Might be moving to Birmingham..should I be concerned?? (Mobile: live in, friendly)

[pennquaker09]

Gotta side with bluedevilmom on this one. And I have to say she's right about the "bless your heart" type comments.

[cpg35223]

Originally Posted by pennquaker09

Gotta side with bluedevilmom on this one. And I have to say she's right about the "bless your heart" type comments.

And I'm from out-of-town, too. Aside from the bi-racial couple bit, we have a lot of the same aspects about us.

Guess what? We never had a problem fitting in here. We have plenty of friends with whom we differ religiously, politically, etc. etc. It certainly doesn't keep us from being invited to lots of parties and staying socially active.

Bluedevilmom makes it sound as if you will be shunned if you don't conform 100% to some kind of social code. That's just total, absolute baloney.

[pennquaker09]

Originally Posted by cpg35223

And I'm from out-of-town, too. Aside from the bi-racial couple bit, we have a lot of the same aspects about us.

Guess what? We never had a problem fitting in here. We have plenty of friends with whom we differ religiously, politically, etc. etc. It certainly doesn't keep us from being invited to lots of parties and staying socially active.

Bluedevilmom makes it sound as if you will be shunned if you don't conform 100% to some kind of social code. That's just total, absolute baloney.

I think, for me, coming from Mountain Brook and a "society" type family, I find it's much harder for people that do not conform to fit in.

[cpg35223]

Originally Posted by pennquaker09

I think, for me, coming from Mountain Brook and a "society" type family, I find it's much harder for people that do not conform to fit in.

Hey, we live in Mountain Brook. Not a problem for us.

Having moved around a lot during our married life, however, we've discovered some basic principles.

If you're good with people, you'll have friends no matter where you live. At the same time, making friends in a new place is a bit of work at first. You have to step outside your comfort zone, ask people to lunch, engage them in conversations, etc.

Living in Mountain Brook, I suppose there are some people who don't put us on their party invitations because we don't fit in. But a heck of a lot more don't seem to give a rip.

[Farmhouse1]

Birmigham native...you hit the nail on the head..the most open minded parts are forest park/advent/altamont/indian springs--homewood-maybe parts are progressive

[carpe777]

I will address #4 and the rest kind of falls in line. We moved to Birmingham as a bi racial, northern, Catholic, liberal family, who happened to suppport the current President during the last election. Our life was VERY difficult. On the surface everyone is kind and sweet, "bless her heart , and isn that nice," but Birmingham is an EXTREMELY conservative town. I did find that the people who were the most forward thinking tended to send their children to private schools. You will find the most diversity there as well. Look at Advent Day for example.

Redmont and Forest Park are areas that are more diverse with more folks from other parts of the country. Don't get me wrong, I know many, many people will disagree with me and everyone is entitled to their opinion, but this is mine. Also, there are many good things to be had in Birmingham, great weather, good hospitals, great restaurants and nice museums. If you look for the upside, you will find it. If you look for the downside, you will find it too. But, living location and schooling will make all the difference and I strongly suggest a Forest Park/Advent type situation for the best outcome for your. On the surface everyone is kind and sweet, "bless her heart , and isn that nice," but Birmingham is an EXTREMELY conservative town. I did find that the people who were the most forward thinking tended to send their children to private schools. You will find the most diversity there as well. Look at Advent Day for example.
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"On the surface everyone is kind and sweet, "bless her heart , and isnt that nice," but Birmingham is an EXTREMELY conservative town. I did find that the people who were the most forward thinking tended to send their children to private schools." Emphases added.

The quote above lets me know that you let your pre-conceived notions of what you thought of Birmingham before you lived bias your thinking while you lived in Birmingham and never allowed you to objectively evaluate the city and its people.

"But" .... what is "but" in opposition to ? Are you trying to say ( you are, even if you think not) that conservative people are not sincere ? Guess what, there are people of all strains and flavors who are sincere, and there are people of the same strains and flavors who are insincere.

"EXTREMELY" .... It is true, but doesn'tnecessarily make it bad, plus, you , my dear, are in the minority.... the country as a whole is center-right. I thought you appreciated diversity.

"most forward thinking" .... meaning = people who think different than myself are backward thinking. Again, thought you appreciated diversity. And, by the way, you WILL NOT find the most diversity in private schools in the Birmingham area; that will be found in the public schools.

If you are going to comment on a place, give an objective view, so that folks can make up their own mind.

