[JayCT]

Originally Posted by Konig1985

It amazed me that American parents are willing to expose their kids to all kinds of service providers (Nannies, Au pairs, Day Care) but frankly I won't trust any of them. What happened to your parents?

You know that this is not just an American thing. The British have been using nannies for centuries and quite frankly I do not see issues with them. That said we went the daycare route because we did not trust homecare. We felt that there were multiple people responsible for the watching children. We felt this was better than the kids being plopped in front of a TV all day. Jay

[renovating]

Originally Posted by Konig1985

What is the difference between nanny and au pair? They sound the same to me. It helps if anyone can clarify this thanks.

An au pair is more like an exchange student arrangement...they are usually from another country and they are live in help that in exchange for the room and board a smaller salary is paid to them for work.

A nanny can be live in or out.

[J&A'sMOM]

I'd look in Westport if I were you. 1) Your husband works there and it's almost unheard of living in a town where you work. That would be fabulous. 2) You could find a property that you can add on to later down the road and the schools are great. There is are enough people from different cultures to make it interesting. I'd suggest you try and find a house in a friendly neighborhood setting. If you have children down the road it will make your life easier.
Good Luck

[mla19]

I'm the OP. Clearly I forgot about this post as it's been forever. Sorry. Years later and we're still renting in White Plains. Thanks for the suggestions. Towns like Wesport and Wilton *could* be great for us but they're too far from NYC for me. I work very long hours (10-12 hour work days reguarly with several 16 hour days) and don't want to have a 60 minute twice daily train ride on top of that, especially once I have kids. Plus we suspect my parents, who are on LI will be more hands-on once we have kids than my in-laws in CT. Also, while I would never suggest that we have money problems at our salary level, to think that $425k/year is smooth-sailing for towns like Rye or Greenwich is not true. We'd be very under budget there. And it is extremely important to us that we not become house-poor, unable to provide for our kids and enjoy ourselves b/c our house costs so damn much. Remember too that I, as the woman, bring in more than 1/2 of that annual salary and I frankly am not sure that I can continue working the way that I do now forever. I don't need to have kids yet to know that once I do, my priorities and lifestyle will change dramatically.

[MomOfToo]

I haven't read through this thread but maybe you can buy a lot and put a modular up? It might actually be cheaper. Maybe you can look in pound ridge or armonk or even katonah?

[JayCT]

Originally Posted by mla19

I'm the OP. Clearly I forgot about this post as it's been forever. Sorry. Years later and we're still renting in White Plains. Thanks for the suggestions. Towns like Wesport and Wilton *could* be great for us but they're too far from NYC for me. I work very long hours (10-12 hour work days reguarly with several 16 hour days) and don't want to have a 60 minute twice daily train ride on top of that, especially once I have kids. Plus we suspect my parents, who are on LI will be more hands-on once we have kids than my in-laws in CT. Also, while I would never suggest that we have money problems at our salary level, to think that $425k/year is smooth-sailing for towns like Rye or Greenwich is not true. We'd be very under budget there. And it is extremely important to us that we not become house-poor, unable to provide for our kids and enjoy ourselves b/c our house costs so damn much. Remember too that I, as the woman, bring in more than 1/2 of that annual salary and I frankly am not sure that I can continue working the way that I do now forever. I don't need to have kids yet to know that once I do, my priorities and lifestyle will change dramatically.

If you can't live well on $425k per year, even in Greenwich, then something is seriously wrong with your lifestyle. You really need to look at what you are blowing your money on. I would suggest that you modify your lifestyle and sock away as much money as you can. Once you have a reasonable amount saved toward a home, then buy and start your family. The home should be priced so you could afford it on one salary. Buy a home closer to your family so they can help with future kids. You could also change jobs to have more reasonable hours. JMHO. Good luck, Jay

[mla19]

Originally Posted by JayCT

If you can't live well on $425k per year, even in Greenwich, then something is seriously wrong with your lifestyle. You really need to look at what you are blowing your money on. I would suggest that you modify your lifestyle and sock away as much money as you can. Once you have a reasonable amount saved toward a home, then buy and start your family. The home should be priced so you could afford it on one salary. Buy a home closer to your family so they can help with future kids. You could also change jobs to have more reasonable hours. JMHO. Good luck, Jay

