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I currently have two jobs. My boss at my second job is very domineering, glib, and is basically your garden variety jerk. He has zero compassion and gleefully manipulates others for his own gain. He is particularly insulting and degrading towards women.
In short, he sees the world as consisting of winners and losers. The winners are the ones who ruthlessly take what they want and act better than everyone else. Everyone else is a loser. There is no middle ground.
He told me today in so many words that he wants me to be just like him otherwise I will not succeed. He thinks because I approach people with empathy instead of calculating ruthlessness that I am ineffective. Mind you, I am NOT ineffective at my job and I've built many positive relationships because of my interpersonal style. People actually like me and enjoy working with me. He just thinks he's god. I do NOT aim to be like him. Ever.
I feel that if I do not change into who he wants me to be that he will badmouth me as incompetent to upper management, to where I will not be able to defend myself because they don't actually work with me. They rely on him and his assessment. I am afraid that he is painting me in a negative light simply because I don't act like a psychopath. I don't know what to do.
Find another job. Are there established metrics to measure your job performance, or is it a subjective review?
There are very vague metrics at best. It's mostly subjective and there is no one else at my level that I can compare myself to for reference. I'm basically at his mercy.
From what you've wrote, it sounds like they like you, don't mind you too bad and you're being given an honest chance.
I guess you are working in a casino, cafe or restaurant from the general tune of what you have written. The industry and atmosphere must be very tough and heavy.
It's easy to say to you, that you should toughen up and get with the program. That would be easy, because I'm not you and can't tell how it feels.
At the same time, it sounds like you are facing a steep learning curve and that you are passive in your approach to customers and clients. You may want to take their advice more seriously and change your tune. Put on a show, flatter, gently insult, tease your patrons. That's how my office management deal with.. themselves, I think.
So you have to be a scumbag cutthroat "business man" to advance? Take off. I don't know how people can even look themselves in the mirror being like this.
Ive seen a lot of people come and go with this mindset. Karma comes back and bites ALL of them in some way. Sooner or later. Plus... Why be that way?? Theres no reason to be that way to others.
It's not an option yet. I haven't been there for long enough.
You're making excuses.
You have two jobs, you just list your other job and since you plan on keeping that one, find a different second job. He isn't going anywhere and he isn't going to change, so that means you have to leave.
Most if not all part time gigs are **** n many dont complain cuz its the way things are
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