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Mine has just asked me for a $6K retainer, but said he was unsure of how much more it was going to take.
There's always the possibility that once my husband sees that I'm serious enough to hire an attorney, he'll agree to make this easy. I told him that I'd rather give him the money to start his life than to pay a lawyer. But God only knows what goes on his his brain. I can only pray for the best.
Thank you all so much. I really appreciate the feedback. My husband doesn't have anything worth anything at all because he hasn't worked much throughout our 12 years. I'm mostly trying to make him leave which he won't because he has no place to go, no money and no friends.
His refusal to leave is the biggest battle because NC law states that since his name is on the deed to the house, he has the right to reside there unless he hits me... and he hasn't done that for a couple of years.
I could always call the police if he refuses to leave, but that will be a gamble and total judgement call on their part. It also doesn't help that he was the head of the crime watch and knows all of them.
You definitely need someone who can help you navigate the system. I hope you have a good attorney who will protect you. You are not the first person to have a problem over that ancient NC law. Believe me. You can't even change the locks until he is out and has signed papers. I am sending good thoughts. Stay strong. You may be surprised how many people are not fooled by the nice guy routine . . . just focus on yourself and your safety. All things pass - in time.
Yes, a lot of money involved so it was worth it for him.
I agree with Ani-stay strong and get yourself a pitbull attorney. It should be a piece of cake then. I know $6k sounds like a lot but how much is your sanity worth??
Thank you all so much. I really appreciate the feedback. My husband doesn't have anything worth anything at all because he hasn't worked much throughout our 12 years. I'm mostly trying to make him leave which he won't because he has no place to go, no money and no friends.
His refusal to leave is the biggest battle because NC law states that since his name is on the deed to the house, he has the right to reside there unless he hits me... and he hasn't done that for a couple of years.
I could always call the police if he refuses to leave, but that will be a gamble and total judgement call on their part. It also doesn't help that he was the head of the crime watch and knows all of them.
That att'y is going to save YOUR money from the shirker. You don't want him getting any more of it than he has to. And hope you don't have to pay him alimony.
I had the same situation in another state - my husband didn't want the divorce and didn't see why he had to move out. I shopped for an apt for him, got him sheets, towels, kitchen stuff, etc. before I could get him out of the house, which was in both our names. In that state, my lawyer told me the 1st one to leave the house is considered to have "abandonned" the marriage. It took some emotional wrangling before he left.
$300 an hour to navigate a system created by attorneys- aint that something?!?! Truly, it makes me sick that the common man (woman) can't even begin to navigate the system without the help of a corporate shark. I hope everything plays in your favor, and your husband makes the right choice. Any guy who resorts to physical violence against his spouse ain't all there, and should be reserving a space under the 77-85 overpass (IMHO). God speed!
Ani - how did you know - I think you have ESP or something. Yes, Bipolar.
Just let me say . . . even tho you may feel that you are on a path by yourself, many of us have walked that path before you. Many of us have bipolar family members . . . and/or Exes. You are not alone, even if it may feel that way at times. I hope it gives you a bit of comfort to know there are those of us who have walked where you are walking now . . . and managed to come out on the other side . . . intact and indeed, happy.
Ani ---- I will keep your words to help me hold back the tears in hopes of a brighter future.
V.
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