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Old 08-04-2009, 12:01 PM
 
Location: TX
1,096 posts, read 1,835,518 times
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"I've noticed that some people who live in the northern areas will ask you 'what do you do' almost immediately whereas in my part of town that's considered rude."

I'm pretty much a hermit on my own time and deal with lot's of people at work (maybe it's because I deal with lot's of people at work that I'm somewhat reclusive at home? I dunno) -- so I don't really meet tons of new people all the time -- my wife and kids are the outgoing ones. People I meet at work know what I do already, so I haven't noticed this so much. However, when I do meet new people outside of work conversation at some point always turns to occupation - I never really got the feeling that this was a way of sizing someone up - more just small talk and taking an interest in the other person. Is it a Texas or Southern thing that it's impolite to ask about someone's occupation?
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Old 08-04-2009, 12:44 PM
 
Location: Coppell
171 posts, read 545,999 times
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I grew up with parents that drove a car into the ground rather than buy new all the time. They did it so they could travel 6-8 weeks overseas every summer. I'm an only child and only because of that did I get a retainer (for my teeth) when I could've gotten by without one...LOL Other than that I had to work to get what I wanted. I'm glad I have some of those values...although I'll admit it took me til I was in my 30's to really get it

Although I don't pay cash for everything up front, my credit cards are paid off IN FULL every month. Sometimes I wish I could be like "those people" that run up their credit cards for fun but alas, my practical side kicks in every time *sigh*
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Old 08-04-2009, 01:10 PM
 
Location: Dallas, TX
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There's nothing "fun" about having credit card debt.
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Old 08-04-2009, 01:11 PM
 
Location: Texas
587 posts, read 1,625,556 times
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I'm guessing there are people that try to "keep up with the Joneses" in every city or town (low self-esteem) - but there are many, many others who don't think that way at all - as evidenced by the response to this question. If you are looking for it here, you'll find it. If you're looking for down-to-earth folks, you'll find them here too.
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Old 08-04-2009, 01:21 PM
 
Location: The Big D
14,862 posts, read 42,882,290 times
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Quote:
Originally Posted by renlouis View Post
I'm guessing there are people that try to "keep up with the Joneses" in every city or town (low self-esteem) - but there are many, many others who don't think that way at all - as evidenced by the response to this question. If you are looking for it here, you'll find it. If you're looking for down-to-earth folks, you'll find them here too.


If one wants to feel like they are "in a contest" to who has what I can point you to a few people I know. There have been a few times they have said something and I'm like, "I didn't know there WAS a contest" . I really only know 3 families like this and 2 of them are related, urgh (and I'm related to THEM - I swear I'm adopted). Worst part, two of the 3 are in TERRIBLE financial shape, have had to file bankruptcy in the last 2 years and still charging, blowing and going like there is no tomorrow and still try to do things to "impress". Who the heck they are trying to impress I have no clue as everyone around them always just roles their eyes and goes on. Even the kids around them have picked up on it and one friends kid said, "why is it after we go buy something HE goes and buys the same thing and tries to get something even bigger". LOL!!! You just have to just learn to smile, shake your head and say, "that's nice" and then turn around and go on whenever you meet people that want to try to impress others.

On the other hand I know people that are worth millions and are penny pinchers. They might do things that some see as "keeping up with the Jones" if one does not know them or that they are doing it to impress but they are honestly doing these things because THEY want to. Then they might turn around and fuss about spending $40 on something that seems frivilious and outragous and not do it. Funny thing is these families are the ones that are the hardest on their kids financially and making them financially responsible and work for things. The ones mentioned in the first paragraph try to lavish things on their kids and poo-poo them. You will find more people like this that have some money and are more aware of what they are spending around here than you will the ones that are out to impress or outdo others like there is some contest going on.
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Old 08-04-2009, 02:50 PM
 
Location: Lake Highlands (Dallas)
2,394 posts, read 8,597,112 times
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Lakewooder View Post
I've noticed that some people who live in the northern areas will ask you 'what do you do' almost immediately whereas in my part of town that's considered rude.
I don't consider it rude at all. Most people work, so it's a very common topic to discuss. People are looking for things in common to talk about - to connect. Where you work, if/where you go to chuch, sports preferences and political views are all very common ways to strike up conversations with people.

