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That is unfortunate.....both that they think you were 'amassing power' (seriously? What power? the power of information????) and that you are going to back out from participating, especially if you have come to think that you were taking everything 'so seriously.' When we volunteer for these things, isn't that why we do it? because we take it seriously? They are losing a dedicated committee member so their loss.
More time to yourself and other more productive things.
Thanks for your support. It's hard to know what people are thinking. They always say they want parental involvement, but they want it on their terms, which is natural I guess. Although, I have my own terms too.
With that said, if anyone should get energy in the schools it's the teachers. Specifically my kids teachers. That I'll keep in mind moving forward too. I really appreciate being able to talk about this freely! I can't do it on facebook and complain publicly. So, thank you and other folk here responding.
They didn't want you BECAUSE you were involved. Yes, you did have the power of information. You understood the budget which means you can ask uncomfortable questions. That might mess up their plans.
They didn't want you BECAUSE you were involved. Yes, you did have the power of information. You understood the budget which means you can ask uncomfortable questions. That might mess up their plans.
They didn't want you BECAUSE you were involved. Yes, you did have the power of information. You understood the budget which means you can ask uncomfortable questions. That might mess up their plans.
You're making a lot of assumptions based on only hearing one side of the story.
You're making a lot of assumptions based on only hearing one side of the story.
I don't even know what the other side of the story really is. I asked them if it was content related or if the applications were blinded. I was actively looking for any reasonable reason. They literally said they wanted someone who was not actively involved. And again I can understand that for activities that do not require a breadth of knowledge, but for this particular instance I don't get it. You are a retired administrator. Your gut feeling without really knowing anything about me or my groups or activities is to not select me. That's due to your own biases and it highlights what's likely part of the issue here.
So I'm just stepping back. I guess my group was kind of a PTO but for the school committee. They don't need that. Although, I'm not sure how I will handle it if parents continue to reach out to me for help. I am hoping my admin keep the group going.
SciMom, it is really commendable that you are so involved and have done all this work, bravo! And maybe now it’s time to step back some and be with your family. There really should be more involved parents. I wish you all the best!
I would not have selected you, either. You're not an elected representative, yet you are amassing power (whether you realize it or not). No one person should dominate. There are what -- hundreds or thousands of parents in your school system. Yes, get more people involved, thereby broadening perspectives.
Quote:
Originally Posted by phetaroi
You're making a lot of assumptions based on only hearing one side of the story.
You said yourself you wouldn't have picked her either. The alternatives are those who study and care about the issues and those who don't. Should they select someone who doesn't understand instead?
I don't even know what the other side of the story really is. I asked them if it was content related or if the applications were blinded. I was actively looking for any reasonable reason. They literally said they wanted someone who was not actively involved. And again I can understand that for activities that do not require a breadth of knowledge, but for this particular instance I don't get it. You are a retired administrator. Your gut feeling without really knowing anything about me or my groups or activities is to not select me. That's due to your own biases and it highlights what's likely part of the issue here.
So I'm just stepping back. I guess my group was kind of a PTO but for the school committee. They don't need that. Although, I'm not sure how I will handle it if parents continue to reach out to me for help. I am hoping my admin keep the group going.
But I'm talking about the people here responding to you.
You said yourself you wouldn't have picked her either. The alternatives are those who study and care about the issues and those who don't. Should they select someone who doesn't understand instead?
Let's put it this way -- they should select people with somewhat of an open-mind on whatever the issues are.
Let me give you an example.
Our PTA was rather incestuous. What I mean by that is that each spring, the people already sitting on the PTA board would select the following year's PTA board members. No general election. And who would they pick? People exactly like themselves. Translation: white, upper-middle to upper class. In 20 years I don't remember a Black or Latino parent on the PTA; there were a few Asian parents involved.
One day the PTA Board came and said they had a great idea for that year's "Eight Grade Party" (our county did not allow 8th grade 'graduations' from middle school, but there could be a party/dance celebration). What was their great idea? That all the eight graders would fly to Hawaii for a party. Not an ounce of realization of the financial situation of a large minority of our students.
Teaching kids to read. If I had a committee of parents who were going to give input on that, I wouldn't want a committee composed of only parents who are fervent about phonics.
I have been a teacher and a concerned parent, both. So I'd like to present a non-biased view. But based on my experience when my children were in high school it was plain to all us parents that our feedback and participation, other than as recipients of selected information and go-fers, was unwelcome.
The PTA meetings were discarded so there was no parent group voice at all. Personal visits to the staff over concerns were treated casually and glossed over with the usual, "Never mind. We're taking care of it." A friend who complained over her daughter being sexually harassed was dismissed with a literal pat on the back and a reference to how crazy things get when there's a full moon.
Criminal matters were referred to the Police Department which referred parents back to the school. At the time it was confusing given the constant public message that parents should participate. In retrospect I realize this was a school under siege from all sides with difficult, nearly insoluble problems. Keeping one aspect of the problems at bay with lack of information was an expedient way to reduce the pressure staff was experiencing.
A meddling parent can raise eight kinds of hell. An informed, intelligent one can raise awareness of the impossible. Right or wrong, I can understand the motivation.
One approach to really serious problems is to "let them blow over." Another is to name them. The first is definitely safer.
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