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All of the people saying NYC are off the mark - way off. Nexis is the only person who understood that Staten Island is NOT the same as Manhattan, even though both are boroughs of NYC. Staten Island is not reachable by train - period. It is an island only reachable by car from NJ. I travel often to Cranbury, NJ - it is approximately a 30 min drive from my home (looking at the VN Bridge) with no traffic. Depending upon where on SI you need to go, the trip could be a breeze. As for Cranbury to Philly, should be about 45 min to 1 hr.
It would be incredibly stupid to take a train or bus into Manhattan and then have to make your way downtown to the ferry to Staten Island or grab an "express" bus for the hour ride to Staten Island. Staten Island does have mass transit, but it can take an hour or more to get from one point to another by bus or SIRT - there is NO subway on Staten Island. It's an island. It's a 20 min ferry ride from the lowest tip of Manhattan and at least a 45 min ride by car through Brooklyn and over the most expensive bridge in the world - the Verazzano Narrows Bridge. When I go to Manhattan by car, I drive in through NJ and take a tunnel - it's faster.
So I'd look in the Cranbury area - but think NJ Turnpike as that will be the main route you'll need to Staten Island.
As much as I hate to say so you are right either NJT or MTA need to step up on this travel market!!!!!!
Staten Island definitely is a drive situation from NJ. There actually is a train bridge to NJ, just North of the Goethals Br and next to it. It was in the open lifted position for about 40 years until a year or two ago they rebuilt the tracks and ran some feight trains to NJ. So you could wait a few years and hop the next freight train or drive in. It actually was commutable when I was a kid, you could dtake a bus to the foot of Elizabeth, NJ a ferry crossed over the river for 10 cents. On the SI side you'd take another bus across Forest Ave. They even took cars over for 10 cents back then too. My cousin drove back then and used it to avoid the bridge tolls.