Cooking with love...or resentment! (ingredient, meals, taste, dinner)

[CArizona]

Some people cook "with love" no matter how busy or stressed they are at the time. They might get a little cranky but all in all they just don't want to spoil the meal...But I've been around some people who play "suffering martyr" in the kitchen and they seem full of resentment about what they have to do...Their food might taste good but they ruin the atmosphere by being so cranky and full of self pity...Have you noticed any of this? I sure have! ....I want to make meals "fun" and full of "love" and "togetherness." I don't want to make loved ones feel "bad" just because I have to cook...I have so many happy memories from my meals as a child with my parents and family....Things weren't always "perfect" in our house. We had "ups" and "downs" and "upsets" at times. But somehow someway my parents always had a knack of making meals happy and special no matter what....I had an Aunt who played "suffering martyr" in the kitchen. It was no fun to eat at her house. She made everyone feel "bad" and guilty because she had to cook. YUK!

[George Chong]

Love is the secret ingredient with all cooking and baking! If I feel martyred about having to cook - I just go out for dinner or order take out. Yes one needs to eat, but I have a choice as to I am going to cook or not.

Besides, resentment taste bitter to me.

[Bulldogdad]

Originally Posted by CArizona

Some people cook "with love" no matter how busy or stressed they are at the time. They might get a little cranky but all in all they just don't want to spoil the meal...But I've been around some people who play "suffering martyr" in the kitchen and they seem full of resentment about what they have to do...Their food might taste good but they ruin the atmosphere by being so cranky and full of self pity...Have you noticed any of this? I sure have! ....I want to make meals "fun" and full of "love" and "togetherness." I don't want to make loved ones feel "bad" just because I have to cook...I have so many happy memories from my meals as a child with my parents and family....Things weren't always "perfect" in our house. We had "ups" and "downs" and "upsets" at times. But somehow someway my parents always had a knack of making meals happy and special no matter what....I had an Aunt who played "suffering martyr" in the kitchen. It was no fun to eat at her house. She made everyone feel "bad" and guilty because she had to cook. YUK!

So your family is responsible for the Happy Meal.

I agree if you don't want to cook get the hell out of the kitchen. I tell this to everyone I see exhibiting this attitude when it happens. On several occasions over the years myself and my family have ended up eating out after walking out on a drama scene. Needless to say those people have never cooked for me again.

[CArizona]

Thanks for your posts...I guess it helps when family members show a little appreciation for what the cook "does." It's no fun to feel "used" or "abused" or "taken for granted." But parents can help their kids appreciate what is "done for them" without getting into the "suffering martyr mode." Don't you think?...I get excited about what I make and my excitement probably "rubs off." Cooking can be a "fun adventure" and "creative."...Sure it's work and the clean-up isn't always fun. But so what?... It's nice to have interest and support and some praise and credit once in awhile....I've had meals with friends where no one says "thank you" to the cook....Where no one thinks about complimenting the cook... I always do because it's just in my nature and this is the way I was "raised." But I don't cook for the praise and "thank you's." I just like to make meals special. It's nice when family members can share a meal together at home. Maybe I am just "old-fashioned" but I don't care.