I know that I'm tickled pink when someone knows what the hell a network engineer is. LOL!!! I usually get a blank stare and a head turned a little to the side... then I follow up with the statement, "I make it so computers can talk to each other, anywhere in the world" or "I program the equipment that runs the Internet". People are usually interested in it, but wow - it's hard to discuss anything without spewing acronyms and protocols... haha. My wife cracks up on the rare scenario that someone is in the field and we start gonig off: ...BGP...MPLS...ISIS...IPv6...OSPF...ASN...10gig.. .OC192... She usually rolls her eyes and finds someone else to talk to. Hehe. Yup, I'm a geek.

Brian
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Old 08-04-2009, 03:11 PM
 
16,087 posts, read 41,166,264 times
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LOL Brian, I probably wouldn't understand enough to even talk to you about your job. I'm not saying you can't ask what someone does for a living - it's just that it's better to work it in rather than it be the very first question you are asked. People here are more apt to ask which street or house you live in (long-timers will actually know the house and its history), where you went to school, who your family and friend are, etc. Sometimes they even have a subject going such as travel, books, restaurants, films or whatever and when a new person is introduced they just work them into the subject. We can even discuss politics in a civil manner around here as we know there are varying points of view.

Yeah mom I have some relatives who used to live in East Texas that are voracious materalistic consumers. They moved to Frisco and have done the whole Frisco thing.
So yes, I do know what I am talking about when it comes to some people up there...

Incidentally I had a "WEST" Plano girl after me at a trendy Dallas bar on Saturday - She asked "What do you do?" in a very pointed manner before I could even introduce myself. When she did that I just replied "ANYTHING I WANT".
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Old 08-04-2009, 03:35 PM
 
Location: Texas
587 posts, read 1,625,556 times
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My favorite response to "what do you do?" is........."I don't!". Usually gets a good laugh (or a blank stare!)
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Old 08-04-2009, 04:49 PM
 
Location: The Big D
14,862 posts, read 42,882,290 times
Reputation: 5787
Quote:
Originally Posted by Lakewooder View Post
Yeah mom I have some relatives who used to live in East Texas that are voracious materalistic consumers. They moved to Frisco and have done the whole Frisco thing.
So yes, I do know what I am talking about when it comes to some people up there...

Incidentally I had a "WEST" Plano girl after me at a trendy Dallas bar on Saturday - She asked "What do you do?" in a very pointed manner before I could even introduce myself. When she did that I just replied "ANYTHING I WANT".
LOL!!! My relatives are now moving to another state. The same state they fled from a few years ago after only 1 1/2 years to come back to Texas. LOL!!!! They just "can't wait to get back". HAHAHAHA!!!!! We have now taken bets and the average time it will take them to come back for the FOURTH TIME is 2 - 2 1/2 years (only because of the economy and their need to "prove" it is such a great place to live ). And they wonder why they never can get ahead


Okay, that is usually the answer when anyone asks me what my husband does. Whenever I say, "anything he wants" I get the blankest stares. I then offer up, "he is in the X business" and THAT confuses them even more as the industry is even geekier than Brians as it can be sooooo dang technical. I like to confuse them more by even going into the different types of business and industries we deal in . But the whole "anything he wants" is great. Then they ask what he does on THAT end and if they are the type that likes to "prove" anything or start to act like they are stuck up or "better than thou" then I really have fun . I answer with things like: He collects things. That of course gets them going and I throw out that he collects CARS. Like in LOTS of them and likes to race as well and enjoys attending car shows and auctions all over the country (of course in a tone that makes it sound sooooo depressing and bland ). This is only to those few that one can run into that are again, "better than thou" and want to look down their nose at you because they live in what THEY think is a "better" area. I like to turn the tables and ask them what THEIR husband does. For some reason they don't seem to thrilled in answering that question after they have pried me for info about us and I only answered it ever so blandly like it was just no big deal and wasn't THAT impressive
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Old 08-04-2009, 05:45 PM
 
16,087 posts, read 41,166,264 times
Reputation: 6376
Well there are people in a couple of let us say close-in suburbs who use the "what do you do" and "where did you go to school" or "what are your degrees" questions as almost a weapon to force you down the totem pole relative to their perceived lofty postition atop the pole.
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