't a big deal but the only people who have asked are people looking to move or new to the area and wanted to get a ballpark figure.
Just be honest with them, and true to self. Regardless everyone is going to be a fan of who you are anyway so might as well be authentic.
So how do you respond to colleagues who ask personal questions at work. I know many people don't mind sharing their personal lives but I'm not one of them.
In the past I've had coworkers ask
1. Are you dating/ married
2. How many children do you have
3. Where do you live (giving them the city wasn't good enough) they want cross streets
4. What does your spouse do for work
5. What type of work did your parent do
6 how much money are you making
7 how old are you
8 how much do you pay in rent/ mortgage
9 how much did you have in student loans
Often times when these and other questions come up especially during an initial conversation with a colleague I think "none of your business" but I have yet to figure out how to politely either not respond or vaguely respond. If you are like me how have you successfully avoided colleagues who can ask a million and one questions which have nothing to do with work. How can you tell them to back off without having them turn into a workplace enemy
Please let me know any tips or suggested answers.
Please don't respond with "just get to know them" or "don't be so secretive" or the like
Thanks guys
LOL at # 9. I will tell people, it's just alot. Now #1, I have been asked or it just comes up naturally. I give very generic answers. I don not tell anyone where I live, and I will fudge the truth a bit to throw them off so they think I live elsewhere in town.
Ive been in this situation in all of my jobs. I'm pegged as being weird, sneaky and/or stuck up because of my quiet nature in the beginning of my jobs. So when asked personal questions i didn't have the heart to subtly tell them "none of your business" in fear it would push people farther to dislike me. So I ended up revealing information that I didn't want to. They would then use this information against me
So how do you respond to colleagues who ask personal questions at work. I know many people don't mind sharing their personal lives but I'm not one of them.
In the past I've had coworkers ask
1. Are you dating/ married
2. How many children do you have
3. Where do you live (giving them the city wasn't good enough) they want cross streets
4. What does your spouse do for work
5. What type of work did your parent do
6 how much money are you making
7 how old are you
8 how much do you pay in rent/ mortgage
9 how much did you have in student loans
Often times when these and other questions come up especially during an initial conversation with a colleague I think "none of your business" but I have yet to figure out how to politely either not respond or vaguely respond. If you are like me how have you successfully avoided colleagues who can ask a million and one questions which have nothing to do with work. How can you tell them to back off without having them turn into a workplace enemy
Please let me know any tips or suggested answers.
Please don't respond with "just get to know them" or "don't be so secretive" or the like
Thanks guys
1. Married.
2. 2
3. the truth
4. the truth
5. the truth
6. no one besides my mother (and loan officer) has ever asked that
7. the truth
8. the truth
9. the truth
If you don't want to answer a question, just say, "I don't really feel comfortable talking about it."
Most of the people who have asked me these questions are close friends/family. The first few are 'getting to know you' type questions.
The fact that it bothers you enough to make a post about how to respond to these questions means that you are probably socially awkward or a recluse.
I also don't understand how questions like "what type of work did your parents do" or "what do you pay on your mortgage" or "how much money do you make" come up without already being in the midst of a conversation, you being generally close to the person asking, or you giving people enough information about yourself to warrant them asking you.
But regardless, there is really no way to get people to back off or stop asking these questions without you coming across as a total creep and telling them 'none of your business' or whatever. If this type of stuff bothers you that much then do not engage in any type of conversation about yourself in the first place that would lead to these questions.
I would politely respond with "Why are you asking?" No matter how they respond, I then answer, "I see", and let it be, and/or change the subject. If that doesn't shut them down, and their next question is invariably "You didn't answer my question", I respond, "I didn't, did I". Then politely smile and change the subject. That usually does it.
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