I, for one, am very conservative, and I greatly appreciate my diverse and liberal friends in Birmingham and elsewhere because I realize that not all my ideas are correct. I also realize that I can even learn from those who do not hold my viewpoint. But I do not learn from those who do not want to have anything to do with me.

Carpe

[FLandFF]

Originally Posted by cpg35223

And I'm from out-of-town, too. Aside from the bi-racial couple bit, we have a lot of the same aspects about us.

Guess what? We never had a problem fitting in here. We have plenty of friends with whom we differ religiously, politically, etc. etc. It certainly doesn't keep us from being invited to lots of parties and staying socially active.

Bluedevilmom makes it sound as if you will be shunned if you don't conform 100% to some kind of social code. That's just total, absolute baloney.

Ooookay, here's the thing. If you are not a minority, if you are not biracial, if you have never been in an interracial relationship in the Birmingham area then you really can't speak on the subject. For some of you be so dismissive of the opinions of those who have actually been a POC/in an interracial relationship in Birmingham is ignorant and reeks of white privilege and is exactly why people like myself and bluedevilmom feel the way that we do.

OP, as bluedevilmom said, moving to Birmingham truly is like moving to another country. I'm from Huntsville, but I've lived here for about 10 years and it really isn't like other places in AL. This city is so far behind a lot of other areas of the US and the races really don't interact (as is evidenced anytime a non-white person asks how they'll be received here. 10 people telling you how they have a black person who lives just down the road from them--and they even let them use their bathroom!). Most people won't be outright rude to you, but it will be obvious that you are an outsider, especially if you're not an Alabama/Auburn fan, Republican, or religious.

As far as location, I would suggest the usual: Homewood, Vestavia, Hoover. Some other areas may seem more progressive, but the schools are crap. Good luck!!!

[cpg35223]

Originally Posted by FLandFF

Ooookay, here's the thing. If you are not a minority, if you are not biracial, if you have never been in an interracial relationship in the Birmingham area then you really can't speak on the subject. For some of you be so dismissive of the opinions of those who have actually been a POC/in an interracial relationship in Birmingham is ignorant and reeks of white privilege and is exactly why people like myself and bluedevilmom feel the way that we do.

OP, as bluedevilmom said, moving to Birmingham truly is like moving to another country. I'm from Huntsville, but I've lived here for about 10 years and it really isn't like other places in AL. This city is so far behind a lot of other areas of the US and the races really don't interact (as is evidenced anytime a non-white person asks how they'll be received here. 10 people telling you how they have a black person who lives just down the road from them--and they even let them use their bathroom!). Most people won't be outright rude to you, but it will be obvious that you are an outsider, especially if you're not an Alabama/Auburn fan, Republican, or religious.

As far as location, I would suggest the usual: Homewood, Vestavia, Hoover. Some other areas may seem more progressive, but the schools are crap. Good luck!!!

Well, first off, if missing the point were an Olympic event, you'd be a gold medalist. My post did not address the bi-racial issue at all because I simply could not speak to it--so I was trying to address the other aspects of the OP's post. But you felt a need to write some kind of supercilious bilge in order to occupy the high moral ground. If this is how you interact with others, then small wonder your neighbors don't like you. And it doesn't have anything to do with ethnicity, political persuasion, or the football team you support.

[FLandFF]

Oh, I got the point. The OP asked how her family would be received and you decided that her experience could be just like yours. Only that's not how it works. You can't replace/compare race with religion or political affiliations; it's simply not the same thing. And that is what you don't get.

And my neighbors love me, but nice try!

[cpg35223]

Originally Posted by FLandFF

Oh, I got the point. The OP asked how her family would be received and you decided that her experience could be just like yours. Only that's not how it works. You can't replace/compare race with religion or political affiliations; it's simply not the same thing. And that is what you don't get.

And my neighbors love me, but nice try!

No, you didn't. The poster to whom I was responding was ticking off the entire laundry list of things that one has to do to be accepted in this city. In my response to the post I nicely refuted most of those simply because we don't fit into any of these categories, yet manage to have a lot of friends. And then you try to make it all about race, neatly ignoring all her other comments, and add some pious, self-important bluster to top things off.

What's more, if you are biracial and your Vestavia neighbors love you, then please explain to me how you're not accepted here. It's either one or the other. Seems like you're talking out of both sides of your mouth at the same time.