[mrydlfns]

I live in n.w. atlanta now, but pretty much lived in s.w.fl all my life. I moved up here last summer and fell in love. I separated from my husband down there and my kids and my two grandchildren are there too. I miss them so much. my husband and I are trying to make it work. I decided to move back to fl because family not moving up here. I even got a transfer with my job. my problem is that I hate living in fl and love it up here. how do i choose between he



re and there. I am scared that I will move and then regret it cause of how much I like it here. but if I don't move then i will be letting my family down, plus my job that I interviewed for.so happens that I got job back where I was working before and asst. manager excited to have me back. when i found out today that I got the job I started having second thoughts. now I don't know what to do

[Honeycrisp]

Having 2nd thoughts is perfectly normal. While it's nice you want to be near your family, you have to do what's best for you in the long run, you can move near your family and still be miserable if you don't like the area etc. No place is perfect. Would re-evaluate the job in FL and where you are now (am assuming you're working where you're living now) and decide whether you want to make your marriage work and take it from there. A stable good job is very important, what's the unemployment rate in each area and can you get a job where you live now (if you're not employed). Just rem. no place is perfect, sometimes you have to compromise. Where you live now isn't all that far from where your family is, you both can visit back and forth should you choose to stay in your location. Make a list of what you have going for your in each area (the positives and negatives), that may give you a better perspective, seeing it in black and white. Good luck.

[bustaduke]

Originally Posted by mrydlfns

I live in n.w. atlanta now, but pretty much lived in s.w.fl all my life. I moved up here last summer and fell in love. I separated from my husband down there and my kids and my two grandchildren are there too. I miss them so much. my husband and I are trying to make it work. I decided to move back to fl because family not moving up here. I even got a transfer with my job. my problem is that I hate living in fl and love it up here. how do i choose between he



re and there. I am scared that I will move and then regret it cause of how much I like it here. but if I don't move then i will be letting my family down, plus my job that I interviewed for.so happens that I got job back where I was working before and asst. manager excited to have me back. when i found out today that I got the job I started having second thoughts. now I don't know what to do

What is the reason for your separation? Are you going through a mid life crises? Yes women go through them also. Was your husband miss treating you?

All I can tell you is to do what makes you happy. And if that means staying in Atlanta then stay. No mater what you do you will always miss your family but you have to also be happy with yourself first before you can be happy with everyone else.

busta

[MissLatte]

Honeycrisp has great advice. I recently moved back from florida myself and it was not place I would move back to. The list is your best bet! Live where you feel the best. Good luck!

[yamahastar]

Strangers can't possibly give you advise on major decisions in your life.

[mrydlfns]

Well I was offered the position in FL. its at a bank, so same company. No my husband doesn't mistreat me, but have had other problems. my main pull is my grandkids. but nothing else interests me there. I am getting feedback from all sources. sometimes strangers can give life experiences.I. am still debating it but have to give an answer to my job soon...any more suggestions?

[mrydlfns]

I have also thought about trying it for a year and reevaluating then. but would that be more harmful and unfair...say to grandkids, job, husband, etc. this is my delimma

[bbronston]

Here's my take for whatever it worth. I once read that the list of priorities in life should be God, Family, Country, and Self, and to a certain extent, I suppose I agree. Anyway, even if you don't believe in God, and you don't care about or place your country ahead of your self, you are still left with Family first. I don't have grandkids yet but I can't wait until I have them because I absolutely love kids and watching them learn and grow. I'm not saying that you should be selfless but I am saying that life is short and kids (as you know) grow up incredibly fast. There's such a tiny window in which to become a part of their lives. I'd make that the priority for the short time you have to make them the priority. But, please, only take these opinions as a very tiny part of your decision making process....if at all!

[Sunny-Days-in-Florida]

Go with your heart.

If you are financially able to make the move and your heart is with your family and grandkids you cannot go wrong.

I would tell you that have a backup plan and finances ready to move back to Atlanta if things do not work out.

For me, not knowing your situation, I would make the move if my finances were in order just to be close to the family and grandkids as you mentioned.

My kids just lost a Grandmother and I can tell your first hand just how much Grandparents mean to the kids.

None of us can tell you what to do because we do not have enough information but as I mentioned above I would make the move if I had it well planned out, able financially to make the move, can start a savings to move back to Atlanta if needed etc.

[mrydlfns]

I have pretty much decided to stay here. I feel really bad for my family. Once I told my husband about the doubts that I had, he pretty much told me to stay. I really think my daughter wants me there. She is the mother to my grandchildren. She just doesn't seem to understand my dislike of FL. She feels that I am giving up a great job,(was in the same branch that I left to come here), and that if I give it up then I won't be given that opportunity again. This is possibly true, and one of the consequences of my decision. I have no problem making the drive down there, and can hopefully schedule my vacations to take long weekends and go every other month at least. It has been a very emotional decision for me to make. I don't like to miss my grandchildren, but I don't want to be in an environment that will not please me. By the way, I do have a lot of family here. My mom, sister, brother, and their families all left FL to be here. So I am not without support. Thanks for the advise from everyone.