Moving past the negative self talk (daily basis, work out, lose weight, exercising)

[southkakkatlantan]

I have a close friend who is a size 2 and never talks negative about herself...she is indeed a gorgeous woman. I also have a friend who is more like a 16 and is the exact same way...she is also comfortable in her body and although she knows she needs to lose weight and works on it, she loves her body as it is now so I'm sure once she gets to where she wants to be weight-wise, she'll continue to love it just the same.


Me? I went from a 10 to an 8 last year, then to a 6, and now I'm struggling between a 6 and 8. I was a 4 most of my 20s. Now in my late 30s I find I can't continue the stress eating that is my downfall, or it has an immediate impact on my weight/size. Luckily I do work out on average 3-4 days a week (shoot for 5 days most weeks actually), but I make no progress because my diet isn't right. Work is very challenging and every time something stressful comes up I'm "eating my feelings". And food is my comfort, too...it makes me feel so good to have dense, high calorie meals and desserts on a daily basis. If I weren't working out as much as I do right now I'd be back to a 10, pushing a 12.


But I digress...what I really wanted to get at here is that I feel as though, if I really loved my body I would treat it better. I would care more about the impact every thing I put into is having on not just how I look, but how I feel and how my body functions. I don't feel that way; right now I look at my body and basically see that "I've failed to meet my own standards." And in feeling that way, I get stressed and guess what...I want to eat badly.


I feel like I'm not in the right mental space to be able to accomplish my goals of having a nicer body. I stopped weighing myself because I literally would feel a sense of "failure" every time the scale moves up 2 lbs...and if it goes down a few lbs I just think "you still have so much further to go." I desperately want to get out of this cycle of thinking but I'm not sure how. I hope this doesn't come off as rambling; has anybody else struggled with this and overcome it?

[bluemonday]

First off, don't think you are alone. Your friends may talk negative to themselves, its one of those things a lot of people barely admit to.

But I will say one thing that has helped me to lose weight and keep it into prospective without psychologically beating myself up for missteps. I weight myself daily, but I DO NOT start beating myself up for two weeks! Remember the body could fluctuate +/- 2 lbs. in any one given day. I allow all positive changes to take two weeks to get any affect because some people just lose weight slower than others. Remember, if you start doing a certain exercise everyday, it may not show up on your body for weeks. Same with eating habits. Slow and steady wins the race.

Find your threshold, and try not to beat yourself up over infractions, and encourage yourself by allowing yourself time.

[Jessica1989]

Don't ever put your down and talk negatively about your body. You can only do your best and that's good enough. As long as you're living a healthy lifestyle and staying active, you should be very proud of yourself because that's way more than a lot of people. Just exercising you enjoy doing which can motivate you to do those more often. You'll see results I promise, it just takes time. And everyone's body works differently so don't compare yourself to others. Stay positive and keep doing what you're doing