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We often share experiences with each other. There is a guy that I started working with earlier this year. He always looks for inconsistencies in what I say. I'm sure he does it with other people as well. The thing is this. There never is enough time for us to share EVERYTHING about our experiences. So, if you think hard enough, you can always find inconsistencies in everything even if there are no inconsistencies if you know everything about them.
For example, earlier today, I told him last year we ran into situation X and we had to deal with it with Y. He said wait a minute wait a minute I just spotted an inconsistency. You were working for organization Z which doesn't allow Y. I had to tell him that I worked on 2 projects last year, not just 1. In fact, it is often the case that an engineer works on more than 1 project in the same year. Very normal.
That was just one example. Even something as simple as "my beagle blah blah blah", he'd jump in and say "but I thought you had a lap". Well, can't a person have more than one dog?
It does get irritating at times, because after all the laughs and giggles, it does sound like he's accusing you of lying.
Ignore him. He will get the point and then leave you alone.
Actually, lately I almost never complain about work. I actually love my job and career.
MLS is I'm guessing someone that hates his job. It's his way of trying to jab me.
Go ahead and do a search of my posting history in this section if you don't believe me.
I think you just ran into someone else looking for inconsistencies in your story! (Yay CD!)
This behavior you describe is rude, OP. But is there a chance he is on the spectrum? My friend's daughter is and she has a hard time making friends because she is always pointing out inaccuracies in what people say. In English slangy speech there is a lot of imprecision of language which she always calls attention to. She also has trouble reading social cues. And she just started college for engineering, an occupation which requires a high degree of precision.
I've noticed two kinds of people - those who like to agree with people and are always saying "Yes....blah blah" even though they actually disagree with you on some level but they look for ways to be agreeable.
Versus those who like to disagree with people and always find something to disagree with even though you're actually in agreement them. It's like part of their image to be oppositional or at least overly picky, precise and pedantic for no good reason. Guess which ones do better in life?
I think you just ran into someone else looking for inconsistencies in your story! (Yay CD!)
This behavior you describe is rude, OP. But is there a chance he is on the spectrum? My friend's daughter is and she has a hard time making friends because she is always pointing out inaccuracies in what people say. In English slangy speech there is a lot of imprecision of language which she always calls attention to. She also has trouble reading social cues. And she just started college for engineering, an occupation which requires a high degree of precision.
Since English is my 2nd language, is there a word to describe this type of behavior?
Guy A says "it's 7:30". Guy B says "no, it's not. It's 7:29."
Guy A says "There are a dozen people here." Guy B says "I count only 11."
You know what I'm talking about? I've encountered such people from time to time. Always picking apart what you say. In normal everyday language, we rely on proper English AS WELL AS the other person's common sense to properly communicate. In other words, if we say something that can be interpreted in 2 ways, one way that makes sense and the other that makes no sense, we as social creatures rely on the other person to interpret what we say to make sense.
I sure as hell don't want to have to be 100% precise 100% of the time. That's very mentally draining.
We often share experiences with each other. There is a guy that I started working with earlier this year. He always looks for inconsistencies in what I say. I'm sure he does it with other people as well. The thing is this. There never is enough time for us to share EVERYTHING about our experiences. So, if you think hard enough, you can always find inconsistencies in everything even if there are no inconsistencies if you know everything about them.
For example, earlier today, I told him last year we ran into situation X and we had to deal with it with Y. He said wait a minute wait a minute I just spotted an inconsistency. You were working for organization Z which doesn't allow Y. I had to tell him that I worked on 2 projects last year, not just 1. In fact, it is often the case that an engineer works on more than 1 project in the same year. Very normal.
That was just one example. Even something as simple as "my beagle blah blah blah", he'd jump in and say "but I thought you had a lap". Well, can't a person have more than one dog?
It does get irritating at times, because after all the laughs and giggles, it does sound like he's accusing you of lying.
Such people see themselves as flawed and this is their means of deflecting attention from themselves.
It is an insecure person's way of trying to diminish you and make themselves look good. There are a number of approaches to dealing with this, none of which are effective in every situation.
If the person is commonly known as being pedantic, ignoring them works pretty well. Everybody in the workplace knows that they are annoying, they will ignore the person's pointless pickiness and focus on what you have to say.
You can take the sarcastic route. "Oh, I didn't think that the difference between 11:59 and 12:00 was terribly significant. If you like, we can all take a one minute break and delay the meeting so that you can synchronize everybody's watches."
You can be more precise than them, to a ludicrous point, so that everybody knows you are mocking them. "You're right. There are only 11 people in the room. To be even more precise, 6 women and 5 men, 5 brunettes, 2 blondes, 3 redheads and Steve, who prefers to be known as a bald-American. Now that we have gotten the needless pickiness out of the way, let's do something productive"
Obviously the sarcastic route can backfire, and I wouldn't use it on a person with no sense of humor.
There is the direct approach. In private, tell them that they may not be aware of it, but they are being annoying. Rather than turn everything into a competition, you would prefer to work cooperatively. This is likely to require a concession or two on your part. It is best to go to a meeting or two and take great measures to compliment and support them. On,y after a couple of public supportive displays should you confront them.
There are other tactics. Your mileage may vary with any of course.
If there is inconsistency then I need to be clear or given the opportunity to convey it. I consider it a compliment if the person actually "listened" to pick up on a tidbit of information.
My boss is the epitome of inconsistent. So when I approach a matter I get four different answers! None of which were clear.
I believe in the saying...."the devil is in the details". So if someone is being evasive or elusive..I tend to follow up with "can you clarify that since it was a bit murky?". This allows them the chance to say...Ohh yeah I meant I have two dogs,one named jack and one named Jill. Jill is the one that I was speaking about.
people like that are douche bags, really. I had mr. perfect as a co worker as well. After a few episodes, I asked him if he is studying to be a teacher, because he feels a need to correct all the time. I also had to tell him, "I aint talking to you anyways, Mind your business."
Since English is my 2nd language, is there a word to describe this type of behavior?
Guy A says "it's 7:30". Guy B says "no, it's not. It's 7:29."
Guy A says "There are a dozen people here." Guy B says "I count only 11."
You know what I'm talking about? I've encountered such people from time to time. Always picking apart what you say. In normal everyday language, we rely on proper English AS WELL AS the other person's common sense to properly communicate. In other words, if we say something that can be interpreted in 2 ways, one way that makes sense and the other that makes no sense, we as social creatures rely on the other person to interpret what we say to make sense.
I sure as hell don't want to have to be 100% precise 100% of the time. That's very mentally draining.
This sounds like he could be on the autism spectrum-- here are some traits of that kind of behavior.
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