Officially under contract :) relocating, excited but nerves are setting in... (Parker: apartment, house)

[Hoopia]

I think feeling nervous about such a huge financial decision is normal. We just closed yesterday and I'm a little freaked out that we now have a house more than twice as expensive are previous one. At some point you just have to say what is our money for if not to build a wonderful home for our family? I'm very frugal too but, I don't think you should feel bad about spending money on this home (especially since it speaks to you). You will be making memories that will be priceless.

[ayoitzrimz]

Originally Posted by ayoitzrimz

OP may I make a suggestion? My previous posts were deleted for being off topic (and they were), hopefully this won't. You do tend to come off as a bit of an elitist. I've seen your previous posts as well. People in Denver are much more down to earth, laid back, not counting dollars or advertising how much they make - that's all very LA / CA.

There is a bit of a disdain for people coming from LA and bringing the same mindset here. Has been for a while. Many CA / LA transplants love it here and get along well with everyone. Others find themselves left out. I suspect that coming here and talking about how much house you can afford, how a 600k house is "shoddy construction" and WAYYYYYY below your budget, and how frugal you are being even though you make SO MUCH money won't have the same effect as it did back home. Simply put, not many people here care about what you make, how you are in the entertainment industry and are *this* close to blowing up huge, or about your nest egg.

I really really urge you to keep that to yourself. This isn't jealousy talking, we do quite well ourselves, this is just a bit of advice if you don't want to feel like an outsider.

Hopefully my post won't get deleted, because this is earnest advice.

Oh and, welcome to Colorado!

Thanks for all the reputation everyone! It is much appreciated - I didn't know my post would generate so much love!

[tcmtcm]

Originally Posted by Birdie'sMom

Reading comprehension obviously isn't a strong point of yours and finances is clearly a sore spot for you. Harboring childhood issues of lack, etc…I can only imagine growing up in OC at all, let alone being poor, it would have to suck. So I'm super sorry for your hardships and issues. The only money I talk about, is my obsession with spending as little as possible and being frugal to a point of neurosis; (don't ever remember a time that, THAT was an OC/LA mentality lol..but okay) those nerves were slightly impeding on my excitement for our move. Not bragging or anything. The entire point of buying in colorado was to SAVE b/c we value money and our freedom to live stress free. I've stated on nearly every post, how money/materialism doesn't mean anything to me, beyond saving. Learn to read beyond your own insecurities, it'll save you embarrassment.

Also, at what point is enough, enough for you? You posted this snarky, extra sensitive feminine catty response, THEN you go to my inbox/reputation area and make another comment? That's weird dude. Look, I'm not those kids that bullied you back in middle school or the people you wanted to fit in with that had more than you. I'm a midwest lady at heart and value a dollar going a long way. I also value men acting like men and not getting in verbal spats over the internet with women whom they don't know. But, again that's just me. Your pettiness is actually very indicative of OC lol. We become that which we despise.

Whoa, Birdie, you called a lot of men some really nasty names in both threads. I think you may want to step back and examine yourself in the same way you told the above poster. I suspect some serious issues based on several comments and verbal attacks.


When you come on an open forum and expose personal information, be prepared for some fall-out. It's hardly fair for you to respond by calling people names, and it's hardly going to get you more support.

[AmFest]

When I first read the original post, I thought the original poster was looking for emotional support. Sure, she can afford a 1 million dollar home or pay 7k in monthly rent and probably makes about 200k/year, but moderately wealthy people have just the same financial concerns as less wealthy ones. And then she started calling people names, at which point I realized perhaps the purpose of this thread was more to show off her wealth and "frugality" than to seek sympathy.

The OP, I don't know you. Maybe you're doing this unintentionally. Maybe it's a SoCal attitude, I don't know. The advice people have given you here may be nonsensical or condescending to you, but it makes sense to a lot of us Colorado people. If anything, you should thank them for giving you honest advice at the risk of appearing critical. In real life, people would rather ignore you than tell you anything, and you'll never understand.

[guyatwork37]

Originally Posted by AmFest

When I first read the original post, I thought the original poster was looking for emotional support. Sure, she can afford a 1 million dollar home or pay 7k in monthly rent and probably makes about 200k/year, but moderately wealthy people have just the same financial concerns as less wealthy ones. And then she started calling people names, at which point I realized perhaps the purpose of this thread was more to show off her wealth and "frugality" than to seek sympathy.

The OP, I don't know you. Maybe you're doing this unintentionally. Maybe it's a SoCal attitude, I don't know. The advice people have given you here may be nonsensical or condescending to you, but it makes sense to a lot of us Colorado people. If anything, you should thank them for giving you honest advice at the risk of appearing critical. In real life, people would rather ignore you than tell you anything, and you'll never understand.

Please don't group all of us So.Cal people in that same boat. Some of us just want to make a better life for our families by moving somewhere else and move away from, well, all of this nonsense

[seethelight]

Originally Posted by alloo66

Don't stress things always work out.

What an absurd statement. Things DON'T always work out.

