Frustrations of a parent of a junior high student

[Ivorytickler]

Originally Posted by germaine2626

This thread about school and home communication reminded me of an experience of mine from about 20 years ago. I was teaching Cognitively Delayed students at the primary level. I tried to keep all of the parents informed about how their child was doing by having notebooks that went to and from home each day. I would respond to questions the same day, send home a weekly classroom newsletter, write brief notes a couple of times a week and also write a detailed note to each parent every week about how they their child was doing.

The mother of one of my new students (let call her DP for Demanding Parent) wanted a lot more information & contact. Always wanting to be accommodating I did everything that she asked of me, daily long, detailed notes home, weekly charts and written summaries of all academic areas, plus a weekend phone call to talk to both parents (usually lasted 30 to 60 minutes). In addition, DP would call me several times a week. This was before phones in every classroom so I would be paged in my classroom and have to walk to the far end of the building and climb up a flight of stairs to take each phone call in the school office. Also, DP would bring her daughter or pick her up several times per week and would always have questions about the day, want to discuss curriculum, make special requests, etc and I would cheerfully talk with her as long as she wanted to talk.

Six weeks into the semester DP requested a meeting with my principal and me. My contact with this parent was triple what I had with even the most demanding of my previous parents. I was excited that DP wanted to meet with us and I expected her to praise my actions. Boy, was I wrong! Demanding Parent severely criticized me for not giving her adequate parent contact and worst of all the principal agreed with her and really chewed me out.

At that point I realized that there are some parents that you can’t please no matter how hard you tried. I am so glad I am retired and don’t have to deal with parents and principals any longer.

No matter what we do, our admins take the parent's side.

[DewDropInn]

Originally Posted by Ivorytickler

No matter what we do, our admins take the parent's side.

Sorry, I've never caught this if you've mentioned it: do you work for a private or public school?

[Ivorytickler]

Originally Posted by DewDropInn

Sorry, I've never caught this if you've mentioned it: do you work for a private or public school?

I've worked for a charter school and now a public school. Neither would tell parents they were wrong unless it was blatant. I have to admit I felt more supported in the charter school by my admins when it came to parent complaints but I was less supported when it came to dealing with issues in my classroom. I can send a student to the office and expect a response now. In the charter school, the most likely response would be to send them back . They crammed small classrooms with 35+ students and then faulted the teacher if they couldn't keep control of every student in their class.

It's the opposite here. My admins are more likely to side with the parents in a dispute on grading but they'll support me 100% on behavior issues. As I said, parents in our district scream LOUDLY. They'll go running to the school board if they don't feel the school is hearing them. If nothing else, they get their complaints about the teacher aired over cable TV. Any other parents who are unhappy with the particular teacher are then more likely to jump on the band wagon. It can spiral out of control fast. Knowing that, I really can't fault my admins. They're just trying to put out fires but I don't feel protected at all.

The bottom line is the parents are our customer. When push comes to shove, it will be their opinion that matters. IMO this is one of the things wrong with education. It's beeing micro managed by parents and politicians who know nothing about education.