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Very familiar with Milo's. Much better than the Nestea and Lipton stuff, but not sweet enough for my taste. It's still the best store bought tea though IMO.
Not sweet enough??
If I must buy store bought tea, I buy Red Diamond.
And you'll be recruited to a good swing group which normally does not accept 'single males' (nobody wants to swing with sissies: they ruin the vibe).
You, on the other hand, possess the Golden Key. Go forth, ye big, butch paragon of hillbillyness, and enjoy the feast laid out before ye.... because (to use the state's old ad slogan)It's yours in Mississippi!
First I heard of it was when a Gay businessman (who taught me more about the real workings of 'Missippi Bidnis' than I learned in eight years of Economics) who lived at the Barrington (gated like an embassy... still THE premier condo address in the state) was telling about some swingerdude who also lived there, who (over two decades back) would get up swing groups, and head down to New Orleans in a tacky stretch limousine (champagne, half-nekkid floozies...probably playing Doobie Brothers on the sound system, while watching lame pornos on the little TV... in other words, about like a bunch of potheads getting nasty in a trailer...only it was a smaller trailer, and the wheels worked. Can somebody gimme an "eeeeeeew!"?). Actually, come to think of it, that part I heard from a famous decorator who was blackballed from the 'League' (probably because you could hear her smackin' gum from a block away...) was repeating 'on dit' going around town about that bunch, while my Decorator and I were trying to go through her Scalamandre Brocatelle samples in peace (hey...we were young, and he didn't have as big a sample room as she...yet...). Anyway, my friend who brokered high-dollar capital goods, was telling about his one experience with a female. "He (Swingerdude) and some of his buddies had some ol' gal in the Jacuzzi, and were passin' her around, and so I slipped off my Brooks Brothers trunks, too."
I know. That's why when we're in some hotel room with a hot tub, DH knows better than to try to get me into it, before it's been drained and scrubbed with Comet.
But back to your question... I guess next, we heard about some alleged gun runner out-from-town a bit, who kept on a buildin' on his little place in the woods. When trash like us get a little money, we tend to go a bit wild (unless we have experts guiding us, and are smart enough to defer to those experts). We're talkin' rocks, gargoyles, moat, secret passages, towers (one with an elevator), a round bed, secret tunnels, one-way mirrors.... One giant room is reported to have looked like a Mexican dinner theatre, with two-tiered seating, and a special elevated stage for some chick to play Rapunzel (there is speculation about the amount of clothing 'Rapunzel' and her big, strappin' 'rescuers' would have been wearing) (At this point, you think I'm making all this up, don't you?). Recently, a couple of little birds have whispered that they toured the place, and found evidence to indicate these improbable tales might be true. Well, between the garage for the Lambo/Lotus/Ferrari-whatever-tacky-zippycars and the mirror-walled Wine Cellar, there ran a passage which featured a one-way mirror looking into a smutty little room styled to resemble a south-of-the-border bordello: complete with pulsating red lights. A second one-way mirror was accessible via one of the hidden passages. Honey, you don't have to be Truman Capote or an archaeologist to guess that the goins-on in that little passion pit involved more than two people.
Okay... Next, various people from the gym gradually 'shared' with us that there was an 'elite' swing group 'on the Reservoir'. I don't think the women had to be exceptionally special, but the men had to all be bodybuilders, and possess a certain biometric trait which (if this was actually tape-measure derived, and not a subjective assessment) would put them in the top tenth of one percent in that regard). I suppose enough members of this group, who had seen him in the Locker Room, had vetted my DH as being worthy, because we were gently encouraged to try it out, every now and then. Frankly, I was tempted, because the hotties included a gorgeous psychiatrist, a gorgeous surgeon, a megahottie car dealer (but also, unfortunately, his rather vile-if-spectacular wife), various personal trainers, homebuilders... But I don't know if my fear of Pelvic Inflammatory Disease, or the sure knowledge that I'd be preoccupied with looking for stretch marks and critiquing the makeup on the other women was the reason we kept saying no. Or was it the knowledge that certain things are better (and far less sticky) when they remain just fantasies?
Anyhoo, most recently, I've heard that there's a late-middle-aged 'rich' group who hang out at the Yacht Club. And there's supposedly another, younger, 'rich' group out at Reunion (.5 to 1.5 million Dollar houses, on a manmade lake, with better-than-average-but-hardly-distinguished architectural controls). These, it seems, are more organized than the more unstructured but endemic wife-swapping that seems to go on at parties in the clubhouses out in the cheap seats where the young married live in houses that go for around .3. In the more organized groups, the indescribably icky practice of putting car keys into bowls seems to have been copied from a TV show.
Not sayin' I disapprove. But Jackson is a town where people say "She can go straight to The Bad Place!" (instead of using the 'H-word'), and spell out 'D A M N', because it's too bad to say... I just cannot fathom how people can make the jump from 'Goodie Goodie' to 'Straight toH(you know..)', and then go right back to 'Goodie Goodie' on Sunday mornings.
I wish all these people well. May all their dreams and fantasies come true. Heck: we might have been among their number, had our priorities been just a tad different. And really, it's nice to know that people can and do do things like that. Makes the world a more exciting place.
Anyhoo, most recently, I've heard that there's a late-middle-aged 'rich' group who hang out at the Yacht Club. And there's supposedly another, younger, 'rich' group out at Reunion (.5 to 1.5 million Dollar houses, on a manmade lake, with better-than-average-but-hardly-distinguished architectural controls). These, it seems, are more organized than the more unstructured but endemic wife-swapping that seems to go on at parties in the clubhouses out in the cheap seats where the young married live in houses that go for around .3. In the more organized groups, the indescribably icky practice of putting car keys into bowls seems to have been copied from a TV show.