Are you familiar with Greenwich real estate? We've looked at tons of houses in Old Greenwich and Riverside. To get a house that's around 2,000 square feet with 3 beds and 2 baths and NOT within ear-shot of I-95, you need to spend about $1.1-1.2m on your house. Yes, we can probably afford that but do you think that after we pay our monthly mortgage, taxes, pay for 2 cars, and a nanny we're going to have lots left? I don't think so. We don't actually take home $425k per year - that's our gross salaries. The govt takes a lot out. Again, I'm not saying we have money problems, and in most US towns we'd be golden, but not in Greenwich.

Also, you say "something is seriously wrong with [my] lifestyle" and I should "modify [my] lifestyle and sock away as much money as [i] can". The point of my post was that we do not want to blow our entire salaries on a house. We want to be able to continually save and be able to enjoy our lives. Currently, I fund my 401k to the max, invest monthly with an investment adviser and try to additionally sock away about $1-2k per month toward our savings on top of that. I'm very proud of how much I save each month. But I know that once we have a kids and a 2nd car and a mortgage, I won't have as much left over for savings or for spending.

Edited to add that I admit I do like nice things and like to treat myself to a good meal or a pretty outfit and yes I would like to continue doing that with a house and kids. But heck I work hard for my money and if I wasn't allowing myself to experience the "good life" within reason (i.e. while also responsibly savings), I think I'd jump out the window!

[Konig1985]

Originally Posted by mla19

Are you familiar with Greenwich real estate? We've looked at tons of houses in Old Greenwich and Riverside. To get a house that's around 2,000 square feet with 3 beds and 2 baths and NOT within ear-shot of I-95, you need to spend about $1.1-1.2m on your house. Yes, we can probably afford that but do you think that after we pay our monthly mortgage, taxes, pay for 2 cars, and a nanny we're going to have lots left? I don't think so. We don't actually take home $425k per year - that's our gross salaries. The govt takes a lot out. Again, I'm not saying we have money problems, and in most US towns we'd be golden, but not in Greenwich.

Also, you say "something is seriously wrong with [my] lifestyle" and I should "modify [my] lifestyle and sock away as much money as [i] can". The point of my post was that we do not want to blow our entire salaries on a house. We want to be able to continually save and be able to enjoy our lives. Currently, I fund my 401k to the max, invest monthly with an investment adviser and try to additionally sock away about $1-2k per month toward our savings on top of that. I'm very proud of how much I save each month. But I know that once we have a kids and a 2nd car and a mortgage, I won't have as much left over for savings or for spending.

Edited to add that I admit I do like nice things and like to treat myself to a good meal or a pretty outfit and yes I would like to continue doing that with a house and kids. But heck I work hard for my money and if I wasn't allowing myself to experience the "good life" within reason (i.e. while also responsibly savings), I think I'd jump out the window!

If Im in your situation, I'll just rent in WCT and start looking at a real house in FFC until the first kid goes to elementary school. It is very difficult to buy a house until your requirements and plans are clear as crystal. Who knows if you'll get promoted in your office in the future or not?

[kidyankee764]

Originally Posted by JayCT

If you can't live well on $425k per year, even in Greenwich, then something is seriously wrong with your lifestyle.

Eh, not so much Jay. If someone wants a home that's 3500 square feet in Greenwich, they best have an income higher than that. It's doable to buy a million dollar home and live comfortably in Greenwich on that amount, but think of what a million bucks buys in Greenwich: a smaller home on a fraction of an acre of land.

[jax12479]

$425k/year is a huge gross salary, you can live in Greenwich on far less than that. You can buy a 4-5 bedroom house on a couple of acres there for less than 2 million, which is within your means (unless you're just extremely conservative/need to resolve outstanding debt)? In any case, I grew up there and I don't know anyone who made that much, so I think you're underestimating your buying power.