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Well both of thems lives will change no matter what.There is a old saying that you either learn the easy way or teh hardway. At some point they are likely to learn the hard way.Nothing you can do if that is their chioce.I really dount that the 16 year old is ready or your son from counds of it;so the child maybe lucky i havign the grandparent raise the child in ways.
It's not illegal in Montana. My son and the mother have decided to have her live at home until she graduates early, then rent an apartment. He wants to work days while she goes to school and go to college part time at night. I can only support them in thier decisions. I'm just worried about the other grandparents wanting to raise the baby when it has two parents who want to do it. I invited other gramma to lunch and we had a good talk. I expressed my concerns but also told her my sons concerns were more valid as the baby is his and his girlfriends responsibility. I felt relieved after our talk and will wait to see how things go after the first doctor appointment.
Your son is technically an adult, so I'd argue that his views are definitely far more valid than the girl's mother's. Even with the girl being a minor, legally she has the right to raise her child the way she sees fit.
I will say that the child will probably be much better off with the grandparents playing a big role. A 16 year old is certainly not mature enough to raise a child on her own and, to a lesser extent, neither is a 19 year old.
Your son is technically an adult, so I'dargue that his views are definitely far more valid than the girl's mother's. Even with the girl being a minor, legally she has the right to raise her child the way she sees fit.
This didn't make much sense, at least not to me. Are you saying her son has more valid concerns or he doesn't? If it's the latter I think you misread her post as she said she expressed her concerns to the girlfriend's mother, but said she also told the girlfriend's mother that her (OP) son's concerns were more valid than her (OP) own.
This didn't make much sense, at least not to me. Are you saying her son has more valid concerns or he doesn't? If it's the latter I think you misread her post as she said she expressed her concerns to the girlfriend's mother, but said she also told the girlfriend's mother that her (OP) son's concerns were more valid than her (OP) own.
Yes I suppose you are right re: this part: "I expressed my concerns but also told her my sons concerns were more valid." I guess I didn't read closely enough.
But then..."I'm just worried about the other grandparents wanting to raise the baby when it has two parents who want to do it." So this indicates that she is afraid of the other grandmother interfering.
Yes I suppose you are right re: this part: "I expressed my concerns but also told her my sons concerns were more valid." I guess I didn't read closely enough.
But then..."I'm just worried about the other grandparents wanting to raise the baby when it has two parents who want to do it." So this indicates that she is afraid of the other grandmother interfering.
Well that is a valid concern. I too think that they (her son and the girlfriend) are going to need as much support as they can get for awhile as long as it's support and not taking over and completely doing all of the raising by the girlfriend's parents. If the raising is done mainly by the girlfriend's parents and not by the young parents then they, the girlfreind especially, might think having children is easy and decide to do it again and again. That to me is an even bigger concern especially given that the girlfriend stopped taking her BC in the first place so she could end up pregnant.
Well that is a valid concern. I too think that they (her son and the girlfriend) are going to need as much support as they can get for awhile as long as it's support and not taking over and completely doing all of the raising by the girlfriend's parents. If the raising is done mainly by the girlfriend's parents and not by the young parents then they, the girlfreind especially, might think having children is easy and decide to do it again and again. That to me is an even bigger concern especially given that the girlfriend stopped taking her BC in the first place so she could end up pregnant.
Yes...this seems to indicate that her maturity level is even lower than that of the average 16 year old. Which makes me think someone needs to pound some reality into her.
It's not illegal in Montana. My son and the mother have decided to have her live at home until she graduates early, then rent an apartment. He wants to work days while she goes to school and go to college part time at night. I can only support them in thier decisions. I'm just worried about the other grandparents wanting to raise the baby when it has two parents who want to do it. I invited other gramma to lunch and we had a good talk. I expressed my concerns but also told her my sons concerns were more valid as the baby is his and his girlfriends responsibility. I felt relieved after our talk and will wait to see how things go after the first doctor appointment.
Wedding bells???? Is the child going to be born out of wedlock?
It's not illegal in Montana. My son and the mother have decided to have her live at home until she graduates early, then rent an apartment. He wants to work days while she goes to school and go to college part time at night. I can only support them in thier decisions. I'm just worried about the other grandparents wanting to raise the baby when it has two parents who want to do it. I invited other gramma to lunch and we had a good talk. I expressed my concerns but also told her my sons concerns were more valid as the baby is his and his girlfriends responsibility. I felt relieved after our talk and will wait to see how things go after the first doctor appointment.
I'm glad you had a good talk with the other grandma. Maybe it will work out ok. I do wonder who will be watching the baby while mom is at school and dad is at work. But, I'm glad to hear they want to go to college.
honestly? why force them into marriage at this young age? It won't solve anything.
When their relationship ends (which you know as well as I do is incredibly likely)...it will at the bare minimum provide some protection for her son.
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