Not sayin' I disapprove. But Jackson is a town where people say "She can go straight to The Bad Place!" (instead of using the 'H-word'), and spell out 'D A M N', because it's too bad to say... I just cannot fathom how people can make the jump from 'Goodie Goodie' to 'Straight toH(you know..)', and then go right back to 'Goodie Goodie' on Sunday mornings.
I wish all these people well. May all their dreams and fantasies come true. Heck: we might have been among their number, had our priorities been just a tad different. And really, it's nice to know that people can and do do things like that. Makes the world a more exciting place.
GG, you should consider pitching a screenplay...
Funny and deliciously scandalous. On a more serious note, what gets to me about Jackson, and the deep south in general, is the innate hypocrisy combined with the sense of entitlement amongst the privileged of the community. It's ok for "me" to engage in this type of behavior, then show up at First Baptist on Sunday morning, and support a religious-right Senate candidate based on "family values." But if gay people want to enjoy the "benefits" of marriage or provide an adoptive home for needy children, sorry, not acceptable....
I forgot all about Milo's! Interesting you brought it up. I am attending college in South-Central MO and I can't get it here according to their website. My hometown in SE Missouri however is the farthest north it is distributed. Maybe we found our new line to separate the south from other regions?
wnewberry22, I don't see how you would be regarded as a "Yankee". Usually anyone from a state that remotely supported the Confederacy during the Civil War doesn't catch anything about it as far as I know. Could be different in Mississippi however.
First I heard of it was when a Gay businessman .................................................. .....................>skip to the end
I wish all these people well. May all their dreams and fantasies come true. Heck: we might have been among their number, had our priorities been just a tad different. And really, it's nice to know that people can and do do things like that. Makes the world a more exciting place.
I tried to read through that twice and understood about 25% of it.
Sort of a free association meandering Southern Gothic Penthouse forum kind of story.......
I certainly hope you're talking about Tea, and not about the post immediately preceding...
But that does lead me to share my own helpful hints regarding Sweet Tea. These, copied from an earlier post of mine on another CityData forum (inspired by a man I saw in the restaurant in the old Downtowner Motel in Greenville - probably the last year of the Steinmart Saks Fifth Avenue Sale. Remember that nasty Mapplethorpe picture of the Man in the Polyester Suit? If you'd elected to take the SECOND semester of Art History you would remember (Don't google it! You'll be traumatized!)... Well, if he'd gained a hundred pounds over the next ten years, but was still wearin' that same suit, and had gone back home to Mississippi, and was having a fine all-you-can-eat lunch by himself, up in the old Downtowner...)
"... you'll love the food. Sooooo unlike Seattle's. You don't even need teeth, since everything's cooked to a mushy brown goodness. Mmmmmm! Sugar piled onto everything, including the meat. Barbecue Sauce made mostly with good-ol' Karo Syrup an' some Onion Powder! And then there's the Sweet Tea! Ever had Sweet Tea? They have it down to a science, as to gitting as much Sugar as possible dissolved into the Tea. (you pour the boiling hot liquid into the container holding the sugar) Then, at the table, you grab that big ol' Sugar Dispenser, and pour in more. You sit with your glass o' Sweet Tea, and stir constantly, keeping that Sugar in motion (remember, the tea is saturated with sweetness, and the Sugar can't dissolve any more), so, between LOUD slurps and sips and sucking noises, you make like a Cement Mixer with your long ol' Iced Tea Spoon....just a stirrin' an' a sippin' an' a slurpin'! That way, you can git a half-cup or so extra Sugar into your system with each refreshing glass. Aaaaaah! The good life!"
And while I'm at it, I might as well share my Quintessentially Mississippi BBQ sauce recipe from that same post. I'm being totally spurious here:
"...But wait! There's more! Just for considering Jackson's irresistible appeal, this recipe for Gloria'sYou're-as-good-as-hooked-to-a-Dialysis-Machine BBQ Sauce is yours, free of cost or obligation!!!
A bottle of Karo Syrup
Half a bottle of 'Hickory Smoke in a Bottle'
A packet of Grape Kool Aid
A cup of Onion Powder
A handful of Crisco Shortening
A bunch of Monosodium Glutamate
2 cups store brand Salad Dressing (like Mayo, but with more Sugar, so it's better)
A bunch of salt
A cup of store-brand Lemon Juice Substitute
Four tablespoons Chile Powder
Pour ingredients into a bowl, and stir until the mixture reaches an even phlegmatic consistency. Brush onto meat, or dispense into small bowls for dipping between bites.
Being from Bristol I don't think you will have any problem. Some may ask where you hail from out of curiosity, but I would seriously anyone will have a real problem with the mild accent you would have coming from Bristol. You will not be considered a Yankee coming from Virginia.
Sweet tea if everywhere below the mason dixon line, you can buy pre-maid tea, but tea bags, sugar, and a pitcher is the only way to go, if you want to buy premade tea i would recommend Milos its actually real brew tea and not instant. i live in Meridian and dont think you would be called a yankee, i say YOU GUYS more than YALL and trust me i am no Yankee, hope all goes well for you in our states Capital, i would recommend living somewhere like Brandon and just commute to Jackson, i would not want to live in Jackson unless i had alot of Money to stay out of the bad low income neighborhoods, unfortunately thats jackson now!
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Will I be regarded as a Yankee
