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By the way, if you like Chapel Hill, you would probably like Ithaca. It is more affordable and has the Ivy League influence from Cornell. People don't realize that Cornell has public and private schools within its campus. So, it's part Northeastern private college and part land grant institution. There's also Ithaca College too.
Syracuse is a little more down to earth than Rochester. Both are relatively affordable overall and traffic isn't that bad in either place.
I'm surprised that Albany would be a 7 and Raleigh is a 4, considering the amount of growth. If that is the case, I guess that Syracuse would be a 3 and Rochester is a 3.5-4. All three of those Upstate NY metros have less people and probably shorter commutes. Cost of living is probably on par, with Syracuse being the most affordable.
I don't know if Raleigh is truly a 4, that's what someone else mentioned. I would be surprised myself if it were, because I think the metro has about 1.75 million people. I do know that Raleigh/Durham/Cary is spread out over a very, very large area, making it quite suburban. That may be the reason for the low number.
Do you think Rochester or Pittsburgh is better poised for a revival? I have no issue moving to a shrinking metro, however, it would be nice to live in an area that is on the upswing (fully recognizing that the entire country seems to be on a downswing).
I never understood how Southerners are more conservative than Northerners but have a more laid back approach to life.
Conservatives can be pretty laid back. An element of traditional conservatism is almost "enjoy what you have, in moderation, don't try to change everything because you'll never get perfection anyway." So Southern conservatism has at times been a bit of "we've always done it this way, let's just go with the flow of that." Downside being sometimes Southerners were loathe to change things that really needed changing.
Anyway from my perspective as a small-town person I think every city would be a bit "rat racey." Cheyenne, Wyoming is counted as a city. I guess it's listed as low in stress and relatively quiet.
I don't know if Raleigh is truly a 4, that's what someone else mentioned. I would be surprised myself if it were, because I think the metro has about 1.75 million people. I do know that Raleigh/Durham/Cary is spread out over a very, very large area, making it quite suburban. That may be the reason for the low number.
Do you think Rochester or Pittsburgh is better poised for a revival? I have no issue moving to a shrinking metro, however, it would be nice to live in an area that is on the upswing (fully recognizing that the entire country seems to be on a downswing).
Pittsburgh might be better poised due to recreating itself and it is bigger. Rochester actually gained people this past decade and has, slowly, but surely, for a while.
I'm not asking you to denigrate anything, but can you elaborate on why you think this? I'm genuinely curious.
If you want my opinion, I feel that this entire area is one giant business where nothing is valued except money, possessions, and appearances. It has a radius that stretches from eastern Long Island to west of Allentown. It stretches from the Poconos to Philly and the South Jersey shore towns. In my job I associate with people from more rural areas (due to the work I do) and mainly people from the Southern states and Western states (particularly Colorado, Montana, and Wyoming, and Texas) . Some of those people have come here for several months at a time and simply can't believe how we live in NJ. Its foreign to them, and although they are reluctant to insult this state, they have told me that they count the days to leave. I believe them because almost all of the people I work with feel this way. I can't even assess how they really feel because they are usually too nice to tell me!
Hunterdon County is a small but constantly encroached upon island in the middle of this. People west of me commute into parts east and have that mentality. People east, south and north do as well. And as this little area becomes more and more desirable to the masses who, like me, wish to escape, pressure builds around here and it becomes more and more like it.
Any house, even the tiniest shack, comes with $7k taxes at a minimum. Plus $250k minimum for even the worst house that needs tons of work. NOTHING here has central AC, except the newer homes, which, again, you're looking at $350k min and $10k taxes. I could go on. Even if I could afford it here, my personality just doesn't fit the overriding mentality here.
I'm sure that someone will come on here and tell me that "I'm negative", or "life is what you make it", or "if your unhappy here, you'll be unhappy anywhere", or any number of platitudes that people say because they are stuck or prefer to bury their head in the sand and grind it out. I don't believe any of those statements are true.
Where you live, and the attributes of your surroundings, is of utmost importance to some people. As important as the air they breathe. Without it, they feel like they are suffocating.
I think some places aren't right for some people and it sounds like you're in a place wrong for you. If I could leave where I was I probably would, even if it were just to go 30-40 miles away.
I do know of places where they don't judge on money or possession so much, but as a rule those places do still judge people. The ones I know of they judge on your religion and possibly family-background. I could see someone preferring that though and in some ways I prefer that. However I don't want to assume how you feel on that.
You don't want places where people are focused on luxury, corporations, and "covetousness." (Wanting what neighbors have or better) However they will likely focus or care about something, so what do you prefer as that?
So far offhand I would think Iowa, Nebraska, and parts of Appalachia or the Ozarks might fit what you mean. I mean if you're okay with judgments based on how well you conform to the neighbors or what your family's like or your religion. That's not really sarcasm, I think some would prefer those be the judgments.
Well, for my input, I wouldn't look at any of those cities. Seattle is pretty laid back or career oriented, if that's what you want. Nobody is going to really be interested in keeping up with the Joneses. People don't work themselves to death (unless you work for Microsoft or Boeing).
First off I would so rate DC a 10. I lived there and despised the status-driven, self-absorbed way of life there. I moved to Durham/Chapel Hill afterwards and found it to be a breath of fresh air, particularly in Durham and Chapel Hill's "adjoining twin town" of Carrboro. Utilizing your criteria I'd give it a 4. As a footnote I would eliminate Raleigh for the most part as well as the neighboring city of Cary. Both feature a similar dynamic to DC and other Northeast cities due to many transplants not content to leave that lifestyle behind. To give you an idea, Cary is thought to be an acronym by many locals..
Containment Area for Relocated Yankees...
On the one hand, the people in Durham always seem to play the intellectual card (when convenient) due to Duke or, as some call it, The University of Northern New Jersey at Durham. On the other hand, they also try to play the card that Raleigh is full of Northerners when it's convenient to do so.
The reality is that the entire Triangle area is very laid back. Even the good folks from the NE chill out after a year and become the area's biggest defenders. To claim that Raleigh and Cary are like DC (rat-racey) while Durham and Chapel Hill are not is ridiculous. All Triangle cities are fairly intellectual but they are all pretty laid back and casual.
By the way, if you like Chapel Hill, you would probably like Ithaca. It is more affordable and has the Ivy League influence from Cornell. People don't realize that Cornell has public and private schools within its campus. So, it's part Northeastern private college and part land grant institution. There's also Ithaca College too.
Ithaca is the only place I have ever been where a woman literally cussed me out for opening the door for her. I was really put off. I was like....listen #%$&, I would open the door for ANYONE following me.....don't think you are so special. Perhaps it was a one-off situation? Otherwise, I enjoyed my time there and the 100 mile bike ride around Cayuga Lake. It's a beautiful area.
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