[ImNotDedYet]

Congrats on being under contract!

Humans, naturally fear change, and this is a big change. I'm assuming you had some misgivings upon getting married as well, no? You'll adjust with a bit of time, and I'm guessing you'll like it here. I have a friend who's in production that lives here and jet sets from here to LA and NYC as well as around the world. It's a bit of a grind, but worth it for him. My guess is it will be for you and hubby as well, especially given the "connectedness" of the world now.

And here's one thing that you and your husband should probably be aware of, which may help you making friends and adjusting to a new city. People in Denver have long heard from people (Californians and Texans in particular) how great their previous location was, how great they are, etc. and it's grated on people here. So when Denver-ites hear this kind of thing, they instantly go into "here we go again mode." I can see how this would happen based on your post and how you presented the information, and I can also see how you saying those things in that manner doesn't make you think it sounds bad at all. So, my recommendation - keep the amount you paid for rent in LA, the fact you're both in "entertainment" etc. to yourselves as you meet people here. Just be people and you'll be much better accepted.

An example from a night out at dinner a few years ago - my ex and I were seated with another couple at a high end restaurant inviting a big-named chef to do a special dinner. The man we were seated with merely said he worked for the Broncos, not that he was a pro bowler, (which he was the previous year) not even a player, just worked for them. It took me half the dinner before I could put two and two together and figure out he wasn't a video editor or something. (in my defense, I'm a Bears fan, so I don't really care too much about the Broncos)

Anyways, best wishes on the closing process, moving and enjoying your new home. (I just closed a couple months ago after having rented for a few years after my divorce)

[guyatwork37]

OP, where did you end up deciding to buy? You brought up a lot of places in your other thread and I'm curious where your going to settle down. I'm moving in a couple of months and still trying to figure that part out

[Birdie'sMom]

Originally Posted by ImNotDedYet

Congrats on being under contract!

Humans, naturally fear change, and this is a big change. I'm assuming you had some misgivings upon getting married as well, no? You'll adjust with a bit of time, and I'm guessing you'll like it here. I have a friend who's in production that lives here and jet sets from here to LA and NYC as well as around the world. It's a bit of a grind, but worth it for him. My guess is it will be for you and hubby as well, especially given the "connectedness" of the world now.

And here's one thing that you and your husband should probably be aware of, which may help you making friends and adjusting to a new city. People in Denver have long heard from people (Californians and Texans in particular) how great their previous location was, how great they are, etc. and it's grated on people here. So when Denver-ites hear this kind of thing, they instantly go into "here we go again mode." I can see how this would happen based on your post and how you presented the information, and I can also see how you saying those things in that manner doesn't make you think it sounds bad at all. So, my recommendation - keep the amount you paid for rent in LA, the fact you're both in "entertainment" etc. to yourselves as you meet people here. Just be people and you'll be much better accepted.

An example from a night out at dinner a few years ago - my ex and I were seated with another couple at a high end restaurant inviting a big-named chef to do a special dinner. The man we were seated with merely said he worked for the Broncos, not that he was a pro bowler, (which he was the previous year) not even a player, just worked for them. It took me half the dinner before I could put two and two together and figure out he wasn't a video editor or something. (in my defense, I'm a Bears fan, so I don't really care too much about the Broncos)

Anyways, best wishes on the closing process, moving and enjoying your new home. (I just closed a couple months ago after having rented for a few years after my divorce)

Hi. Thanks for the well wishes and advice. The good news is, in the normal, real life world, I do not and would not bring up what I do, what I pay, where I live nor where I'm from/how great my previous 'city' was etc. lol. When I read city-data, and even the messages I would get from mods, would be to give ALL info in relation to, for example, budget for a home, so that ppl could properly recommend areas. I've also seen folks get annoyed when posters aren't specific enough, b/c they don't feel like they can properly address their questions. Either way, since I'm leaving LA out of choice, and not job etc, I really have zero intentions of brining up how 'great' it was/is. I promise. lol. That's not how I roll. We also intend on changing our plates on our vehicles immediately LA is just a place to me. Land. A geographical location. My career is just a title, not a definition of my whole. My character, integrity and how I live, how I'm of service to others, to this Earth, what I leave to my children as a spiritual being having a human experience in this realm, not what I have, or accumulated, defines me to me.

I think we'll like it there too. We've loved it every time we've gone. All of my husband's college friends are from there and my uncle has been there for over 40+ years and truly enjoys it. (obviously, since he hasn't left It's those first time buyer jitters, more than anything. This isn't a vacation home, where part of the year it's generating income from renters, this is our 'Home,' so the nerves get a bit riled. My husband on the other hand, not a ripple or wave in his waters about it.

Congrats on your own closing. That's exciting stuff. Best of wishes to you on this next chapter of life that you embark on.

[Birdie'sMom]

Originally Posted by guyatwork37

OP, where did you end up deciding to buy? You brought up a lot of places in your other thread and I'm curious where your going to settle down. I'm moving in a couple of months and still trying to figure that part out

Hi there.
Parker.
Good luck on your search and future move!